Headwreck & Hope. Support for those who are/might be experiencing MMC/MC/early pregnancy loss.

[mrsb0710]

Original threadtotal headwreck, empty sac 11 days ago, embryo 6wk there today

Support for those who are/might be experiencing MMC/MC/early pregnancy loss.

Just take one day at a time and see how you feel each day (hour!).

I haven't actually told people on here yet but I did want to conceive again quickly and I'm now about 5 weeks - scared shitless but hopeful. I didn't have AF after mc so not sure exactly how far along i am but just to let you know it is possible and you will have your baby x

Oh congratulations, keeping everything crossed for you!!!

Thanks for the link lill will have a look tomorrow, what does pm mean? X

daft sorry you've had to join us, I hope things go as best they can for you...im sure you will get your baby...its normal to feel like that at your stage, I think most of us probably have. Take care x

Congratulations lill I'm keeping my fc for the same news as you, 3 weeks post ERPC and in the ttw now, but will chat more about that on the thread you gave me...

There is always hope ladies xxx

Hi ladies.
My first time posting anywhere on the net, but this thread seems really supportive.

I have been ttc for 18months, and have been taking fertility drugs after having no periods, even on clomiphene my cycles were up to 90 days so felt like getting bfp was never going to happen. In jan I finally got it, only to mc naturally (very lightly) at about 5 weeks and my period never showed up again after. I'm now about 8 weeks pregnant again, (this time without the drugs) but am convinced I'm in early stages of mc again. :-(

Hate talking about all the details... But I first noticed some brown discharge tues evening, with tiny dots of red, since then I've had the same wed, not really anything thurs or fri day, a bit more fri evening and then slightly more red tonight (sat). Epu said they won't scan unless it gets worse as bleeding is do common. I've not had cramps, more slight ache and an aching back- like I would when I get af. I'm trying to stay hopeful but in my heart really think I'm losing it again. I haven't had many pregnancy symptoms at all, although my boobs still feel fuller.
I have an early dating scan booked for thurs next week, but really feel I need to prepare myself.
Has anyone else experienced a slow, light mc at 7-8 weeks?

Thank you (sorry for long post). Also lots of love to you all going through a horrible time xx

Hi faith. Sorry to hear you're going through this worry. I don't have any words of wisdom for you but didn't want to read and run.

As for me, I'm now having brown spotting when I wipe, but the bleeding hasn't started in earnest yet. I'm dreading it! I'm also dreading the scan on Monday. For five weeks I've been naively thinking scans are happy occasions, now I have to sit there with a tube poking round inside me while they confirm what we already know from blood tests.

So sorry to see more ladies on here!

Lill congratulations!

I have a question if anyone can help?! I had my erpc nearly 3 weeks ago and my bleeding stopped after 7 days of the op, was never heavy. This morning I have woken up and a bleeding. Much like a period? No pain etc could It be my period?!

I know it's so hard when you just want to be happy and excited for those occasions, but at the same time, any false hope is just going to make it tougher. I am thinking of u daft. It's so frustrating with all the tests and time it takes too.

It is definitely possible to conceive quite quickly after -my mc was around jan 20th then got bfp on 4th may quite unexpectedly.

Fingers crossed it goes as smoothly as possible this week, sending a big hug. X

Hello all, sorry to see more new ladies with us but I have found this thread so supportive so I hope you do too. Daft and Panda big hugs to you. Faith I know of lots of people who bled lightly through early pg with a healthy baby growing so I hope that is all you are experiencing.

Lilliana- congratulations I can only imagine the nerves you are feeling but I'm crossing everything for you.

I'm back to work tomorrow- in some ways I'm looking forward to it as I feel like I need to get back into life. I've barely left the house since the op on Weds so I'm going a bit stir crazy. On the other hand I feel really anxious too and worried about how I'll find it. A colleague is pg and will be due at the same time I would have been. She has her scan tomo so I'm expecting the news to be officially announced this week. I think I might just hide in a cupboard that day. I'm really worried all the jealous angry feelings I had for the first 3 years of dealing with the secondary infertility will come back. I really don't want to be that person again so I'm going to have to fight it.

Megan it could be your period. The consultant told me to count the ERPC as the first day of my cycle so that could be right- do you have short cycles? Can I ask about how your bleeding was in the week after the op? Mine was nothing much for the first two days and then yesterday it was more and brighter red. I also (sorry tmi) passed a few very small clots. I've read around info from hospitals in the Internet who seem to say its normal. My hospital gave very limited info about bleeding after. I feel fine, no temp and hardly any cramping. I'm just so paranoid about something being left there and having to have it again. Does it sound at all similar?

I can appreciate how difficult it must be TTC after mc paws . I am fearing mc happening again if we try and I have decided no scans until 12 weeks if we do conceive. . Hopefully in time things will become easier but I know it's no solace for how we are feeling right now.

re mc... unfortunely, the cramps did not stay as period cramps.

I woke at 4.30 this morning with contractions. No amount of tablets worked and sat on toilet for an hour. Sat in shower but pain became too unbearable. I could not sit still, or be quiet so woke DH and said I will need to go to hospital. Phoned Labour ward who said call an ambulance . Ambulance people said they wouldn't attend for an early Mc. Pain increased I started vomiting and feeling dizzy and I passed out so Ambulance called again. Crew were lovely and put me on gas and air which improved things slightly. I flooded and passed a clot which felt better for a while. Got to A&E thinking I was going to the labour ward but was told I would not be allowed as it was too early in pregnancy and I would have to stay in a cubicle on the major injury unit. I became so upset because I felt that they were not acknowledging my pregnancy loss. It felt so inappropriate with male patients left and right of me, me groaning and writhing in pain, no toilet inside the ward so had to walk outside flooding down my legs and having horrible contractions every few minutes.

I passed a few clots and things became more bearable and a nice female obstetrician doctor came and removed some clots from my cervix. I still haven't passed the sac. I was given opiates and I feel much better so have returned home with more meds and have been told to go back if medication doesn't cut it.

Purple my bleeding after was very light. Had one afternoon of it being heavier so you do sound normal to me.

My cycles beforehand were very regular, I was 28 days cycle. So this seems short. I was expecting from next Thursday onward at for period. Will just wait to see I think. X

Happy I ended up in a&e before I had my Erpc as It all happened naturally, I had the Erpc because after passing the sac etc my bleeding stop but I had horrendous pains and it turned out. I still had a 2.5cmclot insideabd I just wanted it all over.
I found a&e weren't compassionate at all. I was there 5 hours before I was seen!!

Thank u purple- trying to stay hopeful but not too hopeful if that makes sense, so hard to guess it as it seems everybody reacts so differently during pg and mc. I hope work is kind to u tomo.

Wifey that sounds awful, I hope the rest passes as easily as possible and u have a speedy recovery.

I hate all the waiting and not knowing how things will happen, but I guess that's just part of it. Stay positive ladies, if u can!

That must've been absolutely awful for you meganlilly .A&E was certainly not the best place - They seemed to be surprised that early Mc could be so painful until I saw the obstetrician. The ambulance crew seemed to be much better equipped and compassionate, they knew which position to put me in laying slightly upright with cushion nestled between back and knees and when I said sorry about flooding allover the bed they were incredibly kind and reassuring. They were also sorry for my loss. I understand the Trust, and in particular A&E is very overwhelmed at the moment but it's the little things sometimes that make all the difference - compassion and understanding is one.

Wondering what to do about work this week. I've not started miscarying yet. But should I get signed off?

I suppose it depends on how you feel coo . Doctor happily signed me off for 3 weeks whilst I waited for my delayed mc to start, but I decided to go back after 8 days on restricted duty due to boredom. However, I was not bleeding at all. As soon as I started spotting on Friday I went home. I started to cramp yesterday and I would not like to have been at work 40 mins from home (Tube or cycling) if this had happened at work. Everyone is different and it depends on how you feel, what you work as , how close you are to home, and how understanding your work is. Mine has been fantastic thank goodness but I understand not all companies are.

wifey and megan that's horrible, and i completely agree and understanding about a&e...i started to mc naturally with light bleeding, cramps gradually crept in, becoming so painful I got dh to drive me to hospital...too early to go to labor ward (10&5) so shoved in majors cubicle and given opiates. Male obst saw me, told me they could either keep me in on morphine or send me home with medical management, took the medical management option as after 5 days of progressive pain nothing was being passed. 24 hours after coming home from hospital the contractions increased as did the bleeding and I passed what I thought was everything (sack 10-12cm) including 3 large clots. Within 3 hours of increased pain/bleeding/passing, it all tappered off...
Phoned epu the next morning to tell them and the doctor advised me not to insert the pessaries (which I was supposed to 36-48 hours after taking oral tablet that softens cervix) doctor said, I had kinda done it naturally, that my body had contracted by itself, the oral tablet had softened the cervix which helped the 'passing'. And finally said, as I had seen everything pass then I didn't have to insert the pessaries.

Assumed that was it, went for scan 2 weeks later and had a 2-3cm of retained products...they packed me off home and told me to take the left over pessaries from the mmc 2 weeks ago. Inserted them which induced contractions again (no where near as bad as the night it happened) but had no bleeding?!!?

Went back to epu a week later and had my 6th scan,...still retained products...

All ended with an ERPC.

Bottom line is, I believe any pregnant women mc'ing should be allowed to go to the labor ward if they wish...not have to be in the major unit. Its like a disrespect to our lost babies, like we didn't qualify as a REAL pregnancy. Such an awful and prolonged experience.

Hugs to everyone going through the same xxx

Can either of you two compare the pain to labor for me? I'm interested to know if the pain is the same...after my visit to hospital I managed the pain very calmly at home when everything passed. I think when it all kicked off for real I had a panic attack which made the pain seem unbearable. But when I got home and the main bit happened, although very painful, I managed to remain calm and breath through it.... Is it similar to labor? I think I remember one of you two saying you had dc's xxx

wifey I hope you are ok? Try and stay calm, it sounds stupid but it really helps. I wanted to cry while it was happening, but knew it would intensify the pain. I tried to put aside the crying, telling myself that 'i could deal with that after this was over'. It strangly worked. Thinking of you x

Totally agree with you paws They really should allow us on the labour ward if we wish. I really feel for you - it sounds as though you have been through alot. It certainly made my pain so much worse having them tell me no to the labour ward I couldn't stop sobbing it cut so bad emotionally.

I still don't think I have passed the sac mine is only 5cm cubed on my previous scan form and all the clots I have been checking. They looked like liver though (TMI). I don't seem to be bleeding much now and no contractions, not sure if it's the pain killers stopping the bleeding. Also all my blood has been dark pink (except the black clots) even the flooding and heavy bleeding and I am wondering if it is normal?

paws when you had the ERPC do you have a general anaesthetic? Do you mind me asking what happens?

Paws! Ye I compare it to labour pains completely! I was told it was would be like stronger period pains it wasn't at all! They were so strong. The one night I was rocking myself crying as it was so painful.
The night I went to a&e the doctor did an internal but nod an. He told me to cancel my 2nd scan the following week as he was 100% sure it was over. Low & behold I kept my scan and I had retained products ending in the operation!!

I was extremely nervous about the GA but it was fine, I woke up feeling very relaxed was put for just over an hour in total. I just felt tired the following few days but no pain and minimal bleeding. Until today 3 weeks later bleeding is like a period, so I'm not sure if it is or not.

paws for me it was similar to contractions near the beginning/mid of labour, about 7/10 on the labour pain scale for me. I had a really difficult labour last time though 14 hrs of agony then epidural and caesarean. However, this was 18yrs ago I think they would probably not wait so long to give an epidural nowadays.

Wifey I'm so sorry that sounds awful. How are you feeling now? Hope the worst is over. Do you have a scan booked? Sorry got confused with others. Take care

allmy a pm is a personal message. You have an inbox and can send messages just to one person - a bit like fb messenger. Just put my username in the to box of you want to send me one

faith once my bleeding started it didn't stop even when it was just brown spotting. I have everything crossed for you but you sound very sensible not getting your hopes up.

Will be thinking of you tomorrow daft. Hope it goes ok. Wrt work they will sign you off - I would go with however you feel not how you think you should feel/do iyswim.

I am not cramping at the moment but I deffo have not passed the sac yet - only clots - my scan is not for 2 weeks. I am wondering if pain killers slow down the process somehow.

Wifey I feel so cross for you and I'm thinking of you. My GA was very much like Megan's, I was terrified but not as terrified as miscarrying naturally but it was all fine and I just felt really relaxed after.

I was saying to my friend that on the surgical ward I felt so cared for. I was helped to dress, helped to the toilet, checked every 30 mins. I know all of this was because of the GA but comparing it to the after care on the labour ward when I had ds 7 years ago it was totally different. There I felt more tired and vulnerable but was left alone unless I asked for help and was left to struggle to walk to get breakfast if I wanted it. The feminist in me thinks that was because birth and indeed miscarriage are now just seen as a fact of life and something women need to get on with. When in fact both can be and often are incredibly traumatic physically and mentally. I found this during my time in the EPU as well, people were kind but it was all dealt with as a fact of life when really you want someone to wrap you up and keep you safe because it's so awful. I'm sure if this happened to men it would be a different story.