August 2008: Six Month Milestones and More

[TwilightSurfer]

You do remember rightly VG. The deal was that I would try and keep my cool weeknights, and he would not shout at me, and would help more at weekends. I'm keeping my part of the bargain...

Oh Ann your DP can be an arse at times can't he . I can't offer any wise words I'm afraid, just sympathy.

Crap night here too, although not as bad as yours. DS up at 2 then at 4 was wide awake so I brought him into bed. Didn't go back to sleep till 5 then up at 6 and 7. Have to go to work today [wail] but I'm soooo tired. Still, looks like a nice day, I expect a shower and some fresh air will perk me up

Miamla that bag is so pretty, it shows the hearts off really well. You are very clever and all the heart ladies are very clever and VG is very clever for the lovely card

Cyteen good luck in your test today

Better go and get ready [meep]

Annvan - oh dear - you arne't alone, my DH can be just the same. He has got a bit better, but still had the cheek to moan he was tired even though he had a full week of full nights sleeps while I was in England with lil one. Boys can be arses can't they?

Our good news is that the landlord of the flat we want agreed to the first months rent free in lieu of us doing the decorating work. We are going to strip manky wallpaper from sitting room and kitchen and then paint everything white.

You all did such a good job on the tent that I am now requiring your input on our blank canvass (though have a feeling DH will not be going for purple flock or tiger print wallpaper) sigh.

VG it's not so much aboutthe sleep. I know that I have to do the nights. BUT he shouldn't be shouting at me for being tired in the morning. Infact I'm not really sure WHY he started shouting at me, apart from the fact that I sighed and had a little groan. I've given him a good night's sleep, he should at least not shout at me (seeing as he obviously isn't going to spare me any sympathy)

Thanks VG. Maybe that is it. I will have a mature adult discussion with him this evening. I want to know why he shouted, but also make it clear that it's not on.

I was talking about arses mens' night time reactions with DH yesterday.
I hate when I have been up an hour with the baby that I feel that I can't ask him for help because he will have a big grump and huff and puff and say things like "well if you did it properly I wouldn't have to get up"
So it is easier to not wake him up and just think evil thoughts. Though the tricky fella does occassionaly realise that I have been up for ever and gets up to help of his own accord.

I think there is something about us being tired and worn out and having a bit of a cry that generates a not very helpful reaction from some men.

After I have thought evil thoughts about him I also try and remembr that he has lots of worries at the mo and in the cold light of day he is really rather lovely.

In one of the books I have it says that if you are BFing then the fella should help by taking the baby when you have finished and putting it back to sleep. Does anyones DH do this? I think it is a myth or perhaps the writers having a laugh.

Oh ann . Nothing to add to the wise words already offered except that that Seb's nightime wakefulness will pass... I suspect that you won't have trouble getting him to stay in bed at 6am when he's 17. For now, though, maintaining your relationship is vital for your sanity and happiness. You've got a good bargain, you're keeping to it and he needs to be reminded of that? I know I can't really spout on this one given that I've been blessed with two good sleepers but we had a situation similar to yours a few weeks ago when I'd had a really shitty afternoon with both girls whining/tantruming/screaming and when he came in what I really needed was some sympathy, a cuddle and 10 minutes to walk round the block and let my shoulders down from around my ears. Instead I got a tirade of 'I don't know why you're so grumpy, I've been at work all day, you've just been at home, how hard can it be, this is what you wanted blah, blah, blah' It ended with me in floods of tears and drinking too much . Anyhoo, we sat down for a chat and agreed to renew our good-will pact. Hope you can do the same. With the weekend coming up, will you have a bit of quality time together? And if all else fails, he can always do all the night-time stuff for the next two nights.

Good luck cyteen! I won't even start on my many driving test experiences. Far too embarrassing in nature, number and range. I got there in the end though .

Just wanted to say all the hearts,bag and card are just wonderful.

ann for you. You do not deserve to be shouted at at all over anything tbh. I hope he apologises tonight. You are doing a great job, and as someone else said early you got hardly any sleep when pregnant, so my heart goes out to you. I am very very tired this week, but I don't know how you do it.
to you.

cyteen hope you get on ok.

dizzy I am always in the mood for shopping in fact it makes me feel better [shallow emoticon]
hope your dd has had no more bad nappies or sickness. bless her.
hotter for you going in to work on a rough night too.

i am off to get a new hair do now, so will be swishing in later. prob after 7 when kids in bed and dh gone to nightshift. so I will get no anti mn from dh. (I am with you on that one vg)

I too have been accused of doorstepping .

...these red noses are everywhere

steaky mine will get up and bring me Dylan after a sharp poke to waken him but thats the end of the involvement he does realise how lucky he is that I do it all BUT he works such long/changing shifts and because of his job I'd rather he was well rested and had his wits about him

not a great night here either but at least DH was in Ireland so I had whole bed to sprawl share with Dylan - who is of course now back in bed zzzzzing away confining DD2 and I to the house on a lovely sunny day - shall blow off the cobwebs this afternoong

cyteen good luck today, I managed to pass first time but am convinced it was only because my beloved great aunt had a stroke the day before and I drove round thinking 'feck it, there are more important things going on right now' may be a very strange coping strategy for nerves but it worked at that moment in time

VG thank you, I know exactly what you're saying, it needs a lot of thought as there are benefits to both. It I help the committee and end up with a job then I don't have to be borrowing money to start up and basically gambling on a business I've never done before BUT I may also end up bogged down in the formalities and become frustrated. Shall continue to help on a voluntary basis to get a feel for it all at least, it will only benefit us in the long run either way so no harm done if I decide to runforthefeckinghillsawayfromit not get involved

poppy hope sun is shining for you too

another doorstepper here too although have to admit I'm worse as our kitchen window looks out onto the front path so I'm right there waiting on him

no1 she seems absolutely fine this morning thank you, we're sitting watching Cinderella as she seems to have take a liking to all the princesses she's going from Shrek to princesses and back again and back once more all in about 3 days - and I mean books as well here, I don't sit her in front of the telly for days on end

I fear I'm loving these red nose day smileys a LITTLE too much

VG I missed it too, why is everything I LOVE on a thurs night shall endeavour to find out if it is repeated - or can you get onto the BBC Iplayer thingy?

My DH hasn't got up in the night since the early days of DS1 as this nice man turns into an evil person with no sleep. Many casualties were taken in the time it took us to realise it was better for him to sleep at night and then do the early morning shift instead. But that is a fair deal and we stick to it-if I got criticised for the way I did my bit I would find it very hard to take.

I deal with the night stuff however I see fit. The odd time I dissolve into meeping, he gets up and holds DD2 until I can breathe straight and take her back. He doesn't get to criticise ...

You are so right just to say to him calmly that this isn't on. He can't know what it feels like to be the 'buck stops' person in the middle of the night and so he hasn't felt that crumbling feeling that hits you occasionally and makes you wail. And you are 'working' to support your family. If he doesn't see that as work, he has to change his views sharpish.

Can I just muck about with the comic relief icons: [smile}

Sun present and correct here too Dizzy. Have been sitting here squinting at the laptop screen while it streams in through the windows, so shall now go out and enjoy it.

Apprentice thing last night was really just a taster for denouement tonight I think VG. Jonathon Ross in his element designing a toy for 5-8 yr old, Gok Wan and Alan Carr bitching at each other and Patsy Palmer and Michelle Mone having a bitch fight par excellence was what I got from it whilst also MNing and chatting on the phone .

oh and I wanted to say thank you all again for your kind words after my mini-meltdown yesterday I have a tendency to worry about other people's opinion too much and over think things so not having DH here to rein me in a bit made it worse, when I told him how kind you'd all been he laughed and said thank goodness someone was looking out for me when I was in neurotic mode

Major cross-posting from me.

I wonder if there is a way for me to download it and email you it then? shall have a look - am not above a bit of fraud in the name of comic relief

I am more myself thank you, I heard last night that my first boyfriend's mother died suddenly on Dec 30th last year and that put it all slap bang in place. She was a truely lovely lady who always made me feel a very welcome part of her family and she leaves behind 5 devestated kids, their partners and all 11 grandkids

makes my little run in seem all very petty and trivial