DRY 10!!!!

[CheesyNachos]

Welcome! This is the thread for those of us who want to abstain from alcohol. We are all at different stages of our journey, and many of us have some hiccups along the way, but we are committed to an exciting, fulfilling, joyful life alcohol-free.

Previous thread is here.

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/relationships/2485290-DRY-9?pg=1

Everyone is welcome!

drink, drunk, repent, repeat

Perfect description!

It's the 'repeat' bit I aim to avoid!

Wow! What a busy thread. I'm on my phone so I can't remember who asked about the flashbacks was it matron?
Anyway I am quite proud of mine in a way. Because I don't do it anymore and I have made a comittment to myself not to do it in future. It - drunken fool
I am past caring... now. But I did care very much at the time as you are caring now so take this fantastic opportunity to not be that person again.
Someone said to me in the early days of my sobriety that we are the lucky ones and I do honestly believe that. Lucky to realise that our drinking had become unmanageable. I know it might not seem like it in the early days but life is so much better without alcohol in it. To all you newcomers please give it a good crack. I'm happier than I have been in over 25 years

I strayed away from this thread because I was so complacent and confident that I'd cracked it! Very smug and self assured with my alcohol free life.

But my spectacular fall from grace last week has shown me otherwise.

I will be sticking around on here from now on.

I've avoided the lunch wine (easyish as I'm with DH). I've got 2 boozy work events and 2 boozy social events this week- I have a backlog of socials from dry Jan. I'm the go to mate for a good time.

What did you do about that when you first gave up? Dry Jan people can accept as there is an ending. I am not sure if I want to announce my abstenance plans. It will worry everyone and end in a flood of reassurance that I am fine and should just moderate.

Either don't go ( I wouldn't if it were me) or think up an acceptable white lie if you really want or have to go? Antibiotics, early drive tomorrow, giving up for Lent, personal bet, that sort of thing? or go, but think of an excuse to leave early ( and make sure you drove there! but don't be designated driver as that way you have to stay until the end...)

I'm with glad matron ACE it (Avoid, Control - drive/excuse, Escape - arrive late/leave early) :)

lucy did you help write the MOB Club Soda stuff ;) ?

And can I plug the MOB course on Club Soda as well as Lucy's Udemy course? Really both have helped me in so many ways - not just in giving up drink (76 days!! this time and over 340 days in the last 12 months) but a real lifesaver in the last few days. And I mean that in the most literal way you can imagine.

Lucy thank you for all you do and continue to do. and anything else you can think of :)

Thanks glad :) Nope I didn't but seeing as we run workshops together sometimes there might be a co-mingling of material

Thanks for the tips I will give it a go. My emotions are everywhere today. Back to being ashamed. I seriously thought of going back to the pub to confront the strangers to put an end to my anguish.

Bringon I think you will find great relief tomorrow. Try not to lose any sleep tonight. I was turning the scenario round and thinking what would I feel if I was a bystander watching Matron being an arse and the brutal truth is not a lot and I certainly would not be analysing the antics of a drunk stranger 2 days on (or colleague or friend or family for that matter).

What's your business Lucy? Are you a professional?

Lucy can I have links to your stuff please?

Matron my sober blog is here I am a nurse if that's what you mean by professional :) I won't post a link to my Udemy course for fear of MNHQ ire but if you go to blog there is a side bar to the right of the blog content and the top image contains an embedded link to the Udemy course Glad mentioned. If you want to see my professional credentials go to the about page where they are all listed

Wow Lucy just had a butcher's at your blog - very impressive!

Thanks Lucy . I will busy myself with blog reading today.

I'm deep in the repenting phase. My house is spotless and I've thrown myself into work with gusto since 7am in a bid to convince myself I'm a good person.

Does anyone else have these wildly productive periods followed by a massive reward drinking session for being so good at life, followed by being so broken from alcohol that days are written off with apathy and physical recovery?

The sun is shining here. Have a good one everyone.

Love Lucy's blog. :) Such a great mix of informed discussion and research and chat. :)

Matron if at all possible I would avoid the social events this week, or at least definitely drive so you have to stay dry. The danger period is when the feelings of embarrassment start to fade. But great excuses are Lent, 'Febfast' (which is I think the New Zealand equivalent of Dry January)or even 'I overdid it last night so am backing off'. I like the personal bet one too. Or just -- give yourself permission not to go or permission to leave early!!!! I think it is liberating to put your own needs first sometimes. My late FIL used to say 'I'm too old to do things I don't want to do'. Good approach sometimes!!

Thanks Cheesy I've cancelled the social ones and paired up with colleagues for the work ones so that I can leave clients in company and slip off. I like the bet one too. I was considering a Drs orders excuse but thought that might cause alarm.

So much for worker of the week award, I've done nothing but read Lucy's super blog.

Thanks matron i think i have made it through with job and reputation still intact although i have gone from being the quiet one to the drunken ringleader blamed for everyone elses sore heads. On the whole i think they are happy to laugh at me, worry about their own behaviour and move on. Phew 《sigh of relif》.

But either way i am committed to not drinking. I am putting if down to dry March (sort of like a spring cleaning of the body).

Lucy i will look forward to reading your blog. I have decided on a compromise. Whilst i will not end my drinking on a high (so to speak) it will still be a choice made with a clear head not driven by remorse. So despite the fact i havent drunk since and will not tonight my No drinking shall officially commence on 1st march. Think i may have some sort of wierd mental condition - this rationalising cannit be normal behaviour.

Bringon I have been checking my phone and fretting for you. So pleased your job and reputation are in tact.

We are now in the danger zone for repetition. Dry March is a good one it takes the need to constantly come up with excuses away for a while.

In my experience society is willing to accept a multitude of anti social behaviour from drunks. Can you imagine a sober person being excused for the same actions.

matron thanks for the fretting. Good to know i have support. I work in a male dominated and boozy industry, so there is a small liklihood i can get away with being out of hand occasionally. But god my stress and mental anxiety levels are not cut out for it anymore.

You are right about our society. If is hugely pro-alcohol. It is almost a sin not to drink! But i think that is everyone else trying to calm their own fears.

A straight dry March does nake it easier to explain, then i plan on saying 'i feel so great and so much healthier i llan on keeping it up for a while so i look great in my bikini in summer' or something like that!

If you do it for charity people are often more understanding ( and may give you some sponsorship) and it can be a motivation to stay dry. Lots of people fundraise during DJ and Stoptober etc. Just a thought :)

I've gone back and read the thread. Sorry Lucy your links and others are all there dotted around

Where is Santa was their 1 year anniversary made on 28 January?

Gosh there are a lot of posters I can relate to. Some inspirational reading.

Dry March is a good one. Thanks Bringon. My last drink was 28 December so I'm on day ?63. I have found it ok explaining the situation to my closest friends, but I have found it a bit awkward explaining why I'm not drinking to other people / colleagues / acquaintances. Dry March has a good ring to it I shall certainly be using that. It is slightly depressing seeing people do a double take... It makes me realise that I was considered quite the piss head although people would not say so.

Thanks Fontella, Cheesy & Matron. Not to worry Matron :)
Bring That sounds like entirely rational 'drinking thinking' in my experience CBT will help with that.

It's not even 3 full days since I climbed a bar stool and I'm ready for drink. Gah!

I didn't give in once in dry Jan so it's beyond me why I'm so weak.

You're not weak Matron - it's an addictive substance. As you know from Dry Jan the craving will pass ......