Staying posifrickentive - Thread 7 for ladies pregnant after mc

[Metalhead]

New thread for all the lovely ladies facing the trials and tribulations of pregnancy after mc!

Thanks all, baby is back to normal now and has been for a good few hours so I don't think there's any point getting checked now, he was just showing off his moves! If anything changed again though I'll be in in a flash.

cloud How long left at work now? (I'm completely obsessed with maternity leave - 27 working days and counting!)

paws has the spotting gone now?

Brilliant news nouser! Better to have weird movement thanks no movement at all I guess, glad its back to normal for you x

Spotting was only that one night, nothing since

disney how's your spotting? Hoping it was a one off for you x

paws so glad to hear your spotting was nothing sinisiter. diseny hope yours is the same.

24 weeks today! Bump is officially a baby. Midwife appointment tomorrow, looking forward to hearing bumps heart beat again. Really wanted to celebrate today, dh and I had planned to take dd out for lunch, but I've just felt exhausted and sick all day. So instead have been sat on the sofa with my feet up working on a couple of cardies for two friends who have recently had baby girls and trying to entertain the idea of eatting something other than a brie toastie. Dh decided to leave me to it, so dd was a monkey and get out all the toys I'd packed away while we've got a bit of building work going on. His going to have to deal with repacking them tonight when he gets home from work!

diddly I had the same with dd, don't remember when it started, but this time around my belly button is just starting to look out of shape. I've been reecomended doublebase when the itching/burning inevetably starts.

Hello ! Just popping my head in :)

Glad your scan was okay allmypaws. disney could you get yourself a scan for reassurance ? I can't even imagine how stressful spotting must be !

nouser glad your gymnast has gone back to behaving. Movement is a never ending worry isn't it !

So I've officially been on maternity leave for two days and I am bored out of my mind. I feel so restless, need something to do other than cleaning the house :/ 38 weeks now, ready for baby to arrive and cure my boredom haha. But I think it will be a while yet, I'm still carrying super high and haven't even had a single braxton hicks, just want to meet her already

I can't bear the thought of going over 40 weeks, are you going to be trying out any of the supposed 'helpers' rebecca such as castor oil or raspberry leaf?

I know what you mean nouser I was sat earlier thinking I could potentially have another 4 weeks. I think if I get to the 40 week mark then I will be trying every thing under the sun ! I just don't feel like I will be giving birth anytime soon. I still feel super sprightly and haven't got that 'get this child out' feeling a lot of women do towards the end. I should count myself lucky really I guess that I still feel so well haha

You never know Rebecca, I felt just like that right to the end with ds and was super surprised to go into labour on my due date! He was super high up and I felt great when I went to bed the night before.

I'm 23 weeks today, one more week and she's viable! Feels like a huge milestone.

Hi can I join please? I'm 14 weeks pregnant now after 2 MCs in the past year. This is a natural conception and my losses were one IVF and one natural. I have a 3 yr old who was conceived with IVF too.
I'm struggling to accept and acknowledge this pregnancy, despite it being much wanted. We only told our parents about it after the 12 week scan and have only told a couple of other relatives so far. I'm dreading telling people more generally as I'm sure they'll be super excited and congratulatory, especially those who know about our previous losses, whereas I just feel numb, detached, scared...and guilty for feeling like that.
Does it ever get better? I just have this underlying anxiety and feel like I'm waiting for it to feel normal but I'm not sure it will.

Hi need, welcome, you'll find lots of understanding and support here.

The way you're feeling is exactally how I've been feeling about this pregnancy. I've got a 3 year old too, with dd I fell pregnant within 3 months of coming off the pill and had a very easy and straight forward pregnancy. Just ended up with an elcs as she was breech. When we felt we were ready for dc2, I fell pregnant right away, but mc at around 5 weeks. Fell pregnant again in the wtf cycle and have now made it to 24+1.

For me this pregnancy hasn't felt 'normal' in the way it did with dd and I wasn't particually anxious when I was pregnant with her. It was rare for me to worry about anything, this time it's been rare for me not to be worried on some level. Although I still get worried, I find now it comes in waves rather than being constant.

I can also relate to the guilt. With dd I was so excited from the moment I found out. We told my parents at around 7 weeks as I was struggling with morning sickness. Mil was told at 14 weeks. We've only just started to tell wider family and some friend in the last couple of weeks. Personally I just haven't been ready for other people's excitment, dh has told people with the added on but we don't want to talk about it constantly. In one of the previous threads when I asked about this a few useful phrases we could use when telling people to avoid their over excitment.

Things have got better from about 15 weeks, since I started to feel bump regually move. We found out we're having a boy this time, which really helped with feeling more of a bond or attachement. We didn't feel the need to find out with ddm I throught I'd find it difficult to buy things, but have found it comforting to buy a few bits that are his and making some things for him.

I found it very sereal to have a appointment to record birth choices at the hospital last week. But it does feel like this will actually happen now.

Welcome need I'm not sure the anxiety every completely leaves but it evolves as your pregnancy progresses. I think for me it has reduced as weeks pass by but there is always something to worry about and I won't relax completely until I'm lying here with my baby. I've been rubbish telling people and still am now at 35 weeks.

So sore belly button continues. Sudacrem hasn't helped. And I'll be having a c section due to placenta previa at 39 weeks. It's official. Unless something happens before then. Not sure what to expect so if anyone has any advice on sections, please feel free to shout.

Newbies feel free to add yourselves to our stats. There's a link on the first page of the thread, or I can do it for you if you let me know.

One. Day. Left. At. Work. Eeeeeek....

Mrs, I had a csection after failed induction. It wasn't bad. Let me know if you have any particular questions about it. Funny enough i had belly button pain too. No one ever told me why but I couldn't walk at times.

7 weeks and symptoms a bit less so obviously I'm having a melt down..next scan on Thursday. Seems a long wait.

Thanks for the welcome! We didn't find out the gender in our first pregnancy but have been wondering about doing it this time, like you say, to help with making it feel real etc. Did it help you?

It's definitely helped us, need - not just the two of us, but has been great for preparing DS to be able to talk about the baby sister and say she and her.

need Finding out that we're having a boy really helped me. It made me feel more conected to bump.

mrs I had an elective c section 3 years ago as dd was breech. I currently have a low lying placenta so may well end up with another if it doesn't move up. It was sereal but a lovely experience and recovery was much better than I expected. Is there anything particular you want to know about? Pre op, the op or recovery? Anything you want to know just ask.

For me the best bits of advice I was given.

• Take arnica tablets to help reduce brusing.
• Expect to be doubled over like an old woman with a zima frame when you first start to move around. Really try not to laugh at yourself, it will hurt if you do.
• Lean forward if you want to cough or sneeze.

I wish I'd known nothing is left in your back from the spinal block, I'm squimish with needles and it's the one thing I didn't ask about. Didn't want to know what happened when it was done but nothing is there to knock when you lie down. The pain reliefe is topped up via iv. And you can normally still have skin to skin right away all being well. Put things like tooth brush, tooth paste and hair brush etc, in a seperate little bag and get them out before you go to surgery so there easy to access if you're not mobile by the evening. I wasn't after 4pm surgery.

Hi need ! Like others have said, time is your friend here. The more the pregnancy progresses, the more the anxiety and worry will (hopefully) be replaced by other things, like having to deal with constipation, breathlessness, sore back and being beaten up from the inside But I do get sad sometimes thinking how much the mcs have taken out the joy of pregnancy...

mrsD I had an EMCS with DS, and will also have an ELCS this time, at 38 weeks (have to go earlier as they won't do it in the week between Christmas and New Year). Everyone I know who had one has said how calm and wonderful it was, so I have high hopes for getting a good birth experience this time. Even thinking if they might let us play some music?!

My advice would be to ask for anything that might make you 'go' more easily afterwards - the pain medication can cause constipation, and sometimes you might need iron supplements, too. Doing a no. 2 after the cs felt like giving birth all over again, and I will definitely bring this issue up this time!
Be aware that you will need assistance with lifting the baby (or anything else)!
Ask your car insurance what their policy is about driving afterwards, they vary in terms of how long you will be restricted.

But overall, I found recovery and healing very straightforward, with very little pain involved that was totally manageable.

Aw thanks for the words of wisdom ladies! I'll be calling our car insurance next week and very sensible advice about getting things out I might need post section dobby I guess I don't have a specific question, was just after some wise words and I know I can count on you guys. If I think if something, I 'll ask. It's crazy raising stuff like this. Feels so long ago I was paying for multiple private scans for reassurance in the first trimester. You will get there newly pregnant ladies. It's a long journey but worth it xx

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/antenatal_clubs/2477997-March-2016-Babies-Heres-thread-5?pg=38&order=

mrs hopefully a link to the description of my c section that I posted on the march thread.

dobby thank you so much!

I'm officially on maternity leave ... Well 3 weeks leave first but that's me done. totally surreal.

Congrats on maternity leave mrsd! Hope you manage to get some relaxing done. It sounds like you are in very safe hands with the elcs too with all the wisdom on here.

Welcome need and congratulations! The anxiety really is something else though. I'm 30 weeks and it's still going strong but this will be my first (mc aside) and so I think it's been bad for me as I don't know what it is like yet to carry a successful pregnancy. lts hard not to feel robbed at times at not being able to relax and enjoy the pregnancy experience but I'm ultimately very grateful to have made it this far. I also second finding out the gender, it made it a bit more real for me.

Welcome need! Lots of support here...i agree with what others have already said, the anxiety will never fully 'go', you just have to try your best to enjoy it, as although the weeks seem to drag by so slowly, before you know it it'll all be over and you'll miss your bump

nouser I couldn't agree with you more! I feel robbed sometimes too, this will be my first baby, and I feel my previous two mc's have well and truly stolen the magic...
I get brief feelings of joy and contentment, but that whole 'cant believe I'm pregnant jump for joy and scream it from the rooftops' feeling just isn't the same as the first time round. I think after mc our brains go into 'self protect/defence' mode, and the supressed happiness is just our body's way of protecting us from future emotional pain should the worst happen. I feel really guilty sometimes, like I'm doing this baby an injustice by not feeling the same as I did before, but I just gently remind myself that it's not 'me' feeling like that, its my stupid brain
Of course I am overjoyed I'm pregnant, and of course I love this baby just as much... Just counting down the days until I have him/her in my arms x

Hi ladies, thought I'd stop by for a friendly ear. My little one is just over 3 weeks and I've ended up back in hospital. All very dramatic, big bleed and ambulances in the middle of the night. Turns out I had some retained placenta do just out of surgery. Exactly the same procedure and place as when I had my miscarriage. Despite having my DD with me it's brought back all those horrible memories. DH has taken DD home now, we've all been up since 1am, so I can get some rest. Feeling awful that she's not with me despite knowing I need to put my recovery first and that she's absolutely fine with her daddy.

Who's next on the list now? Hope you're all keeping well and managing the anxiety.

Lovely to hear from you north but sounds like you've had a rough time of it. You said it yourself, you need to recover and dd will be completely fine, just concentrate on getting better for tonight, I'm sure you'll miss her loads but she will need mum to be fully recovered so that you can both have lots of adventures! Get well soon

And from the stats list, going by those who have been posting on here recently it looks like you're up next rebeccaelizabeth!

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