Most bizarre conversation you have had with a toddler lately?

[peppapighastakenovermylife]

This morning on the way to nursery / work we were discussing how it was not a good idea to bite your tongue

We then criticised the cows for not being up yet (were not in their usual field) and how they must not have gone to bed at their usual bed time and how they would be very tired today

As random as they are I am really going to miss these conversations when they grow up

On the way to nursery the other day, Ds was telling DH that he was fishing kittens out of the water for him, and that they were snuggling up in his fleece. Apparently they were to go to work with DH and help him with his work.

We often discuss whether the llamas are awake yet, and apparently sometimes they have gone to parties.

I love the random conversations

DD and I had a long chat this morning about how if fish could fly then they'd get too dry in their nests. And last night in bed, she was very keen to know about the colour of every pair of pants I have ever owned. As I am forty, it was a bit hard to remember.

'Owls are nice' said DD the other night as she drifted off to sleep.

pmsl at the 'owls are nice'

I love the randomness

DD - I am a fish
Me - What sort of fish, darling?
DD - An Orange one
Me - Do you have a name?
DD - Dave Fish

This was a joke, one of DD's 'lots of new jokes'.

Why did the toothbrush cross the sink?
Because it wanted to cross the computer.

She also had a mini-tant today when I changed channels and I couldn't figure out "Mummy, put the bat back on".

Cricket... obviously!

"We can't eat this mummy" - points to rind of a lime
"Only dead people, like Pepples* can eat it"

*(our deceased cat)

I get 'I want a roary egg' every morning at the moment. I have no idea what a roary egg is. If anyone could enlighten me, I'd be very grateful

I had an odd conversation with my 4 year old earlier. He was telling me how a spider crawled up his willy when he was in the garden. I was totally . The conversation went of for quite a while before I realised it climbed up his WELLY!

spicemonster, it's eggs with the lion quality mark or whatever it is stamped on the side - has to be!

dd: I want a cat. It must be a girl cat because only girls have feelings.

Me: Boys have feelings!

dd: No they don't. Boys don't have feelings, Mummy. When I look at Edward's face [boy at nursery] I know he has no feelings at all.

Funnily enough, I reckon she's right about Edward.

Spicemonster, this is prob silly but... in one episode of roary he spills eggs on himself and it looks like fried eggs????

when DS was at pre-school

Mum, 38 unicorns came into our class today!

er

That's nice dear

Ds: Knock knock
Me: Who's there?
Ds: Robots
Me: Robots who?
Ds: Robots EVERYWHERE!

or, the other variation has the punchline of Robots and Mr Tumble Mama.....EVERYWHERE!

I think he is trying to warn us of a fate worse than death, a Mr Tumble/Transformers crossover.

We have been invited to a party with a princess and knight theme. I was explaining this to my 3 yr old He said "Can I go as a knight mummy?...please, pleae, I want to be a nightmare!"

Hee hee!

DD knows about stuffed animals, eg at the Natural History Museum, so on the way home from nursery the other day she stopped outside a clothes shop, looked up at the mannequin in the window, and asked,
"Mummy, is that a real lady, who's been killed?"

MarthaFarquhar

DD's friend: I have a new bed.

DD: Oh that's nice.

DD's friend: my old one is in the shed.

DD: is it ? .....Do you sleep in the shed ?

DD's freid: No, just my bed does !!

Dd picked up something from the floor, presented it to me and said solemnly, 'Mummy I have deduced that this is to small for dd2'

Mind you she told me a few weeks ago that I am very distinguished.

Its like living with Cecilia Johnson sometimes!

oh pleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeease do an experiment tomorrow morning with one Lion Standard Egg and one fried egg: please.

My toddler doesn't talk too much yet (22 months) but every morning without fail says:
Pepp'Pig! LoLo! Stairs!

Which means, clearly, 'Take me downstairs immediately, Mother, and breastfeed me while I crane sideways so I can watch the ToothFairy episode of Peppa Pig for the millionth time while stretching your nipple into Morph-like creations'

My two year old, whenever she sees a church says "Look mummy, it's a fairy castle far far away."

your stories are adorable.
My son (3.5 )asked every morning for "the clippers and the paste" with me confused, offering him various things (scissors... glue.. nail clippers etc).
After about a week I realised he wanted the BBQ tools.

No idea why but he plays with them every morning.

I also spent rather longer than I wanted to today explaining how baby animals drink from their mothers. According to DS, they drink from their mothers "nibbles". He wont believe me that horses and cow have udders, not "nibbles" LOL.

Apparently llamas are very naughty and eat 'sossy-beans'
where this one has come from I have no idea. And sossy-beans are sausages and beans. Apparently. Both myself and ds have spiders in our hair(curly) but daddy does not.(no hair)

Oh.. And we also have 'apple-daddy' and 'apple-nanna' but NEVER 'apple-mummy'. No idea why.

DD (25mo) was telling me this morning that she didn't need a fork with her milk

And everything is 'actually' atm. As in 'Actually mine. It's actually milk'. I blame bloody Lola!