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Original poster

How to approach finding someone else’s lipstick in DHs car?

215 replies

ROTFLBSST · 09/01/2021 11:18

How would you word it? DH works nights, me days. There’s opportunity for sure but no evidence. I think it’s human nature to jump to the worst conclusion but before I go nuclear how could I word it so if it is innocuous I don’t shoot myself in the foot either....advice gratefully received!

OP posts:
starfishmummy · 09/01/2021 13:57

Does unlocking a ohone with a sleeping lersons finger even work? For a start you'd need to know which finger, and 90% of the time the fingerprint thing doesnt work on my phone anyway....

CurlyhairedAssassin · 09/01/2021 14:00

OP, if this is genuine, that's bullshit about the lipstick being from when he put the car in the garage. This is not a reflection on you.

As I said, judging by the info in your other threads, it's concerning that you are in a vulnerable position and now it sounds like your assertiveness skills are diminished somewhat.

ShanniKey · 09/01/2021 14:02

Could be something innocent.

I don't how much of my makeup kit has dropped between and underneath the seats in my car. I am still looking for a pink lipstick that I lost and the chemist is out of stock with.

purpleboy · 09/01/2021 14:06

So his excuse is the garage must of used his car and left a lipstick in there?
I'm sorry op but that is the biggest load of BS I've ever heard.
Reading you op I thought there could be many a good reason for the lipstick to be in your car, but that excuse would set me on edge completely.

LizzieVereker · 09/01/2021 14:12

Sorry OP, I was thinking there could be an innocent explanation until his bizarre garage explanation. That’s nonsense and made it worse in my opinion. Are you in the UK? I’d be annoyed about him breaking rules and having people in his car whoever it was at the moment.

Reiningitin · 09/01/2021 14:12

I don't even understand the excuse. Why would the garage use his car? To road test it after repairs? Why would the person doing that take a lipstick with them?

Crabwoman · 09/01/2021 14:15

If you were given a bag of clothes then text the person and ask if it was there's and do they want it back?

If it rolled out from behind the seat it might have been there ages. From pre-covid days when we used to give lifts to colleagues etc.

If it's a second hand car it night be a previous owners and have been wedged in...I found a small baggy of stale weed in my car after a year of ownership. 😂

Plenty of things to consider but I would'nt jump to conclusions at this point.

ooohbriefcase · 09/01/2021 14:18

@ROTFLBSST

Asked him first if he’d had people in the car, said his mates, any ladies? Answer was no, he said why do you ask and showed him the lipstick. Was a genuine reaction, he thinks it’s might be from when he put the car in the garage and they’ve used it. Thank you all for taking the time to reply, me jumping is a reflection on me more than anything.
ConfusedHmm that's the best he could come up with? And you believe it?
CheetasOnFajitas · 09/01/2021 14:19

Oh dear. You’re not swallowing that nonsense are you?

CatMumOnPurrlough · 09/01/2021 14:21

@purpleboy

So his excuse is the garage must of used his car and left a lipstick in there? I'm sorry op but that is the biggest load of BS I've ever heard. Reading you op I thought there could be many a good reason for the lipstick to be in your car, but that excuse would set me on edge completely.
I second this.

Perhaps he may have even noticed it was missing (found in car and intentionally hidden under the mat?) and had an excuse on the back burner?

pocushocus · 09/01/2021 14:24

@ROTFLBSST

Asked him first if he’d had people in the car, said his mates, any ladies? Answer was no, he said why do you ask and showed him the lipstick. Was a genuine reaction, he thinks it’s might be from when he put the car in the garage and they’ve used it. Thank you all for taking the time to reply, me jumping is a reflection on me more than anything.
Are you mental op ? He is lying ! Car in the garage my arse 😂 wow
Jobsharenightmare · 09/01/2021 14:25

Just straight out ask him, you'll know from his response if he's being honest or not.

^ all the evidence suggests this not to be the case. Cheaters are by definition adept liars hence being able to look you straight in the eye and tell you they're going to work etc missing out the bit about meeting the OW in a hotel on the way back.

I'm sorry OP but to be honest even if he was lying odds are you wouldn't be able to tell.

Jobsharenightmare · 09/01/2021 14:26

Oh no, you're update makes no sense. So he's saying a female employee of the garage left it there?

CaMePlaitPas · 09/01/2021 14:28

Eh? A bloke at the garage dropped his lipstick in the van? I wouldn't be buying any of what he's selling OP. Keep an eye on him. God drops pebbles on your head before dropping the rock, perhaps you can consider this a pebble.

CherryBlossomTree7 · 09/01/2021 14:31

That explanation does not add up. Is he trying to say that a female employee at the garage dropped it in there? How many garage workers do you know who are female? And would wear dark red lipstick to work in a garage? Or is he saying that a male garage employee might have taken his wife in his car? This would never happen. The employee is at work and would get sacked for using a client's car.

He is definitely lying OP. Clutching at straws. There has been a woman in the car with him.

ShanniKey · 09/01/2021 14:34

If you are down there? See if you can find a pink lipstick I dropped. See what happens when you try to do the first touchup of the day using a rear view mirror.

EmmeG · 09/01/2021 14:34

Nooooo. You should have asked to see his phone there and then. On the spot.
The garage?? Does he think you’re stupid.
He’s up to something IMO.
This is not a reflection on you. You’re allowed to ask why their is a lipstick in your car and the answer should make sense!!

Anydreamwilldo12 · 09/01/2021 14:36

Ludicrous excuse. I would have followed that up with a lot more questions.

Livelovebehappy · 09/01/2021 14:37

You’ll be able to tell from his face just by asking him about it. Casually mention you’ve found a lipstick in his car. I’m betting you know him well enough to see by his reaction whether there is anything going on with some other woman.

Livelovebehappy · 09/01/2021 14:39

Sorry! Should have rtft before commenting! Things have moved on.

Original poster
ROTFLBSST · 09/01/2021 14:40

We’re trying to work out how it could’ve gotten there, it was one of the options. He’s not sure how it came there

OP posts:
EmmeG · 09/01/2021 14:42

@ROTFLBSST get his phone off him now. If you don’t look at it and make sure he isn’t lying - you’re going to be paranoid forever more!!

Flittingaboutagain · 09/01/2021 14:45

I don't know anyone who confessed to an affair when asked about clues. Only when the man decides he's leaving does he (sometimes) admit the OW exists.

No way did a garage employee take the car and drop a lipstick in it.

ShanniKey · 09/01/2021 14:46

Do you know the mechanic's shade?

Mrsmadevans · 09/01/2021 14:47

@formerbabe

Could there be an innocent explanation? Does he give lifts to any women that you know about? To be honest, I think a classic ow move is to 'accidentally' leave an item for the wife to find...
This in spades, get your ducks in a row OP , l hope l am wrong Flowers