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Original poster

Dating Thread 156 - It is hot hot hot

999 replies

midcenturylegs · 22/04/2019 21:36

Dating thread rules:

  1. The first rule about the dating thread is you don't talk about it with people you're dating.
  2. Develop a thick skin.
  3. Do not invest emotionally too soon.
  4. It's all BS until it actually happens.
  5. Trust your gut instinct.
  6. People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault.
  7. You are the prize - they should be trying to impress you.
  8. If it's not fun, stop.
  9. Loo update is mandatory.
10. No dating the thread. 11. Do unto others as you would have them do to you.

And a reminder - you don't know them until you know them!

Link to Info on Dating Websites & Apps www.mumsnet.com/Talk/relationships/3514717-List-of-Dating-Site-Info-Dating-Thread?watched=1

Link to previous thread:
www.mumsnet.com/Talk/relationships/3543468-dating-thread-152-onwards-and-upwards

OP posts:
Original poster
midcenturylegs · 22/04/2019 21:40

Hi all - apologies for the cheesy title!

OP posts:
MrDrummer · 22/04/2019 21:54

Thank-you. Mine was going to be "Budge up on the smitten bench" but you beat me to it.

MN's having problems, anyway. :(

WarIsPeace · 22/04/2019 22:40

Checking in Cake

lifegoes · 22/04/2019 22:50

Ok so how long after a first date and DTD 🙈 should I expect a guy to text?
We’ve been chatting for weeks but heard nothing since leaving him today

MrDrummer · 22/04/2019 23:00

@lifegoes

Have you tried to message him? How was it left?

lifegoes · 22/04/2019 23:05

Really well. He asked to see me again, we spent time together. We kissed, he said I’ll speak to you later.

lifegoes · 22/04/2019 23:06

I didn’t want to message first.

MrDrummer · 22/04/2019 23:12

@lifegoes He's probably thinking the same thing... if you like him, message him... The longer you both leave it, the weirder its going to get.

I think I would wait til tomorrow now though. Messaging this late will look a bit strange.

MrDrummer · 22/04/2019 23:14

@lifegoes You messaging on WhatsApp? Hopefully he hasn't blocked you Shock

lifegoes · 22/04/2019 23:14

I just assumed he would message tbh I didn't give any signs to doubt that I didn't enjoy it. (I don't think)

I'll wait till tomorrow afternoon and see if he texts in the morning

@MrDrummer

lifegoes · 22/04/2019 23:14

@MrDrummer he hasn't blocked me. Lol

kerkyra · 22/04/2019 23:17

life wait for him to txt if you can, isn't it true that some men go into their mancave and need time to reflect? others will not give the sex another thought. Be patient. Seems you had a connection before you dtd but I wouldn't chase. Hope he txts soon

lifegoes · 22/04/2019 23:18

@kerkyra we had a connection and had a lovely afternoon together today after DTD. So fingers crossed he texts

JeSuisPrest · 22/04/2019 23:23

@TooOldForThis67 So pleased for you MrWow sounds like a keeper 😍

@lifegoes - you're allowed to text first if you want, but it's a bit strange that you've not heard anything from him all day though if you're normally frequent texters.

I'm feeling a bit fragile tonight. I've ended my FWB arrangement with MrPlumber. We're both pretty upset but it's for the best and I feel that now I can put all my efforts into MrCornish - if that works out, great, if it doesn't it won't be because my attention was divided between 2 men.

I'm a great believer in fate, and if MrPlumber and I are meant to be we will, just not at this point in time. TooOld is proof it can happen but I can't hang around waiting for the pieces of his life to fall into place. It's tough though, I didn't think I'd be this upset over ending it.

lifegoes · 22/04/2019 23:29

@JeSuisPrest I thought he would text tonight. We only left each other this afternoon. But he hasn't! So I'm assuming that's done then 🙄 least I had fun.

Why have you ended it with Mr Plumber?

MrDrummer · 22/04/2019 23:34

wait for him to txt if you can, isn't it true that some men go into their mancave and need time to reflect?

Even I am not that complicated, @kerkyra !

Right I have put that photo from facebook you recommended onto PoF and Tinder and changed back my profile from the weird thing you recommended, with some tweaks. Still can't make it visible though. PoF playing up I think.

MrDrummer · 22/04/2019 23:39

@JeSuisPrest Really tough, but a massive step forward. Might want to give yourself some time to come to terms with what just happened. Clearly Mr Plumber was more than FWB. Are you remaining friends?

30somethingandsingle · 22/04/2019 23:41

 @JeSuisPrest Thanks difficult for you but I think you have made the right decision.

JeSuisPrest · 22/04/2019 23:42

@lifegoes Dont overthink it tonight - see what tomorrow brings.

MrPlumber isn't in a place to have a "proper" relationship which is what I want. He knows this and has intimated that if he had several other things in his life sorted we'd be ideal for each other, but he says it's unfair on either of us to start something when he's not 100% available mentally or physically (he works away a lot). So we do the messaging, phone calls and sex bit without calling it a relationship 🤷‍♀️ It's been going on for 6 weeks and during this time I have compared every other iron to him and found fault with them because they are not him, which is crazy. So I've grasped the nettle and it stings like hell but it's for the best. If I keep telling myself that I'll believe it eventually.

30somethingandsingle · 22/04/2019 23:44

I am still feeling really rubbish about my stbexh. I don't know what I want anymore. Radio silence from MrFox isn't helping either, I thought hearing from him/arranging something might make things clearer but nope, nothing other than a message once yesterday and once today which is much less than normal. We have both been busy with the bank holiday weekend so I'm hoping it's just that and he's not about to ghost me Confused

MrDrummer · 22/04/2019 23:47

@lifegoes If it was just this afternoon, I think it is too early to call it finished.

JeSuisPrest · 22/04/2019 23:51

@MrDrummer Yes we're going to stay friends- this is a message he sent me tonight

"I respect that so so so much.
You are amazing and wonderful and you will always be a part of my heart!
I will stick by what I said and say that I shall always be here for you, I mean always and I am on the end of the phone whenever you need anything, even if it’s reassurance or help of any nature. JeSuis you know I mean it and you know it’s true.

I am most happy to be your friend and I still want us to be able to go out for a drink together etc. I would be lost without you in my life so please stay in it!!! I’ll call you in the week if you ok with that? You know I care and you also know that you mean so much to me. You are amazing and perhaps my timing or even OUR timing is off. Please stay in touch as you are such a joy and so lovely to be around."

Not lovely enough apparently 😭

MrDrummer · 22/04/2019 23:57

Christ, that's heartbreaking, @JeSuisPrest :''''(

MrDrummer · 23/04/2019 00:01

I am really worried that regular contact is still going to be a distraction, though.

When you were talking about Mr Plumber recently and the way you have spoken about Mr Cornish before, I felt I was watching an emotional train-wreck about to happen.

Notcoolmum · 23/04/2019 00:08

Ohh lifegoes who is the new iron??

jesuis hugs. But I'm not sure keeping in touch so often will be a good idea if you are giving Mr C a true go?

Oh 30something sorry to hear about Mr Fox. Was he just v busy this weekend?

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