I'm not actually Jeffrey because

[HoneyDragon]

In the interests of putting rest the suspicion and paranoia amongst us.
Especially as many of us will be newbies again I feel we should all (including MNHQ) prove we're not Jeffrey. By posting something our Jeffrey just wouldn't do, but a Mnetter would.

It won't take long and it's for the greater good.

I shall begin

I'm not actually Jeffrey because I steal toilet brushes from Centerparcs.

Right, who's up next?

I'm not Jeffrey because I clean all my children's toys, clothes and in fact my children in the dishwasher (along with the dog)...'Tis brilliant!

I'm not Jeffrey because i had a Christmas ruined by Moldies

I'm not 'Jeffers' because I change my sheets when I can be arsed.

I'm not Jeffrey because I'm a Cheshire scumbag.

I will never bake another lemon drizzle cake for a cake sale for fear of being mistaken for the LDB.

I'm not Jeffrey because at the time of the hack my Ocado shopping was being delivered by Jesus in a cabbage van.

I'm not Jeffrey, but if I ever saw him I'd call 101 so fast I wouldn't have time to rinse my mince.

I am not Jeffrey because bad ham farts and naice ham doesn't

I'm not Jeffrey because I live in Ambridge and Rob is my world. Why would I need anyone else ?

I'm not Jeffrey because I'm not a massive, veiny bellend.

IANJ even though he has more make up than me. Also because I know more about applying it.

And because I didn't realise he was trying to be something out of a crap film till someone pointed it out.

I'm nto jerffey nad I'm nto cod eihter. Honset.

IANJ because I can now correctly identify all female reproductive parts and also know that my fanjo is self cleaning.

I'm not Jeffrey because I'm not a SpoonyFucker.

I'm not Jeffrey because I've never been jack-hammered whist flicking the bean.

:(

I'm not Jeffrey because When he's mentioned I think "ODFOJ" also I know what EatShitDerek's username means

I'm not Jeffrey because I have spent the past twenty minutes identifying the name changers.
Swearysweary was particularly helpful

I'm not Jeffrey because I know how to make sinister Easter bonnets, and know that if I post anything in Chat about Christmas MaryZ will come and shout at me.

I'm not Jeffrey because I once spent a whole day entranced by the actions of the Elderly Korean Lady (and campaigned for a [pink visor] emoticon)

I am not Jeffery because I'm growing out my grey roots and I can make some beautiful quilts.

I think we should change AIBU to AIBJ though

I'm not Jeffrey 'cause I love a bit of woo and I don't let my dh eat fat balls.

I'm not Jeffrey and YABU to think that I might be.

I'm not Jeffery but I am a Mexican house thief