Please someone help me

[solowpleasehelp]

I'm so low I don't know where to turn. Having strong suicidal thoughts. Please can someone talk to me I just need to feel less alone for 5 minutes

I don't think they would send the police. The website says they'll work with you on a plan to keep you safe.

I'm adding my voice to offer some support. I have had some dark days in my life and will always be on antidepressants. My children stopped me from thinking about suicide. I knew the damage it would do to them for the rest of their lives. Children don't need a perfect mother, or a perfect family. They need a mother who loves them. You are that mother.

Keep going and remember nothing lasts forever. I know you feel hopeless now but I promise you won't feel hopeless forever.

I urge you to reach out for real life support. It is out there and you don't need to suffer.

I'll be thinking of you. Keep updating and talking. There'll be someone online all night. You're not alone.

You stood up to an abusive partner - that takes real guts. I think you have more strength than you know.

I've been there OP. Looking back, the suicidal thoughts were like a huge wave crashing over me. They felt unstoppable but in fact they receded fairly quickly. Hang in there. Xx

We are here. You are not alone.

You can and will get through this OP. You are so precious to your children. We are all here with you. Sending you a hug and a handhold, well done for seeking help and being strong

I am Googling how many propranolol I need to end it all. God this is horrendous. I've only taken 2. I wish I could take this away

Please be kind to yourself, you are not a failure and your children need you. You've been sold a lie by the man you placed your trust in, shame on him. Abusive men don't discriminate, it can happen to any woman to literally any woman.
You feel unworthy because that's how he's made you feel. Please stay strong, one day very soon I hope you feel the relief that comes when you realise your life will be so much happier and lighter without the constant chip chipping away at your self worth. You will see life in a new light.

Right now he's exerting his control by blocking you as he knows you have seen through him so he's trying to unsettle and unbalance you, don't let him.

Please keep yourself safe, I have been there too, this moment will pass.

Is there someone you can give the propranolol to, to help keep you safe right now?

Can you text one of your mates and just ask them to keep the propranolol for you until tomorrow?

@solowpleasehelp you are there for them, regardless. Even when the dad is being an absolute shit you are the one constant thing in their lives. It shows too, with your eldest bringing you tea and toast. You are raising thoughtful kind children. And that is very special indeed. Sending you the biggest of hugs 🫂 💐 🙏 ❤️. Please contact me via direct message if you want to talk x

gosh I wish I could come and sit with you and give you a huge hug, honestly your babies need you (adult or not she’s still your baby!) you’re raising such warm, well rounded individuals and that’s all from you!
my friend ended his life the day I was in labour with my first, I wish all wishes he’d asked someone, anyone, for help, and so do his sons who miss him every single day, not one of us is better off without him.

please call a friend to come and be with you, please - I promise; they will.

Oh honey.
Put yourself in their shoes and sit with the feeling they might have if you weren’t here for them.
You are not alone. You will come back from this.
Your children sound lovely, they are a product of you and your influence. We are our children’s role model, their inspiration and their guiders through life. They need you 💐

The Samaritans won't call the police i used to volunteer with them they don't intervene unless you ask them to. So sorry you are feeling this way it's panic setting in after confronting him, I've been there and it feels the worst in the world, this is why people carry on in awful situations as it feels safer than the fallout... but although it feels absolutely horrendous right now I can promise you there is a brighter future and a stronger you on the other side and it will be the best thing you ever did for yourself and your kids. Keep going we are all here for you xxx

How old is your youngest child, are they a boy or a girl?
Have you been able to contact anyone yet for real life support, if not, please consider doing this straight away.

When I'm feeling down I cuddle up to DD when she's sleeping and just breathe in her hair. It really helps make the shit feeling go away.
I know you feel shit now but you will get over this man.
Your kids would never get over losing you. ❤️

I agree, it really is the best feeling in the world isn't it, just looking at their little peaceful faces when they are asleep. You realise how precious they are and how much they need you.

Your children need you, your little one needs you to be there for them in the morning.

Don’t be so bloody stupid. That’s not happening. I think you’re knackered from all the crying and your emotions are everywhere. Get to bed and it will all look brighter in the morning. If you still feel the same way, book an urgent appointment. You can’t go through this alone. You will not be burdening your friends. Imagine if something did happen and they weren’t aware? The guilt it would riddle them with? I’m talking from experience here. Please

Don't. Think of the emotional legacy for your children who will forever believe that you didn't love them enough to stay.

It feels awful I know, but it's not always this bad, this intense.

See the GP and slowly you can get there.

Yes. Yes. Yes. It's abusive and I tell you what, he'll be back! Because that's what they do! You need to get yourself strong and not take him back. HE is not the only thing that can make you feel better. YOU are.

Are you really going to allow this b***d to take you from your children?! No!!

You are going to be feel better. I promise you. I've been where you are and you are worth the self love and care to get better, get away from this man and build a new life for yourself. Everything is temporary and you are at a low point but this too shall pass.

Small steps at a time, one foot in front of the other. Your children need you. They love you. The world will be a lesser place without you in it. So please do not let it be so.

Please phone a friend. If not for yourself right now then for your children and for the you of the future who will look back and be so thankful that you've gotten better.

❤️

Everything looks better in the morning. It really does. Try to rest and face the day tomorrow with a fresh head. Phone a friend tonight and phone the GP in the morning. 🌺

I hope you're getting some sleep now.

Sorry I've been really ill this evening and I couldn't reply earlier. I've been worried about you.

I barely slept last night. I woke every couple of hours panicking, sitting bolt upright thinking there was someone in the house, I could see shadows and hear the floorboards creaking. I've had so little sleep I feel horrific. What's happening to me 😢 I have to somehow face work today, how??

I also haven't eaten since lunch time yesterday, my stomach is tied in knots. I can't face anything. I'm just trying to sip a hot sugary cup of tea.

Good, you are getting some liquid in your body, that's good.
You got through the night. You feel scared but you are still here and things will get better.
Do you think you can face going to work?
Please, if you can, keep talking to us so we know you're alright and you are not alone.