anorak would be grateful for some friendly support

[anorak]

Further to chatting here I have realised that I am becoming depressed. I hope you don't mind my posting this thread asking for some day-to-day support for a little while. It would help me not to feel so alone. TIA xxx

think getting out of the house really helps, wish i could give you some good positive advice but unfortunatly im feeling a bit like this too so im not much use!! just wanted you to know i had been checking the thread and thinking about you x

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Feeling really down again. Trying to do lots of stuff with the kids to take me out of myself but I can feel myself drifting into depression-land.

Keep drinking lots of wine in the evenings and it doesn't help, but I don't seem to be able to talk myself out of it enough any more. My dh is really worried about me, I can tell, but I don't know what more he could do really. Look, the sun is shining and it's a lovely day but I just want to crawl into a hole and stay there

I'm with you on this today anorak - so won't be able to help lift your spirits. Sorry.

There are many lifestyle recommendations that can be made to lift your mood - but if you are utterly lacking motivation and feeling so low - that is the last thing you are up to doing.

I truly believe that all sypmtoms are there to show (and bring) what you really need. It seems you are crying out for someone to come and nurture you. (again, I truly believe that deep down - that person is you, yourself).

The best method I can think of to help get you back on track is homeopathy - because it treats the whole person (and in its theory, understands that most physical symptoms are the result of some kind of emotional blockage and so treats the emotional area quite dramatically), which is why I recommend it so highly. Would you consider going to have a consultation with a homeopath?

Hello Anoraksounds like very good advice from Fairican you find a local, very good homeopath in your area?

I'm getting by ok but I know I don't feel right inside.

You go through the day but it's all pretend. Inside I'm so sad. All the stuff that has happened is presenting itself to me and saying, hey! Now you're in a safe place you can really feel the effect of me!

It's grief for a lot of stuff that's happened in the last few years. I hide. I dirge through the day. I manage ok with other people around to distract me. My kids are confused with my behaviour, I think. My husband is worried and perplexed.

I'm taking the tissue salts and I somehow feel they are helping more than anything else - I can't explain why, but they are. Thank you fairi, I didn't even know they existed before. xxx

Anorak - you've been through a lot in the last few years haven't you? - the posts about your dd I remember were just part of it.

I had a tough time with my dd (not the same but a similar result) - she was very sick and when things started to get better I fell apart. I took St John's Wort for a while, didn't take the diazepam the doctor prescribed but did go with the exercise stuff which others have mentioned here - I'm still pounding the streets some years on and it has been a saviour to me I have to say.

Someone once said to me 'if you feel crap say so'.....I'd got into this habit of saying 'fine' when anyone asked how I was coping and I was just kidding myself. Offload it - I know that's what you are doing here to some extent - sometimes you just have to stop fighting against it 'cos it sapping your strength and stopping you from getting better.

its soooooo much about self image isn't it. becuase i read on mumsnet of a strong woman who overcomes great difficulty and one who i absolutley fking admire! your just fab.

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Thank you girls. Custy you can't know what it means to me to have you say that about me - those words are exactly what I think of you.

Yes, essbee, guilt is all part of the equation, isn't it? I don't feel guilty for feeling like this but I do feel guilty for giving in to it, lounging about, being short-tempered and drinking too much.

I know I couldn't let myself grieve at the times when all these things happened, my family needed me to keep them together. Now is my time to grieve for my lost uncles and the dear old man next door, for my daughter's crap childhood and lost innocence, for my husband's health and the rift with his parents, for the cruel words I endured from them, and all the rest of it. I just went through it all on automatic pilot and now that's switched itself off, it's making me feel it, all the sadness and grief. I just have to feel my losses now and get through them.

What does help as an experienced depressive is that I know where I am on that journey, I can visualise it and I know that although I'm not sure just how long it's going to be, I'm certain that it does come to an end, because I've been here before.

I just need you guys to hold my hand till I get there. xxx

hi Anorak
i've been away so only just seen this. So sorry that you are feeling this way honey. There are so many people ready and willing to hold your hand hon'.
Big love - TC x

Here for you Anorak--I'll hold your hand anytime!

(((hugs)))for Anorak. Read your thread last night.. life sucks at times doesn't it.. but you sound such a lovely, warm, head-screwed-on-right lady (and have thought so in the past from your posts) that I know you will get thro this.. as do you.

SJ x

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How are you feeling anorak?

How are you feeling anorak?

Hi

Sorry have not been mumsnetting much as I find I don't have much to offer at the moment.

Another big bust up with dh last night. Have to work through my feelings. He's beginning to understand I think. But it's all so thoroughly exhausting and really is taking its toll on me physically. Some days I look like a panda.

anorak - why do you think you have to have something to offer to be here? Sometimes you can take you know - from Mumsnet and from people in RL.

well said prufrock - anorak you are valued here whatever you are feeling about yourself.

I quite agree - you need to receive for a change - I think you've been soo used to giving and caring that you've forgotton how to receive. You can't to one effectivly without the other - so maybe thats contributing to you feeling like you have been. Why not take your first step doing this on Mumsnet - don't go on-line and feel guilty for not offering support - let all of us help you. Once that feels more comfortable, you may feel ready to take the art of receiving another small step further.

We are here to lean on each other and help each other - which all of us do, just our timing is not always the same (which makes it work so well!) So just allow yourself to be selfish for a while - we are rewarded by lending our support to you now, without any kind of return from you.

Lots of love from all of us.
ps - give yourself a big hug - you may feel silly, but do it alone, put your arms around your waist and give a loving squeeze - you'll surprise yourself how good it feels!

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