Keziah, City, Choc et al support thread

[Keziahhopes]

Hi - found us a new home. Just didn't like the title of my old thread - and have found your support so helpful but would also like this thread to be less egocentric .

Choc -hope cbt assessment goes well.

City - how are you doing?

My physio exercises are helping me, but don't see stroke consultant until beginning of July. Still not had OT assessment, but dont' think will need it by then - just been horrible for dh to do everything for me since Easter. Now more independend - just had my first shower by myself!!

Hi all. I am currently sat on my sofa eating jaffa cakes and watching location location. I had an appointment with my therapist this morning. Straight afterwards I went home sobbing and called my mum, who is coming on a mercy mission from the countryside later. But it is really what I need. I am seeing my psychiatrist on Thursday so hopefully this is just a blip. I have to remind myself that my downfall is pretending everything is ok. Does that sound familiar to anyone?!

Keziah, what's your due date? I am valentine's day! I already have 2 dc, 6 and 5, who have been with me through the worst time in my life and I adore them. So bad mental health + dc is v doable.

To all, I think chocolate is definitely a cure for bad mental health (although sadly its effects only last a brief nano second). I am coming to the conclusion that there really is no cure, but that you learn your triggers and get help before it really gets bad. That is so easy to say when you are a good spell, but feels like mountain everest in a bad spell. Perhaps threads like these are just part of the sticking plaster that gets us through the shit times.

lw

Evening. Soooo city has been completing overdue tasks (??), Keziah has worked her 2 hours sitting down - really hope you kept to your compromise K , luckywinner has stuffed her face with jaffa cakes in front of tv and choc has attended her meds review (which actually wasn't too stressful but I know which of the above activities I'd rather have been doing, lol!).

Ok staying positive...psych has made a couple of changes to meds (upped the venlafaxine and replaced the diazepam - not suitable for long-term use blah blah - with quetiapine) and discharged me back to my gp. I'm bit nervous about the Q but I did say I would try anything!

Hope tomorrow brings us a stress-free day . I'm fit for not much else tonight xx

Hi Choc - yes, I stuck to my 2hrs on monday sat down ( but can't say the same for Tue!!).

Glad you discharged back to gp. Upping venlaflaxine sounds sensible as I was told it worked different ways at different levels of dose. I have been on all levels . Quetiapine - well, gosh!! My psychiatrist tried me on it but I know I was going through IVF and it can raise prolactin levels which means ivf not going to work so never had more than a week of it!! But I had another drug from the same family which was rispiredone which I used to take for up to two weeks at a time when struggling ... it is not usually used like that but that was what was suggested (to diazepam) and to be honest it made me so numb that it did its job. If you don't like the Q then ask for alternatives.... if it is a low dose it should help. I know someone who has venlaflaxine and mirtazipine as a combination instead which works for them for instance.

sorry for no more for now - off to dentist now for check up (joy!!!)

So sorry to have been away yet again but yes choc , not completing very many tasks and need to be in bed as not achieving much & am making health condition worse - been zonked out all year cos haven't rested enough ..

Been thinking of you both & so glad you've had medication review - but as far as I know quetiapine is very strong & can totally knock you out .
If you haven't taken first dose , can it be split at all ? Think they're not supposed to be crushed - I recall another poster oon mh trying to start with a reduced dose so will see if can find thread

Did psych talk you through side effects , so you could give informed consent , rather than accept his / her recommendation ? Guess you must feel you have no option , with the struggle you've been having

It worries me that people are having these drugs "added in " for "resistant" depression without being encouraged to read & talk through more info . I know I'm not helping here , sorry , but have reservations about the way you're being treated , even if psych is very sincere in saying his / her patients have good experience with quetiapine . Hope you felt properly listened to , & I know you've agonised about whether to take any meds at all - obviously very positive that you're so open to trying new things < fret fret >

Very good to see you , Keziah < wags finger in dismay at your overly mobile work yesterday > < wraps cottonwool round K very tightly in speedy manouevre , binding firmly to chair >

I knew you'd have wise words for choc.
Hope you treated yourself after horrid checkup - hope all OK . At least you hopefully get a holiday from charges < doesn't help to cheer up scary visit > I must go and register at a nrew practice next week but just writing physical health stuff on the form makes me cry (!)as they never seem to grasp it - have you found same ? Sorry if don't want to answer ) ...& sorry to be such a horrible , horrible grump this week .

Hope you feel a bit better today , luckwinner My honest answer to your question of are we prone to pretending things are OK is no , absolutely impossible to pretend - is all too obvious But of course it's very bad for your mh to try to hide feelings for prolonged periods to spare others, so I hope you're working towards breaking that habit

Also , getting help when feeling self sinking has not been an option for years & years now , as always told am "too complex" & can't afford private therapy as am not able to work due to disablities < brings us all down into her grump >
Hope you haven't got much longer to go with cast on broken arm ? Must be painful & tiring
< comforting hot drinks all round >

joins city in her grump. Mine however is work based, due to a manager at work emailing everyone what is in his opinion my error. In actual fact I have done xyz totally correct but he is still saying I haven't. So I have now emailed EVERYONE he told I had done something wrong with my argument about why it is right.... can't say what it is here, but put it this way I told him in no uncertain terms that if he insists on my changing zyx then he is actively discriminating against people who have a registered disability. Ignoring the fact his own guidelines he sends out on how to do zyx actually back up how I did it.

Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr................................................... I am sure writing very long, frustrated email is not good for me. Am seriously tempted, for first time ever, to go to Gp to be signed off until maternity leave starts due to him stressing me out. Then someone else would have to not only change what he says are my mistakes but also do LOTS nad LOTS of work that is similar that has to be done that I otherwise do as it is my job to do (but not till set dates). And pregnancy related issues can't count against you for absence purposes and I have a very high risk pregnancy so that is NOT an issue!!!!!

Right, how do I calm down as no medication allowed for me at all?????????????????????????????????????????????????? And of course the NHS would never go as far as to give me a therapist, have no family that care whatsoever and don't mention phonelines as I am deaf!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

See - grumpy I am. Not with you city but with life and unfairness and with inequality.

Ok so am I the only one who has had a stress-free day?! (The night was a different matter though but more of that later). I'm sending out hugs and chocs for you both city and Keziah to banish the grumps . Sorry to hear about work K but a very small part of my brain seems to think you are already on maternity leave (even though I know that's not the case). I'd like to think of it as a sign but also I'm often thinking about your high risk pregnancy and how amazing you've been throughout despite the undeniable anxiety etc. From where I'm sat keeping your feet up permanently doesn't sound such a bad idea (though you obviously love your job unlike me and so would miss it terribly etc ). Hope you've managed to calm down. (Btw I thought the bit about discriminating against people etc was priceless!!)

Now city I'm going to do a bit of finger-wagging in your direction. I'm saddened to learn you've been aggravating your health condition. Tasks can wait as it sounds like you've been pushing yourself too hard and all that wild partying has caught up with you! I will be checking up on the time of your posts and sending you stern warnings if I see you posting late when I consider you should be in bed resting . Seriously, having survived the year on variable levels of rest with no physical health conditions I can only imagine the consequences of not enough on you . Repeat "I must take better care of myself before helping others" .

Thanks for the wise words on the quetiapine. Actually after posting on here last night I decided to google it ( yes I know I probably shouldn't have done that - well at least not until this morning) and this caused a stressful night with very fractured sleep. Grrrrr!!! city, no the psych didn't talk through any side effects other than "I might feel groggy" the following day when I start taking it. Now I'm about it and really don't think I'll be taking it, well certainly not until at least I've tried the increased V dose. I don't like the fact that I'm supposed to take it daily, I mean how am I supposed to know when my anxiety is improving if I'm taking it all the time? Also I don't like the fact that I'm supposed to start taking it at the same time as increasing the V. I (still) much prefer diazepam (I'm sounding like a stuck record ) which I can take as and when required. Also, diazepam has been around for donkeys years and Q not. I don't want to be a guinea pig! I might consider the Q if I can take it as and when required but I'd need to ask psych whether that's possible - obviously I hadn't known to ask this at the appt. (Interesting Keziah that you were taking rispiredone in this way). In a way I do feel like I have no option but maybe increased V is the plan A and adding Q plan B? It does worry me too about the AD 'top-ups' city, so don't fret that you're somehow 'not helping' by voicing your concerns because as I said last night I had similar frets . Talking therapy was discussed (he actually brought it up, yay!) and bizarrely (I must have been having a rather good day, lol!) I said oh I've had so much this year already < choc wishes she could have shared out her allocated therapy between city and Keziah > then proceeded to tell her exactly what I'd had . She agreed that it was a lot and concluded that more wouldn't be beneficial atm and I agreed . Our brains work in mysterious ways don't they.

< choc waves to luckywinner. Hope your psych appt goes ok Thurs >

Oh dear gods Keziah , so sorry didn't see this till now .... hope you're in a peaceful sleep by now , but sending calming thoughts . Am sure you would be well justified to do that and was wondering if dared suggest it anyway
and you know how I favour "telling it like it is" - does no good in the long run to pretend all is well

Hope good day , choc , & not too knocked out if started new prescription

Peaceful nightxxx < tries not to fret for anyone >
< fails but hopes all will be well >

Wow city another of our spookily posted-at-same-time replies . No I'm not knocked out - I'm actually rather awake! I don't start new meds until I see GP again for prescription. Anyway, you should be resting xx

choc glad you googled Q. I didn't want to post what I really think of it, as not for me to put you off - but I for one refused to take it!! Risperidone for a week or 2 was enough. If you look what it is usually prescribed for I think you will find it is not a replacement for diazepam!! I agree doing plan A first sounds wise, as upping V might be all you need with the odd dose of Diazepam first.

Argh argh argh , so sorry I didn't see your post , choc , truly I didn't , and for not replying properly to Keziah's post before zonking .- just wanted to say best of luck to her for today but didn't even manage to do that , so sleepy have I been < snail >
Another one here feeling fortunate to have had an OK day yesterday , & hoping madly positive developments in Keziah's workplace situation

Magnificent advice as usual from Keziah , choc , so sorry for sleepless night after googling . Given that your informed decision is different now you have somew actual facts as opposed to psych's opinion / experience / what her nhs managers are constraining her to do , do you feel you might want to say to your GP that you weren't necessarily thinking straight at the appt , felt under more pressure at the meds review than you realised - as have had such a bad couple of months - & could does GP she not think you might be able to request talking therapy after all ? Our brains do indeed work in mysterious ways when under great pressure ..

How could the psych have said you've had a lot of therapy this year , beneficial , blah blah blah - what is she missing here ? [confused } ( rhetorical q , am not asking for details ! ) .
I do realise you might meet some resistance about not wanting to take the Q , let alone hoping for a store of diazepam for emergency ( something I would like myself ) , but it doesn't seem unreasonable to say to GP there seem to have been misunderstandings at the appt , & can anything be done ?

Absolutely gutted that you're having this massive stress at work , Keziah ... imagine it can't be good for your pg risk factors for you have your blood pressure raised etc . Very impressed that you felt up tostating facts to manager & colleagues , and hope you don't feel traumatized by today's events . As you say , union advice or similar not accessible to you , so I hope the correct course of action seems clear today , or that you can access suitable resources < sinking feeling >

Seems to me you'd be justified asking to go sick because you are , physically , & this drama and the manager's utter disregard for your health are aggravating your mental & physical health issues. I've been wondering this weekwhether to actually be rude enough to suggest it , & choc obviously knows the physicalstrains of pg in a way I don't , plus the effects on emotional & mental health .
From experience of own more mundane physical condition , my alarm bells have been ringing for your hardworking body this last couple of weeks so I hope you get some options over the work situation .

Where do I even begin to tell you how much I agree on the inequality & discrimination . Thought I knew a bit about disability discrimination but the little I know of your experiences makes me speechless . I feel some people experience conflicting , even hostile feelings around an intelligent person with impairments
.
Devastating you lack family support & are being majorly stressed by family . I have often seen families discriminate with absolute impunity against members with impairments , mh being a favourite "target" , of course . Am sure you & choc know more than me about the theory of role allocation within families , scapegoating etc . I do notice families sometimes simultaneously reject that family member & rely on them to do hard emotional work in the family

There's also the small matter of being penalised in terms of work / access to legal services / welfare state / housing /relationships / childcare / education pensions / taxes ..there are a couple of threads on here that might allow you to enlighten people or find others who understand < sorry for OTT rant >

(as to "life" , Keziah ... why do relatively few people seem to get hammered over & over & over .... I am convinced there is another , "bigger" life , & that "good" spirits or suchlike try to help who they can ( I know ) , but why so much pain ?)< cheery >

Thank you so much choc - I feel very looked after & fussed over after reading your kind words Thank you for your generous support this week , & please take care of yourself as you urge us to .

< breaks open the Christmas hamper to share round >
< turns into a stollen >

Ooh Christmas hamper, yummy!!

Think I am very fragile this week so it is coming out in all ways. Cried most of this afternoon and when dh came home. Going to blame this to:

• pregnancy hormones
• being on no medication (missed diazepam too!!)
• doing too much after a tougher year than I want to accept (think you right there city)

It is easy to do too much. So, note to us here - rest, rest, rest - as much is possible with our lives!!!

Just a quick wave from me - I'm head-wrecked today.

Result: we are all in agreement with the Q. "If you look what it is usually prescribed for I think you will find it is not a replacement for diazepam!!" Keziah, that is so true and I hadn't looked at it like that before. Now I can see it's like using a sledge hammer to crack an egg so will definitely need to remember this when I see gp. Yes I'm expecting a degree of resistence city. So seems I'm back to my original battle to get diazepam < choc yawns >.

city I truly hadn't (and probably still don't) appreciated the huge wider difficulties experienced by people with physical disabilities . Although I have noticed in recent times how this current gov seems hell bent on making things even worse instead of better! I mean how do you go about changing that?

I truly hope you're both resting - sorry to sound llike a stuck record - I might try it myself

Ok weekend of rest for us all prescribed. Along with hot drinks, tv, yummy food that needs little cooking, people in our houses behaving (whether dh/dd it makes no difference) and more treats from city's hamper!! My dh wants to go to Ikea though - so don't see that as restful unless I can persuade him to go alone

choc you might find other meds to help anxiety more mid-term, I had one beginning with p, ummm what was it? Anyway it was fine, not like Q and gp prescribed it to me. That and real help, whatever that is for you as medication (I think) is what we use to cope with and allow ourselves to function whilst we recover.

choc when your gorgeous dd is being less than gorgeous and exhausting for 2 days in a row, I would say that is what it is like having a disability that limits you (so you are an expert in exhaustion, things not been done etc just like us!!)

Aarrggghhh dd hit a girl at school today (all because said girl wouldn't be her friend! ). I cried so joining you with the hormones Keziah. I don't know what to do with her < feel like wanting to wring her bleeding neck > I'm really trying but I can't face her teacher having yet another talk with me next week .

Oh well at least Keziah made me laugh with her post . Rest, rest, rest and more cotton wool to stop you from breaking. Hopefully pregnancy hormones will come in useful during labour for a nice painfree birth .

Ooh I love Ikea . But haven't been since I was 7 months pregnant. No way was it restful!

Are you thinking of propranolol (think that's how you spell it)?

< choc off to scoff some more of city's treats >

< waves to choc & Keziah > will be back in a bit to post , but want to say goodnight ... so sorry about dd stress , choc ... you'll be able to smile about it with her when she's a well - adjusted adult ...

Am fretting that you did go to the Maze , Keziah - I fell asleep dozed off before managing to warn you of the horrors ... ners tell of 6 hours at a time trapped in there , with only bleeping meatballs for sustenance . Everyone's doing Xmas shopping , too < genuinely worried for your health >

< supportive vibes for choc > Hope you have been very kind to yourself ... wish you could have a couple of hours doing something that would refresh you a bit . Hope you've had the glorious sunshine we've had here

Have been out too much when I wanted to be following Keziah's prescription of rest... felt obliged to go to support a political performance thing nice aquaintances organised , which was brilliant , then friend asked for support with short - notice demo on the impact of the govt cuts on women < uber - pretentious emoticon > Some had wore & we did a chanty demo , handed out lots of cake & had a teaparty on town hall lawn ... embarrassing but useful & noisy on a busy shopping day

Hope you feel steadier , Keziah , though am not surprised if you're not , as
you've been coping so intently you probably need to vent , & be looked after

< off to rest & do house tasks >

< passes round grown up , classy hamper treats >

< scoffs sickly rum balls >

city did end up at Ikea, BUT thankfully dh hates shopping so he printed out what he needed in advance, took me to the one area directly (by going in at tills and going backwards ) to what I had to choose and then straight to the aisles where wardrobes were. I didn't lift anything and as he has spent all weekends banging and sawing I have rested.

After Friday just didnt' want to be on my own, didn't want to work - still don't, having taken Fri as a sick day - and am being pathetic with hormones right now. Think anxiety is so high after coming off all AD's and meds on top of life events right now, so not the best combination.

choc - yes that was the med I was thinking off. I know it is NOT an anti-psychotic, but used for anxiety etc that is a bit more long term than what diazepam may be used for. Agrees with choc that Ikea is not restful, and nearly everyone I saw had a bump (of female gender that is )

choc - with dd, all I can say is if school teacher wants to talk to you I would:

• ask what the teacher and school is doing about it (after all she is their responsibility when in school not yours)
• ask the teacher what strategies in school the teacher has found effective with dd (ie praise, rewards, short term punishments may work or not, etc ...)
• ask what school policies are for young children struggling to settle in at school
• tell the teacher you support any rewards or sanctions the school wishes to use (eg lost break time for this incident etc)
• ask the teacher if the teacher/school is concerned at all about dd's development educationally and if so what the school is going to do about it (ie any testing to see if she has problems with sight/hearing/behaviour/literacy) that they can then offer specific support for

Choc what I mean is, I would TURN it totally onto the teacher and school whilst showing demure support for school policies! That way it is the teachers responsibility to sort out what happens in their classroom and school (which legally it is!!) and to tell you what the school or her is doing differently to assist your daughter. Rather than allow the teacher to dictate to you and make you responsible for what goes on in school (which you can't be). You may find a different response then !! If you go in pretending to be strong, asking questions all the time of what the school does, say you support all school sanctions etc, that you want to work WITH the teacher and school in this time of transition for your dd etc it may make a HUGE difference to how you feel.

Sorry - waffled for ages. city - wow, what a lot of involvement and interesting activities this weekend.

What busy weekends city & Keziah! Wow a demo on the impacts of gov cuts on women, city < choc adds disabled, poor and single into the mix >. I have to say this govt utterly depresses me . < choc takes deep breath and holds to prevent incessant political ranting on support thread >

Glad you survived Ikea Keziah, sounds like you and dh were on a mission . Yes funny about the bumps (though is it just me then that sees increasing numbers of men with bumps!!). Hope you're able to bring your anxiety back under control. I can't imagine having to stop ads abruptly like you did (I think I was approx 8 months clear of meds before starting ttc so in a very different place even without the additional stresses you face). When is your next acupuncture session? Hopefully that will level things out a bit.

I've had a slow weekend as I managed to catch some kind of flu/cold bug - came out of nowhere. Went to bed Friday fine, woke up Saturday morning with temperature, aches and pains, runny nose, and phlegm to boot. Needless to say I hardly left the bed. Fortunately dd has been an absolute angel throughout considering she's been stuck indoors.

Thanks for the advice Keziah. I'm seriously hoping I won't need it though. Am I being a chicken for secretly hoping I won't get summoned? < choc sticks head in the sand >.

Right, time for more paracetamol .

< warming drink & jolly snowman tissues for choc > < hopes choc has been able to keep head in sand today > You really know your stuff , Keziah , just the strategies I'd want to have on hand if school were putting full responsibility on me ( I know we don't know if they'll try to do that )
Hope your flu will get you off having to have a big chat for a couple of days , & that keeping a close watch on dd's emotions mood , energy & other markers will give you some clues if she is feeling out of sorts , & if school environment is somehow responsible .
Bless dd for being patient & cooperative < 3 gold stars >

So , so sorry for the anxiety at the moment ., but seems a natural reaction to enormous year and the the stresses of this precious pregnancy . Am 100 % in awe of you as I was terrified at prospect of pregnacy without medication for emergencies - was certain I'd feel far more anxious than ever .

Well, I was hoping your & dh's combined mega efficiency would make the trip manageable , but your precision made me laugh . Seems telling that people are only driven to face the place when bearers of bumps < gives choc stern look on right of males to have bumps too >

I was lucky to have such a lot of fun when only going along v grudgingly to make up numbers . Body suffering for not having taken our collective advice to rest , but will do plnty of sleeping

choc , good to share the rage ...the cuts to mobility component of dla to disabled , mainly elderly , in care homes ( making them totally dependent on owners of homes organising outings ) are a pure civil rights issue . Incredible to see LPs having to struggle yet more due to childcare , employment conditions & HB , where applicable , being slashed ... so many people suffering as it is .

Right , am an entire month behind my v least impressive goals , so had better get back on ... am mulling over quite big changes with some parts of my life , and have been experimenting all year , but am trying not to burn too many bridges ( not talking about marriage , thank goodness ) but I guess some of the relationships & memberships have been patched up too many times to be healthy anyway < ponders as she works >

< our hamper comes with waiter / ress service today , for those light but nourishing morsels you pregnant or fluey people need > < Jeeves and Wooster theme tune >

Mulling over quite big changes city? Can we stick oar in help? Right now, I would love for anything tangible to distract my mind from wallowing in self-pity (but would obviously prefer for you to not have to make big decisions ). I feel like disappearing again .

At least school situation was sorted - I only found out over breakfast table this morning that dd was placed in time-out and made to apologise to other child. She could have told me that on Friday, grrrrr!

Anyway, hope you have a restful night (you too Keziah) xx

choc glad school situation sorted. dd probably didn't want to admit to you on Friday what had happened!! Anyway, keep my list if you ever get called in (being on the other side I sort of know how to manage teachers, hehe!!)

city due to physical issues this year my dh has just had to do the major things that need doing, if I couldn't do them. If they weren't urgent they either got done quicker, not at all or still need doing!! .

choc - it must be nov, as distraction and disappearing are thoughts here too, for no reason that I can work out! xx

waves to Keziah and choc
Sorry , keeping monitor button on with other hand so not a proper post ... Pleased teacher dealt with the offence there and then but that you had to go all weekend in dread
at Keziah and the management of teachers - I can imagine you doing that .Am thinking of you both and wish I was inventive with distractions - will try !

Are you still feeling poorly , choc on top of stress
Gives Keziah slightly stern look for not complaining about pg symptoms , though am sure there are serious reasons why you aren't ... hope you know we realise you must be very tired and enduring all sorts . choc will understand , and I'll bring hot drinks and silly Xmas films

Ah yes Keziah , those strategies for dealing with large tasks sound familiar
Wish I could speed up the winter for you two ... less than 4 weeks now till the days start to lengthen

That's incredibly lovely of you to offer advice on my decisions , choc .. sniff sniff... I have asked advice from a couple of people this year and , well , a big fat one of them actually believed my gut feeling Would it be OK to PM you with the problems in the next day or so , then you can forget about it or treat it like a sudoku for times of distraction very , very rude of meto ask

Hamper waiter uses silver tongs serves up nutricious delicacies for you both

Peaceful , comforting evening to us all xxx

nutritious , that is ...and not being fattist about the person who believed me , just can't use the symbols for italics etc

I'm truly on the mend today. The aches have all gone, just got the phlegm but at least it's running clear now < tmi >. And I forced myself to stay awake this morning after the school run even though I just wanted to get right back under my duvet. It feels an achievement in itself .

city thanks for cheery news about how there is < 4 wks until the days start to lengthen. Initially I was actually quite stunned < thinking where has the time gone - this fog is taking a loooong time to clear > but I'm seeing the positive in that with more light coming through I might perk up a bit.

Ahh pregnancy symptoms. For me the worst was first trimester and last few weeks before the birth (the being too big to sleep comfortably!). Keziah I imagine you're being a trouper and grinning and bearing it. Mind you I'd take the physical aspect over the mental torture any day. Fortunately, I escaped the mental ill health from second trimester. < tries to send soothing anti-anxiety vibes to Keziah >.

Yes city more than ok to PM me with the probs. I might even reply . Btw you lost me with the nutricious vs nutritious bit - I thought I understood it perfectly in the first post. xx

Yay, choc is feeling better physically - that always helps. And staying up is a good achievement.... I almost hid in bed today but made myself stay up and that truly is an achievement.

Having moaned for ages about a lack of a bump, I am now getting big (lack of muscles not helping!!) so totally agree the last few weeks may be horribly uncomfortable. But after 7yrs trying to conceive I am trying to not moan. First trimester was great and no mental health issues then at all. Am LIKING thoughts of more daylight - good news city .

At least my desire for sweet foods has come back in time for Christmas

2 not so nice medical appointments tomorrow - can't believe I booked them for the same day, duh!!!