Just Mumming Viroids 6 - some of us have time for JSing, some don't, but we're all grad grads!

[JuniDD]

Just shagging grad grads thread! Roll call below please...

Totally get this too pis. I really hate being the default parent, I feel like I've got him all day every day, then at the weekends dh helpfully suggests taking ds1 to the cinema or something that we can't do!

I got upset last time he suggested everyone expect O and me go to the cinema, said id not been in ages. His suggestion! We go to baby cinema Tuesday morning. Ourselves. Whoop ducking whoop

I say second baby is different. Easier in that it's not a shock and you cope with sleep deprivation better. But worse in that you actually get far less sleep and have no chance of recovery at any point in the day.

Pis that's not really on that he won't take the responsibility. My friend maintains you have to just leave and let them get on with it or they'll never bother to learn how to do it all. But know what you mean about wanting a break. I have been to the hairdressers once and on short shopping trips a couple of times but that's all in 6 1/2 months. Haven't been able to leave for more than three hours because of the bottle situation. I can see light at the end of the tunnel now solids are starting but it's been tough. And still have to try to get her to bed before about 8.45 so i could actually go out in the evening for a bit. Sorry this is a bit moany but if I vent it stops me getting the rage with people who have bottle-accepting babies and access to babysitters. Oh and babies who sleep. Hitting 12lbs didn't do a thing here I'm afraid.

Supposed to be leaving house in an hour and we're all sitting in jammies having breakfast. Never going to happen.

La swaddling is amazing!

Oh la I totally get the crying whilst holding your baby situation. It's awful! I have been tear free for the past few days and so think it's just the baby blues and I hope they have passed.

S is cluster feeding at the moment too - during the day I have been feeding him every two hours (and each feed takes an hour) in the hope that he fills up during the day. It worked yesterday as he went to bed at 9pm and only got up at 12.30 and 5am for feeds. That extra bit of sleep was amazing.

Dog was there again last night, DH is going to speak to the guy next door (they were out last night) - he has his mobile number and so will ring him. I wouldn't mind but S didn't make a peep last night bless him (I think he is fed up of the dog too).

Oh and yy to swaddling in this house

I think we didn't know that stuff about the car seat is because we bought it online, any way I am glad I know now! And to whoever asked yup I do know about the sunshade!

I loved swaddling E when he was little bit it only lasted a couple of weeks, he was pesky newborn! But adorable so i forgive him

Thanks viroids. I feel bad for complaining because he is very good and wants to do stuff with/for her. He's just never done it on his own. I know I'm part of the problem too - for example if he is doing her morning change then I pick out her clothes for the day otherwise he might pick out, say, the dungarees and a t-shirt that isn't the one that goes with the dungarees. Shit like that doesn't really matter but I can't let it be! I know I am also very lucky that she will take a bottle. I was tamping about the unsterilised bottle though - I'd put everything in the steriliser and all he needed to do was put it on. I guess that if I'm alway doing this stuff for him it's no surprise he doesn't think to do it for himself.

I know what you mean about being the default parent Kato. He's away during the week and will often arrange things with his friends for the weekend like a bike ride or whatever. I don't mind him doing stuff like that obviously but he would never think to check if I've made plans.

Anyway enough whining - BabyPis is giving me her best sunshine grins and I've a load of packing to do so best make a coffee and some breakfast and get going!

Haha Pis - that sounds exactly like me re the clothes etc!! I'm the default parent too. Mr P is getting a little better but massive unclenching is required on my part....

I've got a no bottle accepting/ no babysitters forthcoming baby too Wil

My dh sterilised the breast pump and bottle the other day in the solution, then 'rinsed it out using tap water'

I had to explain we now couldn't use it and it had to be sterilised again

Pis and Kato your guys definitely need to understand it's wonderful but also suffocating being tied to these babies by bf or being the default parent. I envy my dh for being able to go in the shower and not come out to me handing him a baby saying 'he needs feeding'. I like my space and can imagine it's going to get me down a bit too

I just slept another 2 hours. Seriously - can you swaddle them until they are 18?

I can absolutely get on board with an isolated feeling. I already feel a bit stuck. I haven't even brushed my teeth this morning. J didn't nap in the day yesterday really and today seems to be going a similar way. I do feel a bit lonely and isolated. At the moment I would look forward to working a bit. That might be harsh... Trying to think about activities we have coming up like hen dos, weddings, my birthday and I now appreciate how restricted I am. DH not so much. It's got to be a big downside of BFing.

Ds1 was saddled til 5months! We use a miracle blanket x

Think you can swaddle until the moro reflex stops? Or until they can roll over? MiniP would never be swaddled... little goit.

It is a massive downside of breastfeeding Dulce. I've been feeling a bit down about it this week, not even getting evenings to myself this week due to 3 hour bedtimes... Boobing to sleep and only mummy will do phase. Its exhausting. As they get a bit older though the need for boob becomes less immediate... they can be distracted by Daddy for longer.

Crawling! Why does my child automatically gravitate to the nearest thing most likely to kill or maim him!? I didn't sign up for a mobile infant

Definitely get on fb and look for local sling groups, baby groups etc, children's centres, breastfeeding groups, libraries, free classes! I have issues with social anxiety and have a real tendency towards sitting around feeling sorry for myself and getting depressed.... I've had to be really tough on myself and force myself to get out the house and do things with the baby to avoid getting isolated and potential PND... I know I sound like a frigging stuck record but getting out the house makes all the difference.

This time of year is awkward as lots of stuff stops for school holidays but in a few weeks there'll be activities non stop. I've been a bit housebound lately as can't be arsed with other people ate but looking forward to library singing again soon.

I hear you on the crawling, no more leisurely sit downs for me.

Gonna take a little mn break for a bit, see you on the next thread xx

Hope all's ok Juni xxx

Hope you're ok Juni, much love xx

I never asked La, I take it MiniLa's hips are ok?

Definitely get out - even for a walk if you're up to it physically. We spent a breezy morning at the park and it definitely stops me falling into the abyss for another day!

It's not just BF that makes you feel isolated, just had a row with Mr furry about how trapped I feel. His whole 'I can't do it I don't know how' way of parenting is starting to piss me off.

Hope you're ok juni

Wil - he'll be scanned at 6 weeks.

Hope you're ok juni xxx

Just catching up, appreciate the BF trapped thing; TT is refusing his expressed milk in any bottle now, I had a two hour dental horror show this afternoon and I left him with my mum and the little sod cried with hunger but wouldn't take the milk from cup, bottle or otherwise. It's really hard explaining how restrictive it is to people that haven't been close to, or have done the whole ebf thing themselves, my in laws are an excellent example of wanting to Take him For the day or overnight, (over my dead body) or take him off my hands so I can nap, but it's completely unrealistic; I don't know if the 8week leap involves cluster feeding, but we seem to have only had a week of non cluster feeding to be back at all morning and all evening boobage. Managed to get him to sleep in Snuzpod two hours again last night and the night feeds are spacing out, pretty much 1.30am, 4am last few nights. Going to be all over the place tonight though, had partial root canal earlier which isn't going to plan, so the nerve that is giving me untold grief couldn't be removed because the anaesthesia wasn't touching it, so I've had the tooth packed with some kind of death juice to try and kill the nerve instead. Fuck me, I feel like I've been repeatedly beaten in the jaw with a spade, so I've taken some co codamol and hoping it doesn't upset TT too much; I stopped taking it after delivery as it would make him sleepy and floppy but then really agitated when he woke up. I'm also sure it reduced my supply for a while, but I am in pain!

Will read back now...

Ouch tee!! I hope it's sorted soon

Oh Tee that sounds dreadful. Aside from childbirth, dental pain is the sorest thing. Hope the cocodamol does the trick.

How did MrScoob react to that Furry. You're right, it's not a bfing thing. It's just a mum thing if you're not getting any help.

Micro only just settled now the wee minx. She hasn't fed much today so I'm expecting a busy night.

What do you all wear in bed bra wise? I'm getting sick of wearing a proper full bra but not convinced those vest type ones would hold up my norks?

Ooof tee that sounds horrific Sympathies.

Ah scoob - I get that guff from MrP as well. xx