Dec 2008 - Hello 2011 the Year of the Toddler!

[DeidreBarlow]

Totally unispired but hope you all find it...

The poor baby Avo, hope the ABs help her soon. Horrible when they are so hot.

I remember when dd has swine flu, she was so, so hot. I had her in my bed and spent most of the night awake just watching her, she really did feel as though you could fry and egg on her.

Hope the ABs kick in and you get some sleep, Avo. Poor DD1.

Glad you got an answer Avo. Hope dd2 feels better v v soon and you both get some sleep.

Agghh, agggghhhhh, agggggggggghhhhhhhhh. Can't cope. Having obtained antibiotics for DD2 I left her on the care of her father and took DD1 to a drinks party. Spent one full hour with no sick kids hanging off me until DD1 burrs into tears mid party saying her chest was hurting. Got home to find her temp is 40.7!!! Now gave DD2 still v I'll asleep on my chest and DD1 being given a tepid bathy her father. He wants to take her to out if hours again as she says it hurts when she breaths. Oh gosh. 2011 please be nicer to me.

I'm sorry that there have been several posts I've really wanted to give thought to over the last few days but the plague has prevented me. Sybs and JJ I will respond to your (v different) conundrums after me second emergency doctors dash of the day.

Typo central. Bloody predictive text and illiterate author. Think like an iPhone programmer and you might manage to decipher what on earth I'm going on abt.

Oh no! OOH doc might be a plan - do you have to wait around for ages? Could your DH take her while you stay with DD2?

Oh Avo, I am so sorry that the girls are so poorly. Am keeping fingers crossed that you get DD1 sorted soon. When mine are very hot and bothered, I take them into bed with me (having booted DH out) and just let them snooze on me so I can keep a watching eye on temps, breathing etc. Can also watch things on laptop as I tend to them. Can you persuade them to drink? I keep evil squash in the house to use when ill as that way they won't get dehydrated. Am thinking of you and will check in later on to see how they are. Lots of love.

Must pop off to sort out my girls, currently running around like mad things. Back shortly.

Oh no Avo! Your poor girls. What a way to start the year. I hope the fevers stay down overnight. I'm the same as Sybs re: ditching DH out of our bed and bringing DS in with me when he's sick.

The Canada conundrum (sp?) is basically:

Pros: family, space and fresh air, summer house in the woods on a lake, no worries about getting into local state schools, it's what I grew up with

Cons: love London and the UK generally, love my job and could never get such interesting work in Canada, more friends here than Canada now, weekend newspapers and Radio 4, surrounded by history, easy to travel in Europe, North Americans seem more uptight and boring on average than British people

Maybe similar to your Oz dilemna Rubes and Vag?

Poor girlies AVO. Wishing hem a speedy recovery.

Think we might be headed in the same direction. DS2 has an awful barking cough and has only just gone to sleep but sounds very wheezy. Walk in clinic tom I think.

JJ would you be completely opposed to moving to Glasgow? Sounds like it could be a goer for you guys. MOM you sound much happier to be in London than Canada.

Took all the decs down today. Our poor tree was in a right state. Proper crunchy.

Avo I'm very sorry for your house of ills and for the toll.its taking on you. That chest pain for DD1 sounds worrying, has she been coughing at all? She could be quite congested already. It is possible they might want a chest xray if that doesn't settle. I'm very sorry I didn't get on earlier I was halfway through writing a post just after your last post after you went to the GP but my battery died and I had to wait for it to charge. I know you probably don't feel this but you are doing brilliantly, your girls are very ill and you are taking care if them. You are making sure they have everything they need medically and emotionally. Make sure you look after yourself too won't you. Get DH to pop out and get some supplies, crisps and popcorn are good as well as applejuice or squash as Effie suggested. If they will eat anything give them some neurofen either with or betweem the calpol doses. Tepid baths are great but they can't spend the whole day in there. Instead if they will tolerate it put a cool cloth around their necks or under their arms. Putting the coolness on their lymph nodes helps cool the body down.

Oh and Avo I think now is not a good time to be reducing your MN time. Maybe take this as a chance to get to know your iPhone.

Mom I hear you with all your moving home ishoos. We start to talk about it and always come up with a big I DON'T KNOW.

DS2 is driving me crazy today. He is all cuddles with DH and DS1 but with me he is either a screaming demon or demanding milk. He only has a feed now for his nap if he sleeps in his bed, and at bedtime, but I upped his feeds while he was sick before Christmas and now he asks for it all day. It really shows how different kids can be, DS1 had weaned himself by now and I wanted DS2 to do the same when he was ready but as with everything else with this boy he has dug his heels in a is flatly refusing to give up. I think it might be time for me to step in now, he doesn't need the feed to get to sleep he just has the feed then removes himself and settles after he is off. I know its good for him and it continues to be the longer he has it but if I'm starting to feel it is a bit detrimental to our relationship as mum as bub as I'm resenting him.

Oh gosh, Avo, I do hope the girls are ok. Goodness, sounds shocking. Just a quick post as I have been in London and won't be back until tomorrow but smashing to see Rubes yesterday and all complete twaddle about her rambling, it was thoroughly enjoyable. I have been racing round today seeing friends and trip has been wonderful but have hugely missed my DDs. Also there is tons on here I want to respond to when I get back tomorrow. Sweet dreams to all.

Hello,

Well we didn't take DD1 to the doctors as the tepid bath, calpol and nurofen cooled her down and she fell asleep and it seemed rude to wake her. DD2 slept in my bed and is still asleep by me now. She woke several times and is still v hot. DH slept in with DD1 who has woken with a hacking cough but only a mild fever and she is looking quite spritely. Fingers crossed things are in the up.

MoM - in my opinion having good friends, good jobs and being happy and settled is all you can ask from a home. It sounds like the advantages of Canada are more abstract or at least look good on paper but won't mean much if you feel unsettled and uprooted. It's a really hard one though.

JJ - it sounds like you are thinking through all the pros and cons of your potential move. When will all the unknowns be known? I.e when will you know whether yr friends and BiL are moving?

Sybs - being miss sold a husband. That must be hard. Any idea what changed him? It's strange for a very sociable person to become insular for no reason. I worry DH was miss sold me. I used to me much more sociable but the death of my mum, the exhaustion of mothering and my phobia have all eroded my self confidence. It's one of the reasons I am having more therapy for my phobia - I don't want it to impact on DH or the kids. I hope you two can find a way forward that allows you to be properly happy.

Trace - Your last post said both girls are being great at the mo. Does that mean you are enjoying L more now? If so that's great. And have you decided whether to apply for the new job?

Vegola - I think it's kinda good that your DH is truthful about what he finds attractive. DH will never say what he likes. If I ask him if my weight bothers him he'll chorus "of course not", if I ask whether he prefers my hair up or down he'll say "both look great", glasses or contact lenses "I like your eyes framed but I also like your face unobscured". It drives me a bit potty as I question whether he is putting good manners above sincerity.

Where is Jolly? Trace is right that she's been missing a while.

And I do hope Spot is coping.

DD2 still not stirring. She us snoring though. I really want to get up but can't leave her unattended on our v high bed.

avo your poor girls, and poor you. how did DD1 get on at OOH? I hope the night brought you all a little rest.

mom/jj/vag I imagine it must be extremely hard to make a decision about relocating. Especially when it isn't just 'you' to consider. I hope you all find a way to make the right choice for your families.

Well last night we put DS in his bed (converted the cotbed to just bed). He went of to sleep like a dream in it. Fell out twice but went back off okay. Then woke about 1am, screaming and refusing to go back in so ended up in our bed. Where I spent the rest of the night clinging to about 3" of mattress as he thrashed about! DH has rather foolishly given SIL both our stairgates, so I am going to have to steal my mums for a while as both times he woke he came running out of his room but never actually shouted for me. I am now convinced he's going to fall downstairs half asleep!

Need another coffee my eyes are stinging from lack of sleep.

X post avo, good to hear they are doing okay!

Deids I'm having a 2nd coffee now with you.

Avo glad to see there is definite improvement with the DDs neurofen is fabby stuff.

Right need to get DS2 into a pushchair going to walk into town to have a look at a gym.

avo so relieved to hear they're ok, DH's opinion was as long as they're responsive then that's the main thing, it's a high fever and not responding that's the worrying thing. Fingers crossed 2011 gets better for you from now on... It sounds a bit like DH is tyring his best to be positive about appearance things (specs etc) but definitely that can be a pain when you just want a straight answer.

Jam can you steam DS in a bath to help his cough?

DB sorry about the bed scare and dodgy night, you definitely need a stairgate back, we were terrified she'd get out and tumble downstairs in her sleepy bag.

moving - the pals we'd miss most are DH's godfather and his wife (who I would really, really badly miss, we do a lot of our singing with them an have known them for years) but he's looking for consultant jobs at the mo and will find out later in the year if/where there are any. Plus DD's godmother and little girl M who are pretty fixed in London, but we don't get to see them as often as we'd like anyway... BIL is on a contract til May and then needs to find another post, and he's waiting for that before he proposes to his GF and then they'll move in together. So plenty of known unknowns. TBH the main thing that concerns me (purely selfishly) is falling off the career ladder completely after I've managed to get a really very plum job in my field down here, it's always possible to make new friends and to make plans to see the ones we have. I've lived in C for 15 years, maybe it is time for a change?

Mom, you definitely sound happier in London - as Avo says the concrete benefits of being in the UK are easier to quantify though. Do you long for the same upbringing for the kids that you had (open air etc) or do you feel that the benefits of the UK would be better for them in the long run?

veggie, what a tough situation - it must have been helpful to have boobs over the holiday for DS2 but if he's now more dependent than before, harder to wean him off. No advice I'm afraid, is this one for kellymom for ways to do it without too much pain? Definitely not good if you're finding yourself resentful of his dependence. Also, am v impressed that you and DH can be so honest about physical attraction. It's been a bit of a tricky thing between me and dh simply because I was a lot smaller when we first started going out (had just finished professional coxing and been through a nice break-up :() and I'm often aware of that. Fortunately he's a T&A man so I can offer him more of that than before

right, there should be some hot water now - boiler emergency people didn't let us know until Friday that they wouldn't be fixing it after all as we're outside the 15 year age limit on boiler, so back to whacking it on the side to make it come on and then hoping it doesn't switch off. Plus shower pump has shorted so no showers possible. Sigh.

Quick Q - for the last week and a bit dd has been weeing through her nappy every night and waking up with soggy pjs and sleepy bag, have any of you changed to special night nappies to avoid this? She's currently in the largest size of nature baby ones so we can't move up for night time, probably need to get a new brand for the nights. Any favourites?

Avo poor you and your poorly girls, it sounds exhausting. I hope the ABs kick in quickly, have you got some for DD1 as well?

Sybs reading your post about you and your DH made me very sad, but a willingness to see a counsellor is a step in the right direction I'm sure. Don't forget that the basket is strong. Was it you who implemented date nights with your DH last year? I seem to remember them being successful. Or maybe it was Deids, my memory is failing me.

My resolutions are:
To do more activities with DD and watch less telly. And to ban telly on in the background.
To be more inspired and get out of my cooking rut, so any recipes for family meals will be accepted.
To brain wash DH into using the laundry basket.
And DH and I had a lovely chat on NYE and agreed that the only thing we really wanted to change this year is the size of our family

We've not heard from kiwi for a while, or Njan, I hope they're both well. And I wonder how Katie is getting on with her house and DC3

Xposted, good news about the girls Avo

Oh, and I meant to have a whinge to you girls about my period, as you don't look all panicky at a mention of it , like DH does. I've been bleeding for about 3 days and I'm slap bang in the middle of my cycle, I hate it when my cycle goes skewiff, I just feel that all is not right in the world. And I know DH is angling for some new year action , which would be nice before we go back to work. Tut

Naughty ZJ did you scare everyone off with your talk of mid cycle flow. Not sure what advice to give as big peoples health ishoos are out of my league but I think Avo was having frequent bleeding and went to GP with hormonal concerns but I think it turned out to be something else entirely which I suddenly can't remember if it was polycystic ovaries or endometriosis?

JJ thanks for your support on the boy and his boob fixation I might have a look on kellymom. I thought of posting on MN but there is always someone who pops up with "but why do you want to stop" you know the guilters. Actually today has been a lot better he has barely mentioned "mook mook" and he hasn't had a feed since last night as I went for a walk with him today and he slept in the pushchair. Maybe it was just him getting over the cold. I think he also found our friends house in London quite hot and dehydrating, I know I did. I'm not very good in overheated houses. I'm constantly thirsty in them.

DH and I went for a walk into town today and as DS2 fell asleep we had a nice dim sum lunch. Then I had a look at a gym and decided to get s years membership. They had really good deals on off peak membership and their hours for off peak are quite generous, 7am-4pm.

hello all. firstly huge congratulations to spot. I was thinking of you and hoping all went well. Sorry I fell off end of cliff. Was stupidly stressful just before christmas and then we went away and i had no internet for nearly a fortnight which was odd but strangely peaceful. I missed you though. Have little hope of catching up, but sybs I read your post and wanted to say that I think if he's willing to do counselling it's definitely worth a shot. my new years resolution is to start going to see my therapist chap again. feel like there's stuff i need to sort out and i am determined - having made a right mess of lots of things before not to make a mess of my family.

i got the job - which i think i'm pleased about. but also intimidated. probably right. in sadder news though i was pg again and had another mc - this one later and so more grisly. started on christmas eve. so not such a great christmas for us. i didn't tell my family either which i think was a mistake because i was clearly being odd, but i really didn't want to talk about it.

avo i hope your girls are better. frightening stuff.

sorry for miserable post. I will cheer up...

I'm sorry to hear your news Urbane :(. Treat this as a near-silent thump on the shoulder from me.

Oh poor Urbs I'm so sorry to hear about the mc. Are you ok physically? The therapy sounds good. I often wander if I should get my head sorted out before I mess up my children. I hope you didn't hurt yourself falling off that cliff, be careful near the edge next time.[;)]

That was supposed to be a