Gin and a moat

[paxillin]

Not by one of the Queens this time... But we can drink here.

Is 'gin and a moat' an unusually large drink?

I followed instructions not to mention her Maj's unfortunate rectal ailment .

We left the old gin in the old moat and thought we'll drink better stuff here. We have no moat yet here.

Well who's going to dig one for the gin?

And I think you'll find its the other queen that doesn't have big piles although actually she did, we found them hiding out in the back passage. Remember? Do you remember?! Where's the moat of gin? I need a drink already.

Well, the problem is that despite being under 'other subjects', Your fake Majesty, Mortificado doesn't seem to have any 'other subjects' - y'know, the sort who can be forced to fairly paid to dig a moat. Unless the menagerie of us mythical beasts includes giant moles or something.

I can probably manage to get you some gin though. For some reason, whenever I fly into an offie, the staff go pale, thrust bottles at me and beg me to leave. I suppose a less well regulated dragon could cause chaos in among gallons of proof spirit. Hang on a mo...

That's all I could carry, weirdly they wouldn't give me a bag and I didn't have 5p.

Ooh, giant moles. Where can we get some of those?

That is weird. We don't even accept p's in Mortificado. Only munny.

How come with 'gin' in the title this place isn't busier on a Friday night? No moat to keep out undesirables. No other Mortificados (real or pretenders), dragons, unicorns or other subjects around?

Well whenever I see the title my brain just smooshes it together so gin and a moat becomes a goat. Maybe it's to do with that. Maybe they hate goats. Not me though, I like a goat, can we get a goat?!

Well, I had to fly outside Mortificado to get fresh unpolluted gin, hence the 5p bag problem. Find me a sack or something before my next raid shopping trip, would you?

I like some goats, and the ones I don't like are very tasty after a bit of flaming so yes, goats welcome.

Erm. We used all the sacks for the legfish. Maybe you can just fashion one out of pax's clothes.

Dragons are crap at needlework, oddly enough. if you want more than half a dozen bottles at a time, you make me a carrier. A gin sling.

Leather, then? Pax dumped all the legfish in sporner corner but I'm sure they're probably still out there somewhere. Surely you can leatherwork? Dragons must be good for something.

I've been looking to see if giant moles exist, nearest I can find is giant mole-rats but as they're diggers they might do the job. I tried approaching their cousins the big-headed mole-rats but they really are the most conceited beasts I've ever come across, said the job was beneath them even if you were a real queen.

well don't blame me, it's hardly my fault it's all gone. We're on normal drinking rates, blame the dragon who's too lazy to go get more. Do you have a bag?!

Was that a fruitbat? Bit of a comedown from dragons but wouldn't mind some flying companions.

Don't insult it! Bats can fly right? They might get more gin. Also I don't have a sack to catch it with so plan A is out.

What do you mean, hardly your fault it's gone? I don't see anyone else drinking it (you know I'm teetotal myself, on account of the flammability of alcohol. I can just about manage a weak pimms)

When I said 'wander back out' - it wasn't strictly true. erm, I lurked. Please may I ask a question? goes ahead anyway I saw lurked on the threads last year when you all changed your names to variations of Mortificdo. Why didn't you change Pax?

FFS Mortificado

what happens if you drink? I bet it's hilarious, quick, go get more gin!