The Brave Babes Battle Bus - Here's To STAYING On A Sober Holiday!

[Mouseface]

Hello, I'm Mouse

I have an abusive and volatile relationship with alcohol.

This is the Brave Babes Bus, it's filled with sober, drinking and somewhere in between Babes who are all here for the journey ahead, whatever that may entail.

EVERYONE is welcome on this Bus. No-one will judge what you are going through, what you drink, what you don't or what you do.

Come take a seat.

Take a peek at the journeys so far (including the thread by JWN that started this whole journey off) HERE

We understand juju. Have a seat, take the weight off.

Evening Babes

I'm drinking tonight. Because I want to and because I am so stressed out about my MIL. She has an aneurysm for those who don't know and has been increasing getting worse in terms of blackouts and vomiting of late.

She lives with my FIL, about 2 hours drive away. He, however, has a very active lifestyle and is often out all day and early evening.

She too used to be here, there and everywhere but she has now been banned from driving.

I just don't know what to do for the best. She was here last night and cried saying how very scared she is, and has no idea about what the docs can do...... she can't get to see anyone until a week Friday

Anyway, MOP I've not said hello to you in person yet. For me, alcohol has always been a depressant so the more I drink, the lower I get. Then of course there is the whole, 'I'm having a drink because I'm so fed up'............... which came first, the chicken or the egg?

It's hard to know what causes depression or feelings of darkness, feeling fed up, lost and lonely, when you know that there is always a reason that you started to drink and block out real life in the first place. You might not admit to that, or even recognise that that's what's happening.

I drink to soften the edges. I rarely get shit faced but I do drink to much on occasion.

legal - I have just smiled so much reading your post above. You are a different woman! You are so positive and it's fab to see. Go YOU!! xx

Oh, and GOOD LUCK MOP xx

Thanks faire. and sorry, bafana not banana .

Mouse, nice to "meet" you. Feel like I know you already . I'm so sorry you're going through such a painful thing. Thinking of you.

mouse take it easy, small furry one. pace yourself!

And get well soon scatty.

Hi Juju we understand how hard it is to stop or cut down so take a seat

Big hugs Mouse your MIL is lucky to have such a lovely DIL who cares so much. Does she need much day to day care? What have the docs said?

Sorry of I keep missing people but keep popping on/off the bus. Only had 2 glasses tonight now and I'm now on water

Mouse you've come a long. long way in terms of your drinking and you always to be able say the right thing to help others. It's a gift. You seem to know instinctively when you need to let up on yourself and when to reign it back in and I have tons of admiration for you.

My wonderful MIL was diagnosed with terminal cancer last year (they've given her up to 5 years). It completely knocked her for six and she shot down into a pit of despair for several months. Now, though her anti-depressants have kicked in, the treatment is going as well as it can and she's more like her old self. We are taking every opportunity to be with her on her 'good' days and support her and FIL on the tough ones. It's all any of us can do really.

Hi babes. Am also drinking mouse. So sorry to hear about MiL, sounds heartbreaking.

Thank you Babes

Zany - she great, her usual self, her own, wonderful self. And then she blacks out. Vomits. Faints for a moment.

Every time it happens, she loses a little bit more faith in herself. It breaks my heart. We can't do anything but wait just now. Wait. Tick, tock, tick, tock, tick.......

Faire - I'm so sorry to hear about your MIL. It's soul destroying. Maybe we can keep each other company through the next few weeks/months? xx

You guys are the best. I've only had a fruit cider! Rock 'n' Roll! but I'm going to take myself to bed with Nemo and just have a little cry away from my gorgeous DH. He is suffering but can't say it out loud just now.

He knows how much physical pain I'm in with my back and hips so doesn't want to 'burden' me with his own pain. That hurts just as much as MIL being so ill.

MsGee - you know where I am okay? xx

Night lovely people. I'll be back tomorrow with bacon butties, lemon drizzle cake and hot drinks. xx

I'm off the diet this week so I want 3 bacon sarnies and two bits of cake

thanks mouse some days I just need to fall apart a bit x

Night mouse, hope you get to have a little snuggle with the gorgeous Mr Mouse as well as the ultra gorgeous Nemo Mouse. Can you tell I've had a peek at your pictures x

fairenuff there is a queue for Mr Mouse ACTUALLY!! And I'm in front of you!
mouse count me in for the butties AND the lemon drizzle cake. I managed my first "run" in over 7 weeks since the car crash. I managed 12 whole minutes . Bit of a come down from 40 minutes, but at least I'm back out there and trying.
I've had a couple of glasses - as usual - and am off to bed.

Evening All we can now all stop smirking about my muffin .
Just home, and am having a cup of peppermint tea, whilst watching the "50 documentaries to see before you die" - quite impressed at how many I have actually seen!

Sorry to hear about your Mil mouse, chin up my honey, you know where I am anytime and always!

scatty glad to see that I am not the only one who is suffering with the cold, I am bunged up, with a sore throat, and my nose has reached that very lovely point, where it is sore, chapping and flaking - so attractive [not]. My skin is also all breaking out it a most attractive way!!

Mop keeping fingers and toes crossed that you have a good nights sleep and a fab day tomorrow!!

Juju can totally relate to your post, grab a pew, and join us!

msgee no hogging all the bacon rolls!! I want a couple too - with lots of tomato sauce.

Hope everyone else is good, safe and sleeps well
Love
Bafana
xx

Nobody comes between me and bacon rolls!!

JUmps over Fairenuff and Bafana to get the crispiest bacon rolls

Sets alarm for really really early to ensure she beats zany to the bus
pokes tongue out

Guys, you do realise you're in the wrong queue?

Me & ma are queuing for Mr Mouse

hahahaha, I think that you definitely off the bacon roll list then, don't think that mouse is prepared to share mr mouse!!!

Don't think Mr Faire would be too chuffed either.

Mr Faire? Doesn't have quite the same ring to it

Is Mr Mouse hot then?

Welcome juju come and chat or spill your heart out, whichever you prefer You're single post stood out to me because you sound like how I felt a while back. Just knowing that there are others out there who have and are feeling the same way is a great help.

Mouse blimey, you have it coming from all directions, don't you! drink some water maybe and tomorrow will be easier than it would be if you fell off the toilet and bruised yourself again? (that's not to embarrass you, btw, but just to remind you that it's not the answer xx)

I've had a funny old 24hrs, and I've had an epiphany. The reason I don't trust people is because I lie. I've been drinking (and hiding) half bottles of vodka for the last few weeks. No-one knows except you lot now, not even my sponsor. I had one night on holiday when I ended up drinking most of what was left of a bottle of gin that was in the fridge because I knew no-one would know (out of the 10s of visitors they've had all summer) who had done it.

Berate me now.

holly
no berating from me!
Glad that you trust us enough to be honest!
Can you work out why you have been drinking again - how do you feel about it?
Do you want to tell your sponsor? Am in AA too, so understand the honesty thing, and although I love AA and it works for me, I can understand if you don't like its approach and total abstinence "policy".
If this is not what you want - ie you don't want to be drinking, can you be honest with your sponsor - as hard as that conversation may be?

Remember - what they say - we are not saints, we are just trying to grow, we are not expected to be perfect!

Take care of you honey.
Bafana