Support thread for those experiencing or recently experienced a MC/MMC - Thread 6. ALL welcome!

[Sunbird24]

If you’re going through this, you’re not alone. I’ll post some links to support organisations shortly, but feel free to post, or just read, whatever you need.

@somethingluscious thank you☺️ hope tomorrow goes as okay as it can xx

@tulipsunday thank you🥰 I think trying again is the only thing that got me through to be honest, you need that hope xx

Thank you - our consultant called last night and said he could scan us on Monday, it’s funny how that whole one day less of waiting feels so significant! Had to go and get a prescription for more pessaries today, feels extra cruel to spend £20 on the revolting things! I’m glad I posted on this thread, it’s nice not to feel alone (although I’m so sorry that you’re all here too).

Does anyone have any recommendations for books/podcasts etc about miscarriage? I feel like I deal with all life’s problems by seeing if there’s a book about it so why not this…

@UnluckyCat23 I liked the worst girl gang ever podcast, think they have a book too, found them from Instagram! They have an episode for everything xx

@ChloeN - thank you! I saw their book during a quick browse earlier so glad to have it recommended.

@UnluckyCat23 so so sorry to hear this. I had an MMC where there was no heartbeat. Then the next week there was one! And then the next there wasn’t, so I waited 3 weeks for the surgery and it was very slow and painful. So I understand the limbo piece.

If you are having IVF to conceive, if you do decide to go again then could you have the embryos tested for chromosomal abnormalities? Especially if that caused your last MMC? I know they’re more common as we get older so I wonder what testing could be done for more peace of mind.

I think it’s easier said than done to have “cut off dates” in your head for these things, so maybe just don’t put pressure on and see how you feel after you get your negative test after this MMC to see how you feel?

@Hopefulhoney6 that’s what I’m worried about, that there’s going to be a week heartbeat again and the limbo keeps going. I’m sorry you had to go through it too, it’s awful isn’t it (I’m also realising, despite being a doctor (although not in a related specialty) how little I know about miscarriage/the process).

This is (probably, I suppose I shouldn’t write it off completely and cling on to the sliver of hope) my first miscarriage. Our first round didn’t work/ended in a negative pregnancy test - that was probably regimen related as round two produced more robust embryos and we have 4 frozen. I’ve got a friend going through the same thing with the same consultant (although she’s had multiple failed transfers) and they’re going down the chromosome route with her so they seem pretty on it re investigations; definitely something to ask about when we start thinking about trying again though so thank you.

We’ve got some provisional holidays booked this year (in August and September), I told my husband last night that once this is over I want to leave it until after those. I need time to heal and I need to get back on track at work (definitely taken my eye off the boil!). I’m only just 31 so hopefully time is as on my side as it’s ever going to be.

Hi ladies I had a MC 3rd January baby died around the 22nd I was 12 weeks when I actually miscarried.
Test still pos and boobs still sore but they scanned me and said they got it all out but 19mm of blood was there and will come out I’ve stopped bleeding but I’m so stressed out with it all.
Is this normal when will it go negative ? So worried about being messed with again thanks

@Tweetypie27 My easy@home hcg tests took about 2 weeks to become negative, but really it depends how high your hcg was. Mine was 15000 at 6 wks in September, then just under 8000 when I had medical management. Probably about a 24hr half-life. My body temperature was also elevated for a few weeks, but I ovulated at normal time the next cycle. This time hcg didn't get much above 5000 about a week ago. I have medical management though so that blocks and resets the hormones.

Hi @UnluckyCat23 …. Sorry I confused you with someone else (I thought you were writing a post but they were replying to you!!). On MCs and age!!

Sounds like you are getting all the right support from your IVF clinic. Good luck with everything and enjoy your holidays etc with your husband before starting again :)

Hi ladies. I can’t believe I am writing this again. I am 5 weeks today and have woken up to bleeding and some cramping. EPU have asked me to go in tomorrow for a blood test, and then again on Monday to see if HCG has risen. I’ve already accepted the worst following my 12 weeks MMC in September. I just knew it was too good to be true! I’m devastated. @ChloeN @tulipsunday

@Sophiey11 oh lovely I’m so sorry😔 are you still cramping and bleeding now or has it eased?x

@ChloeN it’s got worse now, quite a lot of blood :( xx

@Sophiey11 😔 have you been able to take some time away from work? Make sure you look after yourself 😢xx

@ChloeN yes I am currently on the sick and probably will be next week too till it passes. Just completely wiped out now. This is my 4th miscarriage and it’s just not getting any easier xx

@Sophiey11 oh I’m so sorry I didn’t realise you’d had multiple losses before your mmc, you must be so drained😭 xx

@Sophiey11 I am so so sorry to hear that after all you have been through. Here for support ❤️

@Sophiey11 really thinking of you 💐💐

and don’t expect it to get easier…. Each loss is a loss and I’m sure you are feeling very lost right now. X

Thank you all. I actually thought this was going to be my first successful pregnancy. I have been taking aspirin, my symptoms were a lot stronger this time compared to my previous pregnancy. But I guess I was wrong. I am only 28, so I know there is still time. I just don’t know how much to keep trying. On one hand I think no I’m not letting this get the better of me, I will keep fighting and have my baby. Then on the other hand I just don’t have it in me to keep going through this xx

@Sophiey11 when you’re ready could you afford to have some additional private investigations? Things like the natural killer cells and lactobacillus (www.tommys.org/research/research-topics/miscarriage-research/can-bacteria-affect-risk-miscarriage).

You are so young, so time is on your side xx

thinking of you @Sophiey11 we are all here to support in anyway we can xx

@Hopefulhoney6 I’ve had some done at a fertility clinic. They tested my blood, thyroid, hormone profile etc and they were all clear. I don’t think I had any of those so I’ll look into that too thanks.
@LAURAPAX thank you so much. This thread and the ladies on it were a massive help to me in September, so I’m lucky to have it all again now xx

@Tweetypie27 so sorry for your loss. It can take a couple of weeks for a negative test. Hopefully you can start to heal now that the physical part is complete x

@Sophiey11 totally know that feeling of wanting to continue but lacking the strength to potentially face it again. Like others say though time is definitely on your side. Was your partner tested at all when you had your tests? Have you been on progesterone? I know that can be useful for some x

@Sophiey11 they are both quite new tests (/ some doctors don’t believe in the NK cells) but there is a whole host of information online (google Dr Shehata and CRP Clinic) and I’m sure on mumsnet about both. and lots of people on Instagram with their stories. Look after yourself x