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Original poster

Is 4 kids too many?

251 replies

Mumsie2024 · 14/02/2025 23:52

Hi, would like to know your thoughts?
is 4 kids a step too far? Currently have 3 kids and thinking I’d like a 4th but not sure if it’s hormones!
What's the verdict?

OP posts:
Ph3 · 14/02/2025 23:56

This is highly dependent on your personal circumstances

Whatevershallidowithmylife · 14/02/2025 23:59

3 too many if you care about the environment.

IdaGlossop · 15/02/2025 00:02

So many variables! Income. Size of home. Health. Age of other children. The extent to which the other children are a challenge or not. View of father.

ThreeMagicNumber · 15/02/2025 00:03

Whatevershallidowithmylife · 14/02/2025 23:59

3 too many if you care about the environment.

Well she can't bloody put one back in now can she. What a stupid comment.

Youhaveyourhandsfull · 15/02/2025 00:04

Course not. It's a personal thing, and if it works with your circumstances absolutely go for it. But only you really know that.
I don't remember it being hugely game changing going from 3 to 4. Depends on your age as well.

Mayfly3 · 15/02/2025 00:07

I think it is. For the reasons outlined by others above, but also can you give four children the adequate love and attention they deserve? It's really stretching yourself and spreading yourself thin.

Crispynoodle · 15/02/2025 00:13

I had 4 and loved every minute with them (they're all adults now and giving me GGC which is lovely)

blueshoes · 15/02/2025 00:15

Crispynoodle · 15/02/2025 00:13

I had 4 and loved every minute with them (they're all adults now and giving me GGC which is lovely)

Sounds like it is for your benefit.

Developedanillness · 15/02/2025 00:18

Too many, cost, time, environment etc

Miley1967 · 15/02/2025 00:23

I have four ( all grown ups now) but yes I think in hindsight it was too much in many respects - financially particularly and took it's toll on health etc when they were all young. If I had my time again I would probably stop at 2 or 3 max. That's not to say of course that i don't love them dearly !

MrsSkylerWhite · 15/02/2025 00:24

Of course it is.

Pussygaloregalapagos · 15/02/2025 00:25

4 is not that many. Well unless you are middle class. Only the lower classes and the upper classes have more than 3…. So ask yourself…. Where on the class scale do you fit….

CarrieCardigan · 15/02/2025 00:29

Whatevershallidowithmylife · 14/02/2025 23:59

3 too many if you care about the environment.

Well so is 2 if you’re taking that approach. There’s no environmental credence to saying 2 is ok but 3 is too many. It’s simply a case of society deciding that people should be reasonably allowed 2.

thehourwaslate · 15/02/2025 00:46

CarrieCardigan · 15/02/2025 00:29

Well so is 2 if you’re taking that approach. There’s no environmental credence to saying 2 is ok but 3 is too many. It’s simply a case of society deciding that people should be reasonably allowed 2.

Show quote history

I think that’s what they mean - having 4 children is 3 too many, i.e. 1 is enough! (Not that I agree with that personally!)

Original poster
Mumsie2024 · 15/02/2025 00:55

@Whatevershallidowithmylife Indeed, what a stupid comment. I have 3 and I actually believe we are becoming under populated.

OP posts:
Original poster
Mumsie2024 · 15/02/2025 00:57

@Ph3 I am asking for peoples lived experiences who already have 4z

OP posts:
stanleypops66 · 15/02/2025 01:02

What would a fourth give that the other 3 can't ?

dibdabdog · 15/02/2025 01:19

Mayfly3 · 15/02/2025 00:07

I think it is. For the reasons outlined by others above, but also can you give four children the adequate love and attention they deserve? It's really stretching yourself and spreading yourself thin.

It really isn't!

Fifiworks · 15/02/2025 01:25

I’d have 6 kids if I could afford to not work and have a full time home help and cleaner and still go on holidays. It’s the housework that got to me! I have 3 kids. So much laundry. So much stuff to tidy. But the kids themselves are great and I love having them so much.

So it really depends on your perspective and your financial situation.

Ph3 · 15/02/2025 01:50

I don’t have 4, I have 3 and I think that’s already pretty crazy. Financially you have to juggle as I’m sure you know - add another one to the mix even more. And kids get more expensive as they grow not less - schools, books, clothes, uni, allowance… the cost grows exponentially. It’s also much harder getting one on one with your kids. We really value that in my household so no I wouldn’t have any more. What do you think a 4th child can bring you that you didn’t get from your first 3?

IVFeltbetter · 15/02/2025 01:53

I have 5 and it’s right for us.

Developedanillness · 15/02/2025 09:28

Mumsie2024 · 15/02/2025 00:55

@Whatevershallidowithmylife Indeed, what a stupid comment. I have 3 and I actually believe we are becoming under populated.

Edited

UK may not be replacing like for like but jeez the planet certainly isn't! It's pretty much the worst thing you can do for the environment. 8 billion and growing, hardly underpopulated

Decafflatteplease · 15/02/2025 09:30

We have 4 so obviously no I don't think it's too many. It's busy certainly but I'm never bored 😂

NinnyNa · 15/02/2025 09:31

Don't do it.

When they're small it's nice but as they grow older and they're teens and having big things going on in their lives I feel like I never have enough time to support them all.

InMyMNEra · 15/02/2025 09:33

It would be too many for me, but only you can decide that for yourself.

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