It’s been raining here.
I’d struggling this weekend. My parents are visiting, and I do not cope well with people staying in my house. Tbh, neither does my nearly 2 year old. He’s much more difficult and doesn’t like the disruption. I’m so stressed with it all and it’s a real struggle to regulate my emotions.
The hardest thing is that, they think they’re being helpful, but the come in and just take over everything. This morning they’ve been steam cleaning my floors and are now doing my gardening. I mean, I’d just have let the yard turn into a vaguely apocalyptic wasteland of weeds (because I hate gardening). But the housework stuff is driving me nuts. First it feels judgemental and they are totally ignoring that I’d have sorted out things like floor mopping myself if they weren’t here disrupting my routine, moving my stuff around and generally taking over everywhere. I really hate people going through my stuff - it makes me anxious and upset.
My mum means well but she’s so overbearing and I really struggle with it. I’ve got ADHD and I find the lack of escape so hard. They arrived the minute I finished work on Friday and I feel like I’ve had no downtime. I also find that it don’t have the executive function bandwidth for having to reorganise everything around them. I’ve already worked out my basic routine that means we get the stuff we need to do done each weekend.
I just about hold stuff together and we all get through life clean, and fed and not living in actual squalor. But I have to factor in all these other variables with visitors, and even more so when they have an agenda about my house and my life. My mum wanted to do some big day trip somewhere (in the heat, with a toddler suffering from hay fever) and it all just sent me into meltdown. We didn’t go anywhere beyond local park but it was a nightmare and we had to go home quite quickly to keep the toddler inside away from the pollen as much as possible.
Today my STBXH will be picking the toddler up in the afternoon for a bit and that’s a nightmare. I need to make sure my parents stay away from him because, frankly, I don’t need either party making things more difficult. All the extra stress has meant that I’ve barely slept. I woke up at 4am and couldn’t get back to sleep.
i want my house back. Quiet, calm weekends are so much better.