March 2013 time for shoes!

[Plonkysaurus]

New thread ladies...

Morning Yummy! Glad to hear you're surviving work, even if it is baby steps at the moment. I remember the feeling that my brain was dripping out of my ears but I promise it gets better! Hope things are sorted with your DM soon.

Pud thanks for the back up. We've got some nappy rash this morning (teething related I think) so I'm taking cloth. DP is horrified, natch.

Stormy is there a sexual health clinic in Hull? They might be more help. I was able to book an appointment for the right time in my cycle (cervix still open at the end of period I think, though Betty may correct me). Apparently this makes it less painful? Anyway, the appointments were difficult to come by as they last about 30 minutes and take a dr and a nurse. Sexual health clinic may be more helpful for you?

I totally know what you mean about feeling like you though. But withdrawal caused me to be constantly on edge!

Stormy if you feel better without the hormones then stay off them but don't risk withdrawal. Things are just getting sorted with the man and building a fragile relationship takes time and effort which is not compatible with pregnancy and a toddler, give yourselves a chance, there's plenty of time for another.

As for getting the coil in Hull by far the best place is the community gynaecology service which is called Conifer. They do loads of them and are all gynae rather than GP trained it was one of them I got to do my mirena. You can self-refer and you have a consultation appointment and then a fitting appointment.

conifer

We're having our NCT joint first birthday party today so I've been baking up a storm all morning and now DH and I are having a cup of tea and steeling ourselves for spending the afternoon with 8 mobile babies over nap time!

Yummy I think grandparents as childcare is brilliant for some people but I know it wouldn't work for me, it would change my relationship with my DM I think so I know how you feel. Would all of your wages go on childcare? If they would, would your career be progressing during that time to a point where either you would be earning more or more flexible in a few years or would you be able to take a few years out with little impact? I have a few friends that pay to go to work btu with the knowledge that it will only be like that short term, they want to work anyway and their careers would take a hit if they didn't continue now.

Eco long legs is definitely my best feature too. DH says I'm like a midget on stilts he knows how to charm the ladies

Thanks for the link, Betty. I'll investigate once DD's in bed.

stormy step away from the withdrawal method. There is a risk of pregnancy unless you want to get pregnant. I know what you mean about not wanting hormonal contraception. I would have went for the copper coil but was scared of the heavy periods. Im stuck with the mirena although, dare i say that the stomach cramps and the irregular bleeding has calmed down now. So everyone reacts to hormones differently.

betty Its a tough one because social workers are always needed and I have worked front line for a respectable number of years so I am not too worried about not finding a job after a break. However, in the year that I left little things like not having the same desk, seeing other people had progressing, new colleagues in the office made me feel like I missed a lot. I do like the balance of working part time so maybe the nursery fees are worth it for my sanity.

plonky I have never used cloth so I am going to ask you and all the cloth users a silly question. Changing pooey disposable nappies are a challenge as it is (ie the smell in between changing him and throwing the nappy bag out). How do you stomach cleaning pooey cloth nappies?

As I understand it, yummy, one scrapes the lumps straight down the loo. The nappy is then thrown into an airtight bucket and left there until ready for washing, at which point one dons a gas mask. Happy to be corrected though!

Okay, okay, withdrawal = bad. I shall resist.

Gas mask not required too much - nappies are in mesh bag in bucket and go into wash in said bag - they work their way out during the wash - so no touching required. As poo dropped down the loo (generally flicks off very easily) the not as much to smell ... It's much cleaner. Plus as you tend to wash every couple of days the it doesn't 'stew' as long as a sposie in a bin bag - which get grim!

Slightly horrified at the notion of leaving a binliner full of disposable nappies lying around for days! Ours go into a scented nappy bag (200 for 23p, god bless Wilko's) and get dumped on top of the washing machine until they're put in the wheelie bin before bed. Absolute stinkers get thrown out immediately.

DD is eating real, healthy food, that I cooked! Wonders will never cease.

Hello everyone, what a beautiful day it is.

Plonky great rack you say? tell us about the house! Link? I love other people's house searches, just not my own.

Betty how was the joint party? Early to bed tonight I bet!

Yummy I imagine that change in the workplace was most disconcerting? I say stick with it and nursery sounds like recipe for happier life. Don't jeapordise your relationship with dm.

Stormy the very thought of my beefy hairy dh in lace is frankly terrifying and hilarious in equal measure. Not a sexy thought for me. But men have different qualities and it's good the man looks good in lace for you. Each to her own

Worse I'm sure the bin is just an inconvenience but having people tramping around your property is just yuck. I say set up a booby trap. Back in the seventies my Dad did just that for a peeping tom. It involved a man hole cover. I'm from dodgy stock.

Ecotod loves gnocci. I think it's rank. The texture! Anyhow, she puts a wjole one in does a cursory chomp and then swallows in one. How is that even possible? I tried and I needed at the vey least 8 chews with my mouth full of teeth. I'm discovering her strengths in life.

We have second viewed 2 houses today. I'll zip onto right move and link to them. Anyone with any thoughts I'd be pleased to hear them.

Sending warm sunny bird song filled smiles to you all.

Unless you have a rightmove fetish don't read on. Nowt baby related to see here!

clophill This is a 1930s semi. It is a total mess right now but has a nice big kitchen. It needs new boiler, new kitchen, new bathroom, carpets ripping out, extensive work in the garden and a ruddy good deep clean. It has dodgy access because it's set on a bank. There is no garage (but there are brick built outbuildings for camping stuff and bikes) or off street parking but you can park easily outside and there's plenty of space. The garden is delicious. It slopes upwards and is next to a small woodland to one side. It has views of undulating countryside. It's a massive garden. There's only one bathroom/toilet. It faces south so the kitchen is dark ish. Clophill is very very naice, but it's a village so services wise there's 2 restaurants, a very nice drinking pub, a shop and a hairdresser. You can hear some road noise. It's a fair way to a larger town (Bedford) for 'stuff' like baby music/swimming/yoga. This one is closer to my family who live in Leicestershire.

heath and reach This is a 50s (?) semi bungalow created for old people which looks tiny from outside. It is in a cul de sac and backs onto allotments. You can hear some road noise. It has a great kitchen that with french doors in would be perfect. The bedrooms a small and a bit quirky (not in a great way) but once has an ensuite toilet and basin (with no door!). Garden is small but nice and practical and easily accessible for children. There is a double length garage. The nearby countryside is awesome; two country parks with cafes, a national nature reserve, the grand union canal, within 1 mile or two. This is a totally different area to the other one and is on the edge of the Chilterns. This is 2 miles away from Leighton Buzzard/Linslade where there will be yummy mummy type activities I suspect. This is closer to my closest friend who lives in Berks.

Both would be without any financial input from me, just based on DH's salary to give us no massive pressure on needing 2 decent salaries and therefore a bit of flexibility. Decent schools at both. I am currently veering between the two very passionately. Neither are 'perfect'. I realise I am in a lucky position being able to choose between the two and know I can trust our PN group not to remind me that people in Rio are living in favelas.

If you have got this far thank you. It was useful to sum it all up on screen to clear my head a little.

Eco it depends what your short and long term priorities are.

1. Long term has great potential for adding value as both the house and garden could with the benefit of time, money and tlc be improved massively. However short term is going to be a bit of a headache as renovation projects are not for the faint hearted. That said if you are going to be at home to project manage and have the budget, now might be as good a time as any.

1. Short term I think you'd be happier as it's more of a home, in a lovely environment with more for you and ecotod to do. There's less potential for adding value in the long term though.

One question, would this be your forever home, or do you envisage moving again in the future? For a forever home I'd go for 1. on the basis is you are less likely to out grow it. If not I'd go for 2. as it would give you a comfortable easy option, with minimal work and maximum potential for making new friends.

Ultimately only you can decide though as you'll get a gut feel that will tell you which is the one.

wise words worse. Nothing like some alliteration for a Saturday night.

Very valid points. It won't be our forever home no. And the second probably does suit this next stage very well whilst we are trying to put down social roots. My head errs on the side of the second one. There's just a chunk of my heart in that bird song filled garden full of primroses.....
Thanks for sharing your thoughts worse. We can all resume normal business now.

Back to coils, confidence, child care, withdrawal and lace pants!

eco I say 2nd too if it isn't your forever home. Lovely kitchen.

Happy mothering Sunday everyone

No 2 gives more time for life. No 1 is a big project. If you're not looking for forever home or not desperate for max added value/projecty-ness then I'd go 2. I know nothing about areas.

Happy sexy bastard day everyone! Especially for those if us having our first.

Happy 1st and 2nd mother's days to all you wonderful mothers!

And eco I'm another vote for the 2nd. Love that kitchen!

Happy Mothers Day one and all! It still feels weird.... being 'a mum'. Wonderful weird but weird none the less. I'm a bit as DH forgot. He remembered it was coming up last week and gave me some chocolates early, but today he forgot. It shouldn't matter, but it does.

Right I need some Nancy Drew (if you're old enough to remember) style sleuthing. Our bin has been returned . I heard some noise outside in the wee small hours but figured it wasn't anything to worry about as we have fort knoxed the security.... but someone obviously wheeled it back down the road and left it outside. It must have been a neighbour. But why???????

Eco I say number two because it's ready. Some cosmetic work and you're done. And friends wise, well it's just down the m1 so slightly ambitious day trip distance for me and something. Ooh and here's my hopeful home with a silly address. Very much a new build box but it would suit us very well.

yummy pooey nappies are flicked loo-wards. I pop a flushable liner in before I put a clean nappy on ds so they're a minimum mess. I don't store dirty ones in a bucket though, as ds got very curious about it. They go in a waterproof bag until there's enough to warrant a wash, which I do 2 or 3 times a week. I use washable wipes as well and find there's a lot less contact with poo.

We spent last night at the in laws and are currently en route to my sisters for a Mother's Day lunch. Roast pork, I can't wait! Although ds definitely appears to have eczema, thank goodness there's a dr in the family we can text photos to. We have the mmr on Wednesday so I'm hoping to show it to a nurse then, and keep popping cream on in the mean time.

Worse I know the toddleworse has suffered in the past - what was the trigger? We're expecting to have to experiment with wheat/dairy etc.

ooh I think you need to take the same approach as Clarkson regarding your night time visitor. I bloody detest him usually, but he combatted a fox stealing his chickens by sitting atop the house, accompanied by rifle and whiskey. I can picture you doing this.

Plonky before you start messing about with food elimination try to reduce all contact with soaps, washing powders, and synthetic fibres etc as those are the triggers here.

Use non-bio washing powder and double rinse clothes and towels

Wash and double rinse all new clothes before wearing

Cotton clothes only, avoid polyester

Clean the bath out with a cloth and hot water before use, every time

No baby bath bubble/oils, soaps, body washes, just warm water and a flannel. The bath sponge was also an irritant so we ditched that.

Aveeno cream all over after bathing, also first thing in morning, last thing at night, and at nappy changes. Oilatum is a waste of time. It made no difference at all here.

Reduce baths to once every 3 days at most. If I bathed dd every day her skin would bleed.

Give it a few days, and be really diligent about the cream. Hopefully you'll see an improvement.

Happy mothers' day, all. Haven't even seen DD yet today, except for a diabolical nappy change at 6.30 this morning. And I didn't notice the clocks changing because I didn't get up until half past noon. Bliss!

Happy mothers everyone!

Wow Worse thanks for the tips. My gut thinking was that it was an over bathing thing exacerbated by illness, so I'll definitely follow your advice.

I have a very tired, clingy, feeling-sorry-for-himself little rascal this mother's day. Teeth 14 and 15 have put in an appearance and they're the fangs. None of us are happy about them! Especially DS, he hates the world.

Gah. DH has done it again. Cards - one from him and one from DD. No flowers. Nothing. I bought flowers for his mum and my mum yesterday as he 'didn't have time' so i said 'doesn't bode well for me then' and he said i was talking in riddles. Had a lovely day with all Mums and family, celebrated his birthday and once everyone had gone he asked 'what's the matter?' Told him was miffed about no flowers. Apparently, that's unreasonable and now we're not talking. WHYYYYYYY? WTF? He works hard and gets paid money. I work hard and want to be paid with one lousy bunch of flowers. He forgot to get his Mum some last year (2 weeks after giving birth) so I let her have mine. Reminded him of such this week. Have I really married a f*ckwit? He never used to be this bad. Aaaaaarrrrrgggghhhh.

Rant over. Oh, here they are

That's shite Any. I hope he takes this time to go and have words with himself. Here's some flowers from me cos you're a star and deserve them.

On the other hand I've just logged in to Facebook to see a status saying her kids gave her a Mother's Day present organized by the woman her husband cheated on her with. 2 days before she had a baby. Quite a shocking reminder to count blessings and be glad etc.

Your husband has it easy in comparison! I'd still be tempted to make him sleep on the settee mind.