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Original poster

Please someone help me

141 replies

solowpleasehelp · 05/09/2024 18:19

I'm so low I don't know where to turn. Having strong suicidal thoughts. Please can someone talk to me I just need to feel less alone for 5 minutes

OP posts:
NonsuchCastle · 06/09/2024 06:02

I have to go to bed now - I am in the USA at the moment. But others will be along soon to be with you and listen to you. xxx

Concernedabouthubby · 06/09/2024 06:11

Hi OP As you can see from my other thread, my husband is going through the same thing. My children have another loving parent, but I absolutely know they would not be better off without him. Deep down, I think he knows that, and so do you. Also, how great will it be to see how theyvturnbout and what they do with their lives?
They would not recover from it. The man who left you is absolutely not worth it. He is abusive, and if he's blocking you, then good riddance. Would you be able to go to work and tell someone how you feel or get to the gp when your DD has gone to school?

Wimbledonmum1985 · 06/09/2024 06:16

A nice hot cup of tea and some toast sounds lovely. Sit and enjoy the quiet before the busy day starts. Today is a new day my friend and you are here. Sending strength.

FrostFlowers2025 · 06/09/2024 06:20

What might help is to look at your situation as though it were happening to a friend of yours. How would you behave towards that friend going through this? That is a first step to make. Treat yourself with compassion and remember that depression lies to you. It distorts the truth, it amplyfies anything you see as negeative and makes it look ten times as bad as it actually is and it hides all positive things from you.

But first, baby steps. Make sure you have enough to drink and to eat and get rest. Remember that if a friend deserves that then so do you.

BulldogMumma · 06/09/2024 06:54

OP call in sick today and try and get an appointment with your GP.
Suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem and I promise you your children will not be better off without you, it will damage them for the rest of their lives.
Drink your tea and collect your thoughts. Things may seem bleak now but nothing is forever, this will pass

whoscoatsthatjacket2012 · 06/09/2024 09:24

We're all still here for you. Any time night or day someone will be here.
Keep talking to us.

NetflixAndKill · 06/09/2024 09:49

Hey, how you getting on? Are you going to book a GP appointment babe?

PaillettenBedeckt · 06/09/2024 10:06

I'm not sure you should be in work today.

I hope you've managed to eat something. I've been really ill in the night and I haven't managed anything since the day before yesterday either. I'm poorly anyway, but it's really making me feel shaky. So please try your best to have some tea and nibble some toast.

Would you be able to book a GP appointment?

Original poster
solowpleasehelp · 06/09/2024 12:33

Hi everyone, just wanted to check in as I'm so grateful to those who took the time to post and support me, it means so much. I'm at work today and I'm trying my best to get on and use it as a distraction, which does seem to be helping to an extent. My head is still all over the place with regard to my relationship, I don't know what to do about that. He doesn't seem remotely sorry or bothered about any of it. My thoughts are just spinning constantly.

OP posts:
PaillettenBedeckt · 06/09/2024 13:51

Has he contacted you at all?

This is what MN is for. I've had my own thread going through the night about my woes. There's always someone to lend a friendly ear or give whatever advice they can.

I really hope you've managed to eat something.

TicketyBoo11 · 06/09/2024 17:25

Hiya
Just checking just checking in. How are you feeling today, you got to work - that’s brilliant. It would have been so easy to call in sick but you didn’t. Look how strong you are..x
Draw a line under yesterday and that no good man.. Today is the first day of the rest of your life. All the good things are out there waiting for you. Keep talking..x

LankyLana · 06/09/2024 18:10

Well done for getting into work - glad it can be a helpful distraction.
You could try posting on the relationships board here for support thinking about your relationship. When you are ready and can get your thoughts together.
Meanwhile the lovely thing about mumsnet is that there are always people here for a virtual hand hold or hug.
Do take care of yourself. Are you working this weekend or able to have a rest?

NonsuchCastle · 06/09/2024 18:16

You made it to work, that's brilliant - as you say it's a little bit of distraction for you.
I really respect you for asking for help. That was a brave thing to do and the right thing.

Remember to breath and drink tea and water. And you must try to eat - not a full meal if you can't, but nibble on something. Big hugs.

LankyLana · 07/09/2024 07:27

How are you doing OP?

MsGoodenough · 07/09/2024 15:18

How are you OP. I am also a suicidal mum and I know my DD did better off with me than without me, even though my despair is telling me otherwise. We can get through this day OP. Xx

UmbrellaEllaEllaElla · 07/09/2024 16:55

solowpleasehelp · 06/09/2024 12:33

Hi everyone, just wanted to check in as I'm so grateful to those who took the time to post and support me, it means so much. I'm at work today and I'm trying my best to get on and use it as a distraction, which does seem to be helping to an extent. My head is still all over the place with regard to my relationship, I don't know what to do about that. He doesn't seem remotely sorry or bothered about any of it. My thoughts are just spinning constantly.

Congratulations on making it to work. How are you doing? X

PaillettenBedeckt · 07/09/2024 16:58

MsGoodenough · 07/09/2024 15:18

How are you OP. I am also a suicidal mum and I know my DD did better off with me than without me, even though my despair is telling me otherwise. We can get through this day OP. Xx

Oh sweetheart. I'm sorry you're feeling like this. It's awful when you get those dark thoughts.

I hope you're looking after yourself xx

Mayyay · 08/09/2024 10:28

How you doing OP? Thinking about you

DreamyCyanFinch · 08/09/2024 10:31

Your kids need you.They kove you of course they woukdn't be bettwr off without you.You're on their side, nobody does that better than you.Things will improve, they can't be this bad always.
How are you today?

Original poster
solowpleasehelp · 08/09/2024 13:12

Hi everyone, sorry I haven't checked in for a day or so. I've been up and down to be honest. I phone Samaritans last night and spoke to a lovely person for the best part of an hour. It helped just to get everything out of my head. I don't feel quite as acutely distressed anymore and the suicidal thoughts have eased. I've actually had a lovely couple days with DD (the younger one) just pottering about , she lifts my spirits so much. Adult DD has been away all weekend with her friend but shes due back this evening so it will be lovely to have her back home too.

Thanks to all those who took the time to check in, it's appreciated more than you know. And to others who are feeling low at the moment, I do hope you're able to find some peace soon x

OP posts:
Cece54 · 08/09/2024 13:16

Excellent to hear.... the only way is up and you'll get there. You did great .... you're stronger than you believed....

LankyLana · 08/09/2024 21:09

So glad to hear you've had a lovely couple of days with DD- just what you needed. Hope you're having a lovely evening with your adult DD now xx

twohotwaterbottles · 08/09/2024 22:23

So glad you have had a decent couple of days with your DD. There will never be more , some shitty ones in there but then more good ones again. You've got this OP x

NonsuchCastle · 09/09/2024 03:47

So very glad to hear you are doing a bit better.

To the other suicidal mum - please let us know how you are doing and consider phoning the Samaritans. If you don't know what to say just say "I don't know what to say" - they will take it from there. Massive hugs to you.

Isittoolatea · 19/09/2024 18:16

I don’t want to be here anymore . My life has gone to shit this year . I can’t stop thinking about suicide . Please don’t ask me to contact Samaritans I find them patronising . I have suffered with my mental health for a good 3-4 years but now it’s at its worst . I’ve lost everything I’m done