March 2013 time for shoes!

[Plonkysaurus]

New thread ladies...

[ www.rightmove.co.uk/new-homes-for-sale/property-42827860.html look familiar plonky] I like you house there plonk. Practical. Garage, spare room for more babies/family visitors/me when I've had enough of bloody Bedfordshire. Space to eat in kitchen. Sexy love chamber at top of house well away from all else with en suite so no need for penis beaker. Good solid bet I say. Only thing you'll find is that garden will be mean. Depends what you want from a garden and what you've got at present, forewarned is forearmed. Do you like my identical house round here where we're looking? Bit different on price. And derby is much much nicer!

Any . it's a sucky day to argue. I like your comment about him working hard and getting paid money and you working hard and wanting an annual bunch of flowers. Reasonable! It sounds like he's crap generally with that sort of thing. Would he respond favourably if you sat down when you feel less and explain how this makes you feel....under valued, unappreciated, lonely in your parenting pursuit? Good luck with trying to sort it. It's never nice going to bed on cross words for either party. Quick cuddle to clear the air and discuss tomorrow? Worse will know what to do.

Mothers day turned a bit here but we had a totally cry free bath time, dressing and bedtime with lots of smiles and cuddles which was lovely. I love her so much.

something 15 teeth yikes! We only have 6. Hope ds gets over the teething pain so he can enjoy his full set of teeth.

any I think yanbu. Make a big fuss this year so he definitely remembers next year or do what I do. Remind him of special days 3 days before.

plonky I love the house. I do prefer new builds but the gardens are usually small. However, sometimes we have to make compromises.

We had a lovely day. Yummy breakfast followed by a lovely day at the park. No flowers here but dh bought me earrings and a card so bonus points to him. I can't wait for ds to make me handmade cards when he's older.

Have I killed the thread?

Any I feel your pain, as DH forgot entirely. No card... no 'Happy Mother's Day', nada... and when I said I was upset he got really cross because he had bought chocolates, last week. It's put me on edge to be honest as one of the things he did when he stopped caring before was forget my birthday every year, without fail. He's busy sure, but if he can remember what country he supposed to be in and when, and who he is meeting and why, I figure the odd celebratory card might not be so terribly hard. So, all a bit miserable here.

That said the poor bloke is knackered, jet lagged, stressed over my health and the toddleworse's heart murmur (he checks she is breathing about 10 times a night), and in my opinion on the point of a heart attack himself, so this year I think I'll let him off. If it happens again mind... it's curtains

Something 15 teeth! Wow. Your lad is going to be leaving home soon at this rate. 8 here, plus fangs showing, and that is quite enough for the time and being thank you. When she bites it hurts!

Oh I do like a bit of property porn, it almost makes me wish I was moving myself. DH scared me a bit the other week when he discovered some run down estate on a remote Scottish Island going for a song, and thought it would be an excellent idea for us to move there and set up a hotel/Spa type place. I was almost tempted until the reality of living a helicopter ride away from civilisation hit me. Plus we don't have and never will have a helicopter! Fortunately some other mug person bought it first, so now all I have to contend with is his current desire to retire to the South of France where apparently we would 'enjoy' renovating another mouldy old heap. Like h*ll....

Not much else to report today. Stormy fingers crossed dd is up for some more home made food. You do realise though, that whatever it was she really liked last time will be poison today don't you?!

Oh yes, before I forget I think we have solved the mystery of the wheelie bin. I have a slightly unusual neighbour, and I suspect she might have borrowed for gardening or something. She's a bit (in MN speak) entitled, but has enough of a conscience to bring it back.

Hugs worse, and Any. There's no excuse for forgetting mothers' day when one has access to a calendar. Fortunately the man didn't forget, but if he had, I would be explaining that it doesn't matter a jot whether he thinks the day is important, what matters is that I do. If he knows that and chooses not to mark the day regardless, he's showing a lack of respect for my feelings that I won't tolerate. Reminds me of a conversation we had the other day, in which I explained, very carefully and in simple words, that my thoughts and feelings, even if they're in opposition to his, are just as valid, just as true, as his thoughts and feelings, and by being dismissive simply because he disagrees isn't just disrespectful, it's also effectively implying I'm lesser than him. And I think he finally understood.

As for real food, DD ate it again! Saturday was normal and sweet potato mashed with corned beef and cheese. Last night was ravioli with pancetta and cheese sauce. Tonight I'm trying sweet potato mash and sausages. Wish me luck!

Stormy can you come over here and explain that to dp? I think he's starting to get it, but it takes a lot of coercion.

There's another conversation you need to have first, Plonk, in which you outline the difference between what he thinks you said and the words you actually used. Took a lot of effort to get the man to grasp that if I say xyz, I have considered my words carefully and do in fact mean xyz.

To all you lovely lot. Wors and Any, Stormy has been much more articulate than I could have been but I'd have scalped DH if he'd forgotten. Thankfully he didn't but I did have to remind him again while he was sitting reading the newspaper while having his breakfast & I was trying to butter the last slice of toast for myself while juggling barking dog and screaming DD! Luckily he redeemed himself with dinner.

I was really looking forward to going for a curry with friends tonight but the dreaded vomiting bug has struck. It's no fun chucking up while trying to keep an eye on a very mobile madam and dog and as throwing up curry is also no fun it looks like a night in my PJs on the sofa is called for!

What's with all the sickness we're sharing about at the moment?

How's everyone doing this fine, grey, drizzly Monday?

Thaaanks worse stormy plonky and betty - Love being able to vent to those what understand. DH has fully redeemed himself by coming home with a bouquet (that he got made by a florist, not just the half price ones from Tesco) and apologised that DD couldn't get out before and I should have had them yesterday. I had told him that I was hurt so it must have worked!

Here, let me share on Moaning Monday (?)

Oh and sorry betty for the nirovirus - had it, didn't enjoy it, wouldn't wish it on anyone. Here

Er, NOROvirus.

Thanks Any but thankfully I'm pretty sure it's not Noro, I've had that twice when the wards I worked on came down with it. I didn't leave the bathroom for 48hrs (even slept in there) and thought death might have been the kinder option. Thankfully this just seems like a vomiting bug, still not nice but could definitely be more miserable!

I'm glad DH pulled his finger out and got your flowers, they're much deserved!

Betty you're so awesome. There you are all 'pfft it's just vomit' while looking after a toddler (a boob monster at that), an excitable dog and a paper reading dh! That's nothing short of heroic.

Have some .

And a when you're up to it.

Hope the vom fairy flies away soon Betty!

Thanks Plonk & Pud! No more vomming overnight so hopefully departed, although I feel pretty sorry for myself still today. It's amazing how just a day of being sick takes it out of you, no wonder I was so knackered when I was pregnant.

DH has just left to drop DD off for her first day at nursery and I'm sad. I know she has to go & I'm sure she'll enjoy bits of it in time but she'll be there for 11hrs a session which just seems far too much for a baby. Mind you if she's anything like the other nursery babies she'll be throwing a sickie by Thursday and snuggled up at home again!

Betty Toddleworse loved her first few days at nursery. After a while she worked out she was going to be left and started kicking up a stink at drop off.... but only when I was in sight. As soon as I left the room she was all smiles. It'll be fine, don't worry but do prepare yourself for snot

Toddleworse is actually supposed to be going back to nursery herself today, but it is DH's birthday and he's taken the day off so she's skiving. Again. The staff will forget what she looks like at this rate!

Sunny here, hope it is with you, and all vomiting is a thing of the past.

betty hope you are feeling better today. Im sure dd will love nursery. When they are away from you giving them a big hug at the end of the day is the best thing ever.

worse enjoy your family day. Birthdays are a great excuse to skive from work/nursery and eat cake.

I am nursery searching and didn't realise how expensive it is. Over £600 a month for 3 days per week. Prices vary between £51-57 per day. If you don't mind me asking how much do you all pay for nursery? I wondered if this was London or all childcare across the uk this pricey. So it is either suck it up yummy and try to get along with dm, pay the nursery fees with most of your salary or give up working.

I hope you are all enjoying the lovely weather.

Yummy can you get any assistance with tax credits? It's worth finding out - I thought there was no way we would qualify, but apparently it's based on the previous year's income. As I was on maternity leave for the majority of that, and they deduct £100 a week from the total for every week of mat leave, we now get £160 a month in childcare tax credits. And we're on decent wages (outside of london). I pay £37 a day, but DP is having a pay review at work today. If the assistance disappears completely we will claim childcare vouchers and I will put him in for short days (£24 for 8.30-2pm, I think) and cram work in during the evenings/weekends. Childcare vouchers/tax credits are well worth looking into.

Betty she'll be rate, I promise! DS loves nursery. Of course, we had the pulling-sickies experience early on, but he's so well bonded with his keyworker that I have no qualms. The little people catch every bug going and it's no reflection on nursery whatsoever. He comes home stinking of milton, but I still love that big squeeze and breathing him all in. Glad the vom fairy has done one for now. I saw an idiot driving a car with a sticker on the back today. The sticker said 'Powered by fairy dust', and thanks to this thread I found myself wondering if it was the vom fairy. You lot!

Yummy I meant to add.... You say your salary, but remember it's household income. DH also pays! So look at it from that perspective. It sounds like you really like your job and don't really want more of a career break. That's got to be a family decision and shouldn't be solely based on money. Have a love.

I pay 43 a day, but if we have to go ft for a bit (don't ask dh pt working request rejected god knows what we do) then they have a discount so it drops to just under 37. Includes all food, milk and nappies - though I still put him in cloth green martyr.

Yy to Plonky's comment on household income though. It's not just your job to look after him. As his parents you BOTH need to ensure he's cared for if you are at work. Often there's a couple if years when you pay to keep your career on track, but that's a valid decision. ?

You are right plonky. Tax credits have said they will pay for some of the childcare. Yep totally its household income not just my salary. I said it to myself like that to put it in context. Iyswim. I love to work and really struggled being at home full time. For me part time has been the perfect balance. Ds is absolutely a joy to be with. I love this age. He makes me laugh. Also its nice to go to work and not be a mum for most of the 2/3 days of the week. Eventually I will go back to work full time if we want to be on the property ladder but not just yet. At the moment part time working suits us as a family.

X post pud. You are right too about the income.

I feel the same way, Yummy. I'm struggling to see myself working full time again within the next five years, and it's nice to be in a position of such indulgence and luxury. Ideally I don't want to work full time until baby number two is at school full time. Seeing as I'd like to have a baby in 2015 that means 24 hours a week or less for the next 6 years, and a good chunk of money paid out to nursery.

But this is the balance that works for us as a family, and I'd not swap it for anything.

Like Pud's our nursery provides food, milk, cuddles etc. They really are fantastic. I do send him in with disposable nappies though because I'm not very organised.

Yummy ours is £48 per day but we pay extra for extended hours (7.30-6.30) which is why it's bit more than the other Leeds ones. That's for long day, food and milk but we have to bring in our own nappies.

Would it be better with DM if she did 1 day rather than all 3 so more like a fun day with DS rather than multiple days of childcare or is just looking after him in a formal arrangement and disagreeing about methods of doing things that's making things difficult? I think if you can find a way to stretch to it nursery would probably suit you, especially if it allows you a nice work-life balance. The other thing to look at is a childminder, they're much cheaper round here but unfortunately I couldn't find one to fit in with our hours.

DD did really well. I rang to check at 11.15 and they said she'd spent most of the morning crying and was a bit clingy but when I picked her up this afternoon she'd settled really well, eaten better than she does at home and had a big nap.

Bloody hell, nursery fees are scary. I don't envy you all them one bit!

In better news, DD ate real food again! This continues to be a source of great wonder and joy.