A community for parents...or is it?

[mumof2andlovingit]

as a new member, I was under the impression that this is a website community "by Parents, for Parents." I have been participating in a thread that is very heated and discovered that there are non parents commenting on here. Do you all think this is ok? It seems quite bizarre to me that someone is trolling through the site that isn't a parent. What would their motives be? I don't go onto sites for singles and comment. Although I have been single before so feel I could offer something if I wanted. But someone on this site, commenting about parenting things - and they aren't a parent themselves?? I am just curious about PARENTS opinions here. Please let me (and others) know what your opinion is on this matter. I am happy to listen and maybe there is a point I haven't thought of...thank you!

OP you have not apologised anywhere on this thread without saying pooooor meeeeeee.

You couldn't even apologise to Donna without making it All About You.

OP you have the feeling of a previously banned poster about you. So please, if you are just fuck off and if you aren't, grow the fuck up. Stop stirring the pot in such a nasty way.

I wouldn't read a thread on ketchup that had 5 posts
But if it had 500 I would read it as it must be quite entertaining for such a dull thread
I'm a parent so I'm allowed my opinion
I don't do any actual parenting anymore cos I is old
Please let me stay op. I promise not to troll or trawl

I did say "I apologise if I offended anyone - was not my intention"

how else do you supposed I apologise?

Without then saying...BUT what about meeeeeeeeeeeeee.

And by clarifying what you meant by "trolling" I did throw you a lifeline on this one.........

Donna don't force yourself to 'be fine' in a few days. It's horrible, horrible life changing news. I hope you have found a supportive corner of MN to hang out in. However, don't lose all hope, it hadn't been ruled out entirely and you may have some other options x

'I'm sorry if I offended anyone' is a pretty crap apology (and I consider that of everyone who says it, not just you OP). There's no 'if' about it, people have explained how you've upset them and that apology seems to just throw it onto them and make it their responsibility for being upset at what you said.

What ever happened to plain old 'I'm sorry', or if you feel the need to expand 'I'm sorry, that was a hurtful thing to say'.

But then I'm not a parent, so my opinion probably doesn't count.

Chipping

I think we are thinking of the same nutjob.

we teach our children to say what they are actually sorry for - just saying you are sorry isn't enough. I explained what I was sorry for - I am sorry if I offended anyone. No matter what I say at this point, you will find fault with it. You don't have to accept my apology, that's up to you. But to say I didn't say sorry when I have - more than once, it's just rude.

Ah, the monthly 'why do people without children post on MN' thread.

Another childless heathen with opinions checking in!

I'm not a PARENT but ill take the risk and reply. I like the site because I don't know of any other like it for the sheer variety of sub forums and topics.

I might not be a parent but I've had relationships, can voice an opinion if someone is unreasonable, I watch TV, read books among many other things all which tie in to forums here. I may be approaching 50 faster than I'd like but I've been to more kids parties than I can count. I'm actively involved in my nieces lives so although I'm not a PARENT I have experience of a lot of child related things. obviously there's lots I don't have experience of so would never comment on. Just as I've never been to the pregnancy/ttc sections.l

I'd hate to think my opinion mattered less just because I'm not a PARENT. At least I've never posted a rude and potentially offensive thread

Mumof2 it's not a matter of "if" you offended anyone. From what I can tell you offended everyone with your aggressive tone. This has been explained several times, yet you still don't seem to understand why people are annoyed.

How about responding to donna's point directly rather than repeating what you've already said and then going off on yet another self-centred rant? And to have ended that rant with "move on already" was tactless in the extreme.

The very fact that Mumsnet has a dedicated infertility topic should have been hint enough that not everyone on here is a parent.

For what it's worth, I joined when I started TTC, sought support when I miscarried at 12 weeks, was further supported for the year it took to conceive a (fingers crossed) successful pregnancy and at 38 weeks am still not quite a parent. In amongst all the support I've posted on a number of topics ranging from TV programmes to animal care, none of which required me to have given birth to have an opinion.

I would take others' advice to name change and start again. We're generally a friendly bunch, but when you reach Australia it really is time to stop digging.

For you Donna - stay strong and seek support where you can. And there's definitely no pressure to get over the"soppy stuff" here.

I see the OP has repeatedly raised the issue of non parents posting on the other thread she's participating on. I definitely think a name change is a good idea.

donna ignore the OP she clearly hasnt read enough of MN to understand that it is a supportive community regardless of who you are or what circumstances you are in. your not being 'soppy' but even if you are so what your allowed to be x

It's an interesting suggestion, MrsDeVere - but what happens to your stars when your dc leave home? Do I lose half a star each because ds1 and ds2 are away at university, but still come home to sponge in the holidays? And will I lose the other half when they finally leave home?

How will Michelle Duggar ever find a badge big enough for all her stars?

Will there be different sorts of stars for grandchildren?

OP, you are rude and offensive and being a parent gives no extra weight to your opinions, it just makes you a rude and offensive person who happens to have children.

Also who set you up as site vetter? There is nothing in the terms and conditions of registering on this site that insists members must have children and be able to prove it.

You can read this site without being a registered member, what difference does it make whether people reading are parents or not?

What about step kids do I get stars for them and does the fact im a nanny mean im allowed a star but they could be a different colour to show im not a parent but I do know a bit about children?