Dec 2008 - Hello 2011 the Year of the Toddler!

[DeidreBarlow]

Totally unispired but hope you all find it...

oh no deids if it's square crisps it has to be cheese and onion
I was back at work today, which was rather nice actually! Feels a bit like I've not been away, but in a good way. One of my colleagues wasn't there though because over the hols she had a massive leak/flood in her house and the whole place is ruined. All ceilings down, all rooms ruined, all clothes, bags, pictures, photos, furniture...the lot. I can't imagine what that's like. It's going to be minimum 6 months before it'll be anything like ready for her to go home.
I decided no to go for the other job - mainly because of a sense of loyalty to the schools I work in. I've worked hard over the last year or so to build good relationships and have initiated a few new things, so kind of feel I ought to/ would like to see that through a bit longer. But I have written an email to the lady who showed me round the other job place, explaining why I didn't apply and thanking her for her time, and saying I'd be interested in the future (Ie a little bum-licking so as not to urn any bridges!) Feels like it was the right thing.
L went to The Deep - big aquarium in Hull - with my parents today and LOVED it! She's back to school tomorrow. And P moved up a room at nursery today so she's now offically a Tweenie, with a new key worker and everything. SHe was a bit tearful when I left her this morning, but cheered up when she saw her friend Ruby, who moved up with her. I cried (of course) but the staff assured me they'd ring if there were any worries - which I know they would. I got her tonight and she'd had a lovely day A few wobbly moments but on the whole a happy start to the Tweenies.
SOrry I'm just waffling about me. DH is still ill - now of work till at least Friday with a chest infection, so I think I'm on kid , cooking , cleaning , packed lunch , life duty for a while longer...
Speaking of such, I must press on with the ironing and packed lunches before I fall asleep!
I'm getting worried about jolly

sorry about all the typos

Trace, that sounds like a very good thing to have done, writing to the lady from the potential new job, even though you didn't go for it. Very wise. Gosh, I do hope Jolly is ok...

Beans, you are right about the support on here. Having you, Rubes and Summer going before me gave me real hope that it would turn around. I mention all this for all those awaiting DC2, and also Spot just in case she is reading. It is blissful with two now, yes, but those first few weeks, even though I totally loved DD2 from the beginning, were headsplittingly hard. Not just being in pain from the CS, from which I had a physically poor recovery as you all know; but the terrible tiredness which comes with two hourly feeds and the not feeling on top of anything and the trying to cope with DD1's emotions. Anyway, given that DD2 is only 14 weeks or so, I do feel marvellous. Aside from being a podgster, but I was before, and I will be sorting that out.

I have had that same thought about the tragic pants only very recently . My pants used to be beyond reproach. Now they are big, scraggy and shameful.

A cautionary tale about the Mirena Coil as well, Beans. Trace, you ditched the pill in the end, didn't you? Rubes and I were talking about contraception the other day and Rubes you mentioned that Yasmin is good as Pills go but it's not available on the NHS - is that correct? Oh, the whole thing is such a pain in the ass. I am currently using a rather heartsinking combo of condoms and not much sex. It isn't really sustainable

DD1 told DP that I was 'going to London' when they dropped me off at the station the other day. I was quite impressed I haven't particularly mentioned 'London' to her as a place. She went on to say, apparently, a few hours later, that I was 'shopping in London'. It's only a matter of time before she starts telling people that I am 'drinking in London'.

Oh Trace. That poor person from work. It happened to me 5 years ago. My boiler burst while I was away for a weekend and my home was totally ruined. It was noticed when water was pouring out of my downstairs windows. The boiler was upstairs and it had poured through and filled up downstairs!! Actually was best thing that ever happened in some ways because it meant I rebuilt my downstairs with an extension. But at the time it was miserable. It took 4 months to dry out and another 4 to get the work done. Would have been 2 months if I hadn't had extension done, so 6 months sounds about right.

Well done you for making that work decision. Sounds like the right one.

DD1 up & screaming already once. She is so full of snot and coughing. I have capolled her up to the eyeballs. She actually requests it now when she feels shit!

Lady! DD1 has it in the bag! Hilarious. Cross posted with you big style. DH out tonight & tmw. It's all back to normal again! Shame. I surprised myself by enjoying having all our time off together. I just need to be more positive about things. Am so negative, it pisses me off!!

trace - no shame with tears re the move, dd's key worker from the baby room was lovely and said she would really miss dd, cue me sobbing... transition was fine in the end, dd massively excited by all the cool stuff they do in toddlers. Your poor colleague, what an utter nightmare that must be :( does she have somewhere to stay for now?

square crisps - yes, must be S&V, they're particularly strong flavoured as well and quite low cal (because the bag is small... )

hello nolda! How is E doing these days? Chin wobble sounds about par for the course at the moment, dd goes all still when she's told off then sobs "Mummy cuddle!" and it would be cruel not to

vagola mmmm massive muscly blokes sound nice [drool] I did used to love watching my rowers on the ergs, and having to help them get their shoulders into the right position [lecherous JJ] Good luck with the new programme.

effie - am also v impressed with your planning on doing Latin! I have a friend's copy of that orange latin grammar book but hardly know any - my vocab is restricted to specific work related stuff so not much use for reading poetry ect!

Lady glad to hear you sounding so relaxed about life with the girls at the moment. Any news on the move or is that still a taboo subject?

DB sorry to hear the bed thing still not working out. I tried to persuade dd to nap in hers the other day and she just would not lie down so I ended up leaving her to it, 5 minutes later there's wailing as she'd gone out of her room, into ours, and shut the door on herself and couldn't get out. Red face covered in tears wailing Mummy cuddle! :( Have put the anti-slam thing on now so hopefully that will stop any repeats.

jam no advice on the coil we're planning for DH to get snipped [muahahaaaa] but that does sound as if there's something not right. Does it take ages to settle in or do you think this might be a long term disagreement with it? Nowt wrong with wanting some nice new knickers.

I would just like to say that I love my midwife. Had an extra scan today because of the whole big tummy business, dd2 is still pretty big and actually climbing up the centiles so currently 6lb3 by their guestimate, which would be coming out at only about 9lbs at birth, bigger than dd1 but nowhere near massive. So midwife said no problem with carrying on plans for HB, she'll just brief the rest of the community team on the likelihood of a big baby and to read up on shoulder dystocia and so forth in case they need to know. I was a bit worried she'd say No home birth! or You must be induced early! but absolutely not. What a star she is. :)

I was over 9lbs and born at home, JJ (mind you, 'twas different in the 1970s). Gosh, not long for you now, my love! The move...well...it does make me gnash my teeth rather. Still trying to find someone to line the hucking chimney for under a million pounds. Well, not quite, but you know what I mean. I also have to find a couple of men and an enormous truck to move my stuff from storage in W. London to much cheaper storage in the W. Mids.

Yes Nolda, that chinwobble sounds heartbreaking!

Right, must go...

Hello all
Firstly massive thanks for all your kind words. You really are lovely. And it's very nice having you to talk to . LadyT is so good to hear you sounding chipper.

Beans you need to get new pants . My only thing even when I've got hairy legs/greasy hair (mm nice) is I always wear nice underwear. Sounds completely princessy but makes me feel good. Even when - as now - I'm slightly wobbling out of it. Also only bit of household expenditure that DH never ever raises an eyebrow over . I even went mad and always had those nice hotmilk maternity keks.

We are still keeping DD in a cot because I can't face the battle. She and DS are in the same room and I know she'll torment him. One for when she's a bit more reasonable I think (2018?). Hats off to those have you who've done it and Deids hope tonight was a bit more successful.

Trace am glad you've decided about the job. Sounds sensible.

Another one guilty of secret santa lateness - sorry especially as my present arrived and was fantastic, am really excited about seeing both films. Very very kind of you whoever you are

JJ am pleased you have nice midwife. Their measurements can be quite a lot of bollocks so good that you have someone sensible.

Firstly, so sorry Urbs Does this mean you and dh have decided for sure on a 3rd? Sending preggo sticky vibes your direction.

Jam how's your friend holding up?

Deids how are your family these days as well?

Gosh, Harvester again. I think dh is trying to convince ds from a young age that their salad bar is a good thing Summer tell your dh he will be jealous

Lady Yes I would come along Thurs except I'm not sure Sybs has it in mind still and without Sybs, CJ isn't exactly convenient for you and I really! I feel a bit bad as I had mentioned to DH and he said no probs then forgot later he was on call and in the mean time has switched it to another day to accomodate me. So it was stupid on my behalf to not firm it up with you Sybs before I mentioned it. I think he has gone and reversed it on my advice anyway and luckily the co-worker is quite ok with that as dh has done him many a favour.
Yes I took our tree down on the 2nd. I hate having them up after Boxing Day and especially in the new year. it was surprisingly spritely and fresh looking still and we got it on the 1st. Well worth the money those Frasers
Oh gosh our holidays in Feb - def going ahead but back and forth about route to get there and number of days where etc as we can't decide whether to go via the US (which would break up the trip well for the littles) and lso my cousin-in-law has offered to straighten my hair for mates rates but not sure if dh has the leave to accomodate.

parents are still a bees dick away from being under water so hoping it's all dried out by then

Vag I've been meaning to ask you again. we have been thinking about this bike trailer but as well as that I remember you said you put a seat on the back and also had the wee ride on the front at some point? How did you find that, and how old was ds1 when you had him on the back? Or was ds2 the one on the back?
Go you at the Gym. I looked at our very close posh one's website and it's POA DH said if you have to ask you can't afford But to be fair I'm quite enjoying Mr pS3 and the 9 week program he has me on. (to be fair I've only had 2 sessions but dd is a real motivation. There is a mountain bike part with jumps (lunges etc) and she giggles and giggles and shrieks when I do the jumps it' makes me go harder so cute. Today ds was awakw for me session and he was trying to do dome of it with me, which was cute too, until he saw the flashy lights on the sensor things strapped to me and wanted to play with them which kicked off a tantrum and required me to have an extended "water break"

Beans, yes meet up anytime. Just let me know, you still have my number? Your DH goes out an awful lot - you are a very tolerant wife. Glad you are feeling better, and too bad dd is back in her waking mode. We haven't left that really, however it's getting ridiculous as dd won't hardly eat a thing in the daytime - which totally explains why she wakes at night. i'm thinking of just going with it for now as it'll work out great for my holiday nah actually I probably have to go through a night of her screaming a little to get her on track and be hungry in the day, but I can't be arsed at 3am as she's quite easy to dream and night feed so I get lazy.

Deids, we put ds in a bed ages ago. he didn't come out at all at first, but then when he started to, we did the supernannny thing and put him back in bed without talking etc (usually about 3 attempts) but then we both just got lazy [blush and didn't bother going back up and then he would just scream for about 5 mins max and then slam the door in disgust and get back into bed himslef. A friend of mine did the same and just had to out them back to bed off the floor for about 2 weeks and that was it - they don't bother getting out now. DS has his odd days of screamathons depending how tired he is but sometimes just goes straight off. The gate goes up regardless though but we take it down when we go to bed and try to remember to shut the gate at top of the stairs but it usually doesn't matter as he just makes a beeline for our bed anyway!
Mom yes - it's a toughy that move / which country thing arrrgh. I get really down sometimes but then really think about what the situation would be back home, and the bottom line is we need to live where is best for dh's work and at the moment (barring a 12 month fellowshipe which will no doubt be back home) it would be career suicide to move to my home the way things are in his field at his level even when he's finished. And that said, I know I'd be happier with a good income and happy husband over just getting by and holding back dh - so I have to just keep remembering that. I hate the UK at times but then love it at other times and for other reasons. i have loads of great friends here now and although i still have my friends back home, I recently had a friend move hom after 6 years hear and regretted it so she said think long and hard which was a good point. I think she thought things may go back to how she remembered but the reality was her old life had moved on.

Anyway, dh is hankering for a bit of Golf on the PS so I'd best get my clubs out as I wasn't too bad last night on the back nince and I need to keep up before he starts earning points and new clubs and accuracy then I'm screwed

Hope Spot and Jolly are OK??

And hi Kiwi and Nolda

Impressed Lady? Total epic!

Urbane I am so sorry to hear the sad news about your mc, I imagine you were still feeling fragile after the first, so doubly upsetting this time. I second all those who recommend some TLC as you deserve it right now. Congratulations on the job offer

Beans I am thrilled you like the scarf, and I have no objections to being outed as your SS (although, had you hated the pressie I would have preferred you to keep schtum!) I really liked it too and so nearly bought myself one as well, but had put it to the back of my mind ? now you?ve reminded me I might go back and see if they have any left and then we can be scarf twins

Does anyone have Spot?s address? Please can you fb it to me?

Trace I love the Deep, but haven?t got round to taking DD yet, but I must one day. Did you know they do sleepover parties there? I am very tempted to take on running the local brownie pack, just so I can go on a sleepover with the fishes. Yay for P being a perfect tweenie, E will be going to up to the big room this month and I am terrified for her

I didn?t feel the earthquake LadyT, but I live about as far east as you can and still be in Yorkshire and not living with Vagola. But Trace is probably only about 20 miles from where the epicentre was she may have felt a tremble or two. Thanks for your enthusiasm on our family plans, I?m loving the anticipation of it myself. From experience I am under no illusions that it will be easy, but with luck and a bit of good management it would be lovely if I could be clackered by the end of this year

My bleeding has stopped now, lets hope it stays that way. I was thinking it has only ever happened before when I?ve missed a pill or something, so obviously (fake) hormonal, I?ll see what happens with my next period and decide if I need to see a Dr about it

DD has been loving playing with her new dolls, but astonishes how much she knows about childcare ? yesterday she was actually shaking the bottle onto the back of her hand before giving it to baby. As she flatly refused to ever drink from a bottle herself, I can only assume she is very observant at nursery when the babies are getting fed. She will make a fabby Mum and will put me to shame I am sure, but at least I'll be able to bask in her reflected glory and be an uber proud Granny

Crosstastic.
Urbs good to hear from you. You sound better.
Lady I meant to say i was crying laughing at your dd1's declarations / observations!! she's a smart one. Won't be long before she is saying "Lady is going to London to drink with Rubes" priceless that was.
Oh and that's great news JJ
On the contraception as lady was saying about our discussion - yes Yasmin was the pill I found was fab for me but I asked for it here and they said negative on the NHS.
DH won't write me a prescription (some code of conduct bolocks ) but I have an appointment to see the GP on Thurs. I really wanted a double as ds still has an atrocious sounding cough but I'm going to weigh it up on the morning of since they would only offer a single, and given that I had a breakthrough bleed for 2 bloody weeks almost, then the sugar pills started. one day nothing then a full on period started again, i feel it's more of an issue to get sorted sicne ds seems fine generally, but I still feel bad for him. Will try and cheekily aske the GP anyway about his cough, and risk a "you need a double appointment lecture".

Super quickie before I head to bed. Was reading today's posts. Saw Ladyt mentioned Yasmin as a contraceptive. I am on it it's available on NHS. Also I have spent the better part of 15yrs trying various pills and it's the only one that works.

Sorry my spelling and grammar is appaling. But you know what I meant I hope

Just before I turn in for the night, I've just remembered DD's comedy turn today - I was emptying the washing machine when I heard 'ooh rabbit'. She had found the pads that had dropped out of my bra and was running round the kitchen holding them on her head like ears . Yet another item I will need to keep under lock and key as I can see her thinking that this is a party trick all guests should be allowed to see

Oh Jam! Crossed posted with you and I'm so glad you said that. it's a fab pill no side effects etc and actually makes my skin look better. it was AGES ago (when I first moved here) that I tried to get it and was told not available so perhaps that's why but I'm thrilled now so will ask for it on Thurs. I was on it when I lived in the US and worked a treat. Thanks again Jam x

Lady and Ladies - THIS is why I liked Yasmin28!!!

Hello girls

Very quickly as I have only skimmed - so sorry for the confusion. I meant A thursday, rather than THIS Thursday, which unfortunately I can't do. It doesn't have to be a Thurs of course and it doesn't have to be CJ. I just thought that there were a few of us for whom the J would be good but can easily do town if that would suit. Shall we sort an evening out for end of Jan / early Feb? I realise these things take time and it's mid Jan next week !!!

Panty old work tom. Up at6. Yuk, best go to sleep.

Hello,

Well we put the boys in together and what a mistake that was. DS1 up at 3 and then DS2 up at 5. Trying to use this time to do something useful rather than watch cbeebies and feel nauseous.
Urbane sorry to hear about the MC, I hope you are OK.
Beans glad to know I'm not the only one with crap pants. I think I need an underwear allowance, I have "functional" and good sets but they get mixed up and all become "grey and nasty".
Trace glad to hear Tweenies is going OK. I Found dropping them off yesterday very sad. I was very unmotivated at work yesterday and I think maybe a need a change, I was thinking of how worried you were when you were pg Lady and how happy you sound now. Maybe I just need to find a new and different job, or move somewhere else where our money would stretch further.

Dieds I was going to ask how your family was. How is your DH coping with the anniversary of his DMs death (was it sometime around now?)

We have some amazon vouchers, I was wondering if anyone has a wii or ps3, are thet worth getting, do you play them with your DH ? We need to develop some new shared interests. Sybs I think I nderstand what you say about being missold a partner. We met when we were both very young and were really happy for many years. But the facts are that we are that although we share some values we are very different and have very different interests. Our differences have been magnified by a million since the kids and this is the part of our marriage where we seem to have to be working very hard. Sometimes I'd like to leave but I do still love him, I'm sure he feels the same way. I've tried to start looking for the things that he cant give elswhere (ie with friends and family) but it is difficult. We werent missold eachother as such but in a way we didnt make an informed choice if you know what I mean.

Not sure if this makes sense. Bugger another day at work to look forward to.

urbs Good to hear from you, and that you are doing okay

Gosh jolly has been awol a while now hasn't she?

trace I like your style emailing the woman back about the job! Always good to stay on good terms with things like that.

Well last night DS was frog-marched back to bed for only 30 mins when he caved in and went to sleep! He woke at 4am, and I heard him rattling the gate. I just went in said nothing put him back in bed and walked out - he slept till 7, hooray!

Thanks for asking about the family. Anniversary of MIL's death is beginning of Feb. It was about this time last year she came home. DH is actually really good at the moment. I know he will struggle in the next few weeks, but overall he is better than he has been in a long while.

My Nan however, is still in hospital. Very weak and terribly depressed. They are talking about her going into a hospital to help her get back on her feet as medically she is nearly right to come home. She is to frail to go to my mums yet as she couldn't manage the stairs to the bathroom etc. So we'll see. But my parents are off to Sri Lanka next week as my Dad was 60 yesterday. Although I think nan is giving mum a serious guilt trip about leaving her (she has another son & daughter who visit all the time plus numerous cousins).

Right DD back at school today, I'd best get moving!

Morning all :). Sorry to hear about big bed travails. We are wussing out on that front as it would mean serious furniture rearrangement to fit another bed in the boys' room.

On the pill front, I have the implant and had a few months or more or less constant bleeding. It's settled down now, touch wood.

JJ and Lady: the Latin is career-y rather than pure cerebral stimulation . if I want to move from my current field it would be really helpful. I did a year if beginners Latin at uni and them some medieval stuff in my MA but have forgotten all bar a few bits of grammar and the ruder vocal in Catullus. Not much use when it comes to deciphering a deed.

Home with the boys today, the place is a tip already as I was too tired/unmotivated to do anything last night. So best get on with it.

And I have my childcare all sorted out - phew! Dropping down to 2 days a week from mid Jan then childcare changes from 1st Feb so I have a few child free days.

Oh and I have seriously crap pants....really shameful!

Pants grey and minging.

Dieds sorry to hear your nan is still not right. fingers crossed your DH copes ok in the coming wks.

Loving the going to London shopping comments.

Trace very sensible writing the job woman. I am always up for keeping a little thumb in the door.

Oh and does anyone have SPOTS address?

JJ great news on the HB. 9lb is fine DS2 was 9.5. Wont lie having a larger baby is a bit stingy on exit.

ZJ that is very cute with the rabbit ears. My two often wonder round the house with tampax hanging out their ears.

Well I saw my friend yesterday (thanks for asking Rubes) for the the first time since she lost her baby. Poor thing is coping pretty well but I was shocked at the behaviour of some of the HCP. Her poor baby is at a funeral home but a Dr forgot to fill in the paperwork correctly and he has to go back to the hospital then back to the funeral home so it will be another 3 wks before she can have a funeral. Also when she went to register his birth and death. The registra was quizzing her about the illness and why had she left it so late. Then found out another Dr and incorecctly filled in the forms and stuff had to be faxed and phone calls made. Then the most shocking was that after she had givenbirth she was taken to the post natal ward not even put on a side rm for privacy and when she got up there the midwife on duty wanted to know where her baby was. Honestly would you not think that they would relay messages to each other saying there was a woman coming up who had lost her baby. But apart from all that she is doing quite well. She has started smoking and is drinking heavily in the evening when her other DC go to be which worries me but am hoping she will get past that.

It was lovely to see her and the DC though and DS1 was delighted to hang out with his buddy. He saw her DS get out the car and ran up to him and gave him a huge hug and said oh you are my best friend in the world.

Jam that is awful, just awful treatment of your friend. massive complaint needs to be made. How sad for her.
Hope things turn around for her soon.

Sybs no worries - hope things are getting better.

NJAN we have PS3 - not the ideal activity I wanted to do with dh but I've been using the PS Active and enjoying that. We play the golf together on it which is quite fun but try not to play it when ds is awake or at all around him if dh has one of his violent one's on.
He is doing up his mountain bike for me to use so will try and do some cycling together and buy a trailer etc.

On the pants - I think dh was mis-sold a nice pants wearing wife. After I was divorced I went all Vixtoria Secret black and lacy (as you do) then later met dh and then had kids and discovered Tesco F&F seamless G-strings were the most comfortable pants in the world! I only wear G-s's as I find normal full pants uncomfy but just can't put away the Tesco's at the moment I am def going to go back to some black lacy's again though. Enough's enough
On the mis sold thing I think ours is the opposite and dh was mis sold a wife I've become stroppy and moody in my old age and worry about too many things, however that's going to change this year! However on the other hand. I have been chopping wood this morning as there was not enough kindling left and I wanted to light the fire. Bet he didn't know I was quite the lumberjack, so there you go, it all evens out
Sorry your nan is still struggling Deids but hope your parent's enjoy their trip guilt free. Sounds like they need it.

I was up till 1am chatting to my Mum about our trip. Going to get onto this passport stuff. I still haven't got dd's sorted as I just look at the paperwork and want to tear my hair out. it's on the list to do when dc's are in bed tonight. I really need to RSVP the wedding and start booking some hotels though really. Oh not to mention actually decide which direction we will go and when

Oh and JJ was it you asking about the leaking nappies? US - we have had that problem for AGES now as ds drinks WAY TOO MUCH MILK. We resorted to putting TWO nappies on him which sort of worked but then last night he leaked through BOTH and I'm currently washing his bed clothes again problem was dh pulled out the emergency trump card milk at the Harvester last night to avoid a meltdown right when our food came. Think the only answer is less milk in the evening here, however next ssainsbury's order I'm going to try those "dry nite's" however I think they will be too big. Let me know how your situation unfolds.

Does Spot's baby have a name yet?

Morning all. Interested to read about other little ones going up a class at nursery. DD was supposed to go upstairs in her nursery to the new room but only half her class were moving, and her beloved best friend (she even calls her her best friend) Naomi wasn't going up. Her trial morning there was a bit of a disaster - nursery tend to always tell us she's fine but even they admitted she wasn't very happy there - so we asked if she could stay down and move up when Naomi does. I hope we've done the right thing. They talk about the activities being "more advanced" but seriously, how much more advanced can they be, it's not like they are reading Dickens up there!? She and N are only 10 days apart, age-wise, too, so surely if it's ok for one to stay down it's ok for both. Well, I hope so anyway. DH wasn't sure but I took the view that I'd rather she was happy.

Oh goodness Jam that is terrible :(

Please, please encourage her to write it all down and get it sent off to the hospital. If there is a maternity services liason committee then that is the best place. The powers that be in hospital need to know this sort of thing. I'm so sorry that she has had such shoddy treatment.

Proper catch up when dcs stop[ flinging playdough around!