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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Onit's still on it! Thread 3

985 replies

onitlikeacarbonnet · 23/11/2016 13:49

Hello to anyone who's still here Smile

Links to previous threads.

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/relationships/2658829-Anyone-up-DH-is-leaving-me

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/relationships/2690159-Anyone-up-DH-is-leaving-me-follow-up-thread-Onits-on-it

I'm carrying on with this as I'm certain I'd be in a much unhappier state without the support I've received here.
This has become my journal of sorts and I hope it's something I can look back on in time to see how far I've come.
I also hope it helps to document the truth of my situation for the future and perhaps, if read by others, will offer help and hope to them too.

OP posts:
underitoveritthroughit · 02/03/2017 08:34

Date day !!!

AgathaF · 02/03/2017 10:02

Woo hoo!!!!! Grin

User1958 · 02/03/2017 10:49

Ha ha onit Grin
Name change queen here so you won't recognize me....but...,

Oh Lordy!!! Fabulous dress, great attitude and without it being to cringe... so proud of you Blush

Wine
Splishing · 02/03/2017 11:06

Wow Onit so glad you have a date. I too joined POF a while ago due to a friend suggesting it. I haven't put a pic up yet. I chickened out after joining. Just not sure if I am ready for it yet. I am so glad you are moving forward. Hoping I will get to that stage eventually. Hope the date goes well. Another big step forward. And the dress looks fab! The tone of your posts have changed so much from when you first started posting. It so nice to see that change to a more confident and strong person.

nigelforgotthepassword · 02/03/2017 14:41

I'm so excited for you onit--don't do anything I wouldn't do Wink
let us know how it goes (I'm
Not overinvested in this at all!!! Grin)
Stay safe, have a great time!!

MrsPeelyWaly · 02/03/2017 16:12

We're right behind you Onit!

Have a great time!

AgathaF · 02/03/2017 17:04

You're going to have so many people willing you on, so to speak, tonight Grin.

underitoveritthroughit · 02/03/2017 17:20

I'm ready!
Going to leave soon so I can check into the hotel without him knowing I have a room.
My dsis is aware I might stay over (because I want to have a drink Wink)

Kittencatkins123 · 02/03/2017 18:24

AMAZING!!!!!! can you Mumsnet mid date?

MrsPeelyWaly · 02/03/2017 18:35

You're going to have so many people willing you on, so to speak, tonight grin

As if she needs our encouragement Grin Grin

Go on it! go on it! sang it that teeny bopper kind of chant.

AgathaF · 02/03/2017 18:50

There'll be a lot of refreshing of this thread tonight, just in case of an update.

moreslackthanslick · 02/03/2017 20:06

I'm a Facebook friend of onit and can report she looked AMAZING going out on her date.

There's a group of us being "virtual chaperones" via a FB group chat and as soon as I get anything I'll come and post it here for her.

moreslackthanslick · 02/03/2017 21:32

It's going really well so far guys! It's took the little minx over 2 hours to update us although the wifi is bad!

Kittencatkins123 · 02/03/2017 22:43

Amazing!

MrsPeelyWaly · 03/03/2017 03:57

I'm a Facebook friend of onit and can report she looked AMAZING going out on her date

There's a group of us being "virtual chaperones" via a FB group chat and as soon as I get anything I'll come and post it here for her

Thank you for that.

Who would have thought there was so much support out there?

nigelforgotthepassword · 03/03/2017 08:06

Just checking in to see how it went?

underitoveritthroughit · 03/03/2017 09:05

I'm just home Blush

AgathaF · 03/03/2017 09:53

Bet you're tired Wink.

nigelforgotthepassword · 03/03/2017 10:41

Did you have a good time?!!!

Mix56 · 03/03/2017 12:50

Haha, dirty stop out !

Alpies · 03/03/2017 14:03

I want the lo-down! Come on Onit! Don't keep us hanging!

Kittencatkins123 · 03/03/2017 19:30
Grin
underitoveritthroughit · 03/03/2017 21:47

Sorry been running around all day.

What Happened on Onits Date...

Got there early, I had booked a room in the pub we were meeting in (didn't tell him) so checked in, dumped a change of clothes etc then went to sit in the bar and wait.
Had a drink to calm my nerves but I was ok amazingly.
No phone signal and no wifi so I was a bit worried but managed to send something to my pals eventually.
I was in the bar all by myself. I felt pretty exposed (overdressed) but I was really early to avoid him knowing I had a room, so my own fault.

I saw him through the window as he crossed the road and we both smiled at each other.
He walked in, gave me a hug and asked if he could kiss me. So we had a quick kiss. No snogging.
He went to get a drink and when he sat down he took my hand, we chatted quite easily and he just kept looking into my eyes.
I felt comfortable with him almost right away. He put his arm round me and pulled me close still holding my hand. He
We just chatted for a bit.
He kept looking at me really intensely then he said he really wanted to kiss me. So we kissed. Nothing obscene or anything. There were a few other punters in the bar by now.
He kept saying how gorgeous I was Blush and was just really sweet.
And a little bit saucy too. (Whispered in my ear some of the things we'd chatted about online).
When we'd finished our drinks, we went to sit in his car (I know!!! I'm not 17 but, as far as he was aware, it was our only way to be alone)

After a little time (and once the windows had steamed up a bit Smile) I asked him what he'd do if I told him I had a room.
He said he wanted to hold me (awww) so I showed him the key and said he was welcome to come back if he wanted.

There was a bit of xrated stuff then we fell asleep for a few hours woke up very early and had another hour or so before my alarm.

He had to leave to be home for his dc. So he reluctantly got dressed and left.
After a half hour or so, I eventually got up, had a shower, sorted myself out and left too.

We've been chatting online on and off today trying to arrange another date.
It's going to be difficult. He lives a hundred miles away and has his dc the weekend mine are with LCB.

But if it fizzles out I think I'll be ok. If it lasts a bit, that'd be good too.
I've never had a man look at me the way he did. Straight in the eye like that.
I liked it.
He was also very attentive (iykwim Blush)

If you have any questions, ask away!
I may or may not answer.

Mix56 · 04/03/2017 07:49

I have one !!!

Are we sure this man is single ?

nigelforgotthepassword · 04/03/2017 08:03

Well at the very least you've got back on the um....horse, so to speak.
Grin good for you onit!!