Mumsnet County … name a place, street, shop or service

[WhirlyByrd]

Your challenge is to suggest names for the places, streets and shops that would make up the County of Mumsnet.

The city would be called Forum. Its suburbs: Boden (designer, very expensive), Hunbury Hills (flashy and a bit TOWIE), Cleek (gated community).

Pombear Palace Theme Park and P&C car park Ltd.

Lingerie shop called 'Judgy Pants'

The Attachment Parenting Velcro Factory...

The zoo would be a bit shit. Just some penguins, a bat and a nest of vipers.

A butchers called Naice Ham

A Pub called 'Terry Wogan's Cock' - with appropriate signage.

Local paper would be The Daily Wail, of course.

The hospital would have a Sporn department, where eager onlookers could watch and for a suitable fee could have a squeeze. A klaxon would sound to alert people that a real beauty had popped up.

A red light area called 'Pedant's Corner'

Rival Life Coaches called Jeremy Kyle and Matthew Wright.

It would have a river of sweetcorn running through it

Arf at River of Sweetcorn.

On that note, an Art Gallery displaying Cubes of Poo.

A furniture store called Twigs'n'Pebbles

at Cubes of Poo

and surely an installation of 'poo pouffe' and 'bobble plate' called something like 'futility'

A firm of solicitors called 'Leave, The & Bastard'?

There could be a bridge called trotters crossing over the river of sweetcorn!

There would be a restaurant that fed the entire sitting for the evening on one roast chicken.

Suggested name - 'Knives, Forks,Spoons'.

A fruit & veg shop called 'The Cutted-Up Pear'

A Fruit shop called cutted up pear

X post

Has anyone mentioned the patisserie yet? No name needed - just a sign .

I'm assuming that MNHQ would reside in a building a bit like the Disney castle?

I'll volunteer to run the "PFB Baby Group" in the village hall.

oooh!!

can i run the bookshop? please?

I think there would be an entire business park of fancy companies with acronyms for logos..... AIBU Inc., SAHM Ltd, PIV-R-Us and OTOH Industries.

Helicoper landing pad for nervous mummies?

Bitter - SFK. [stern]
do not let Piste see your post, she'll be running round jumping for joy!