Dating, Loitering and Sofa Surfing, It's All Happening! Dating Thread 16.

[TimeForMeAndDD]

In continuation from previous thread:

Watch do not talk exclusivity until you have assessed the contents of his trouser department after the 5th date. Only after you have assessed the contents of his trouser department the 5th date do you decide whether or not the willy he is worth the commitment.

And yes, of course you go on Friday!! What on earth are you thinking woman! Today you were the BOSS of a coconut shy, a few of his friends will be nothing compared to that!

I've got to go make coffee, I've just watch Paying it Forward and I am in bits! BITS!

Okay, maybe in future I should read the rest of the thread before posting

watch wrt esing up on the sex side, I don't think that's a bad idea. It'll give you chance to assess (not right word but you know what I mean) the rest of the relationship and see where it's going.

Johnny Depp on POF? High standards and wet fish remaining positive

Should explain that the last bit is referring to the slap with the wet fish in order to stop thinking negatively.

I'll stop speaking to myself now

Chaotic, I'm.not sure its less sex that's the thing, but just that things went a bit wrong last night. We have done lots of no sex things too, just the last two times were abit ' get as mucg as possible becauxe I'm going away'
It just went wrong. But I still think It's good we have talked about it, he's accepted it was him ( without me saying so) all sorted out, know why it happened, won't happen again( and if it does thats it) . Feels good to have talked it though actually. Very mature and honest approach.

watch I'm glad you've sorted things out :) I can understand the get as much as possible because it'll be a while before it happens again.

Very glad it's sorted, Watch. You sound happy again.

I'll forgive Mr Lovely for now - but he'd better not do it again

(Stealth boast alert)

I love, love, love MN. So much, actually, I think I might marry it.

I stuck some dumb poems on here the other day to see what people thought - and they loved 'em. One angel of a person has shown them (through a friend of a friend) to the picture book editor of a MAJOR (and I mean MAJOR) children's publisher who loves 'em too - and wants to see more!!!!!!!!!! Suggests I aim towards the very young market (3+).

I'm so excited, and I just can't hide it.......So, I have decided to become a very rich, very famous children's poet. Better get to work.

That's all. As you were.

Watch ...

I am similar to you, I have a huge sex drive and highly adventurous but I would never entertain this man again after the way he has behaved.

You were left feeling bad and cheap which is bad enough
but he hit you without prior consent!!!! That would be the end of it for me

A few years ago, I had a regular FB, one night he put his hand around my throat, I knew at that moment I couldn't trust him and he was out the door in about 2 mins. It was disrespectful, I will not be disrespected and neither should you.

Do you want to be with a man that while you are at your most vunerable, whacks you?? He at that moment did not see you as an equal sexual partner - you were nothing

He may be apologetic but in the heat of the moment, he whacked you for his own pleasure. How many times would you be willing to let him do that?? You say he won't again but I bet he didn't think it through and the chances are he will repeat it, because that's what he likes. And you will prob be waiting for it to happen again, which will take away the freeness you feel when having sex

Blaming you for his unusual sexual habits is also wrong - he has the problem, he needs to sort it not blame you.

Please really think about things while you are away, yes it's been lovely for you but this last encounter should be your last with him imo

I woyidnt say It's all resolved.
But just that we have talked ( and no doubt will again face to face) and the ' off kilter ness' from last night has been dealt with.

Yep, no sex till next sat. Ages.

Mrs c.... Yes. But ive slapped him round the face ( hard enough to leave a red mark for awhile) a few Times.
And ( God lord, embarassing) I like a bit of slapping and gentle pinching. And hands on my neck and throat.

So, I think it was just an assumption id like it. Because it wasn't so out of context from nothing... If that makes sense. I slslapped him back straight away.

There was too much slapping!!!!!! Or maybe because of the Time frame it wasn't balanced with some softer, more love making, gentle sex ( which we also both like) actually, its probably that that made it not sit right. Had it of been balanced with gentle, slow, attentiveness I wouldnt have thought.anything of it.

I feel I need to add a disclaimer than I am absolutely not being taken advantage of in any way. I only do what I like ( selfish like that) and that ive handcuffed him and taken advantage a few Times.... It's not one sided :)

We are alike, I totally get you but I still think the whole evening - as you have explained it - was a big red flag

You want mutual enjoyment that is on the far side of vanilla, that is fine

What has struck me is you being left feeling shocked, cheap and used. Sounds to me more like he had sex on you, not with you. And that it is only 4 weeks and already he has behaved in a way you weren't happy with, not one thing but a string of things

Far side of vanilla is good, being left feeling bad isn't. Please have a good think over your holiday

Crikey, crikey thats brilliant do you need an illustrator? :)

I think watch has made her mind up, will take the holiday to reflect and do the best thing for her. :). It will be fine.

I.didn't feel used. Just cheap..
And he didn't have sex on me, I came about 6 times I think......it was with me. I know the difference.

It wasn't great, he said something before I did. I'll be on the alert for anythihg that doesn't sit right.

No commitment has been made, if things aren't right I just end it, I'm.not going to put up with rubbish....

And Crikey, thats amazing. Wow!!!

Watch when I read about your sex life, you having 6 orgasms for instance, in one session I feel a lot bit inadequate, I feel a lot bit short changed. I feel boring!!

Crikey I read your poems, they are fabulous!! I am so very pleased for you

Have just realised we are very nearly 1000 posts

We certainly are.

crikey brilliant news :) Any chance of a link to these poems?

6 isnt many!!!!! tue i had so many in such a short time scalei got a tension headache. ive probably been adveragig 20 plus in a session :)

Okay, there's no need to rub it in

watch glad to read that you are okay and have made sense of it. I am also sort of glad that he apolgised and wants to take you out when you come back from holiday, that shows he respects you, and doesnt want you to feel vunerable in anyway. I am hoping that he is genuinely sorry and it wont happen again.

Thank you to everyone who supported me yesterday when i needed it. I went to see the grave today, took one red rose with my from the rose next to my front door, and a letter, the graves surrounding his and his are a mess. But it was good to just be there, i spoke to him for a while, reliving good times, the times that still stay in my head and for a second on the way home i was sure my little boy had my friends eyes, but it was just an illusion, though both have blue eyes. I know where he is now and last time i walked all but past him, and it seems so wrong, just a plain black cross, I would have understood a cross that was as dark as the darkest night blue, but not black, cos i remember him driving his parents mad trying to get midnight blue, almost black for his room.

And watch i am very jealous of the sex.

Update: Grrr my old friend who is a pilot has tattoos (drools) and muscles (extra drool) but it would be wrong on SOO SOO many levels, ah but god he looks good. I am supposed to catch up with him next time he is this way, and all i am going to be able to do is drool. Obviously nothing can happen, for a start he is hardly ever in the country!!

I have a bad feeling about wed's date.

I text him yesterday morning to say hi etc. I wasn't sure what time he started work yesterday & cos he cant have his phone on thought maybe he wouldnt get it til today. So I got a delivery msg about an hour ago, but no msg back. That's not good is it? :(

So much for looking at new dresses today, not even sure the date will even go ahead now.

Bugger.

oh sponge bloody men, who needs them?? I do not need a man i am independent (MLM repeats several times to herself) If he only got it an hour ago maybe he is being thoughtful (shock horror) and is thinking you are in bed sleeping?

Looking at new dresses is always good, though i cant afford anything new, atm, not until wednesday anyway!

Worried my ex might have hacked my besties profile and know where i live now, or at least the area and that i am no longer at my mums. STRESSED. Want to just jump a plane abroad as fast as i can.

I don't know...he hasn't been online at all which is good I suppose. He may only have had phone on briefly. I know he told me that often he doesnt use it or even switch it on for 4 or 5 days at a time . Mine never leaves my side!

I may be being overly needy I'll see what happens tomorrow. If I don't hear from him at all...that will probably be my answer.

Hope that your Ex hasn't found out too much about where you are etc - you might want to speak to your solicitor about it if you really think he has, they should be able to advise you what steps to take in terms of protecting yourself etc.

sponge, am I going to need to get that hallibut out again?!!!!! Stop over-thinking this date/person.

MLM, glad it went as well as it could have done yesterday.