So embarrassed I wanted to die.

[Katkins17]

So I bought my shopping in Tesco...as you do....said thank you to the cashier when she gave me the receipt and my brain couldn't decide whether it wanted to say 'you're welcome' or 'no problem' so instead it shouted quite loudly to the cashier and the whole queue behind me ...

'YOU'RE THE PROBLEM'

I just stood there, with us all looking uncomfortable and not knowing what to say .... plus a few sniggers behind.

What is the worse thing you've said without meaning to ?????

🤣🤣🤣this has tickled me OP.

You were supressing some problem that forced it's way out.

I was that cashier...........

Gosh that made me laugh out loud, I actually do stuff like that and still lie awake at night worrying about it 20 years later

No! That would be great!
Well,now ypu know what she meant LOL
It happens to us all OP.

"Enjoy your meal!"

"And you!"

I've done this more than once.

That is brilliant. You poor thing 😂

Mine is:
I get on well with my boss. We are still very professional, but can have good ole chin wag.
After one phone call, in which we had put the world to rights, I ended the call by saying
" Right. Better go, I have another call.now. Speak to you later. Love you bye"

love you bye

Luckily my boss found it really funny. I was mortified. 😫

@minou123 I've said very similar to the Morrisons delivery man.

I responed to "Hello" from a neighbour with a cheery "great" for some reason.

You so have to own that OP!! I hope you strutted out with your head held high before collapsing with shame in the car park x

"Happy birthday"

"And you."

We did not share a birthday.

Snort. You'll have to start shopping in the next town over.

Same. 'Speak to you later... love you!' When hanging up the phone to my work colleague 😅

Bless you OP 😂 It happens to the best of us! Take heart from what I assume are going to be some highly amusing responses.

My nightmare moment, that I still cringe thinking about, was suggesting we organise an outing for a group of young people to the ‘Hard Cock Rafé’, rather than the Hard Rock Café. For context, this was a work situation with people I didn’t know well enough for it to be laughed off and it was received with stony silence 😱

Saying "Good Morning" to the neighbours when walking up the road, and it's dark and it's nighttime.

I've read this tweet before.

This one is still my favourite "accidentally combining two phrases" story though:

Or when you ask someone how they are and they say 'fine thanks.' I respond 'yeah I'm fine thanks' when they didn't actually ask me how I was... so embarrassing

A colleague ended a call, meaning to say 'thanks, bye' and instead cheerily shouted 'thigh!'

“”Grool”

Back in my freelance days I once told a client I didn't think his friend should be taking her PMS symptoms out on him. The email was meant to go to a friend with the same Christian name as the client. hits head on desk

Client found it funny (I'm in quite a laid-back profession, thankfully) but I still cringe when I think about it. 😬

My friend during her presentation infront of the whole university said orgasm instead of organism. I was crying laughing, she was bright red but can laugh about it now

Manager: "Hey, alright if I borrow your stapler?"

Me: (thinking) "go ahead/work away". (actually say) "go away"

I walked into a restaurant in France 15 years ago. Owner said "bon soir" instead of saying same back I said "au revoir" as it rhymed! My daughter who understood enough french howled with laughter and the owner looked at me in total confusion

I came late out of college once, jumped into the passenger seat of my mums car, started belting myself a in while saying “we need to get home I really need a poo” to look up and find, in fact, it was not my mums car.

meanwhile, my actual mum, had just pulled into the carpark none the wiser. I just hopped right back out hoping I would never, ever see them again at pickup.

In Spain as a child on holiday. Amazed to see the bulls running directly below our apartment,'causing absolute chaos

Races back to tell my parents, grandparents and siblings and meant to announce ' there's a load of bulls in the street all bucking and fighting!'

Actually said 'there's a load of bulls in the street all fucking and biting!'