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Conception

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Fuck you TTC

483 replies

painintheholeSIL · 31/01/2020 07:45

Today should be day one of my period. No sign. We've been ttc dc2 since summer 2018. I don't have any tests in the house. I'm trying not to symptom spot, I haven't told anyone in real life that we're trying.
Our son is almost 4. I'm desperate to give him a sibling. I adore him. He's amazing.

But I am aching to have another baby. People keep asking when we're going to and we just laugh off the questions. They hurt. Every one of them hurts. I suppose I'm just looking for people who understand.

Every single thread I look at in relation to this ends up full of BFPs and I'm just not in the space where I can read those and not feel devastated.

So Fuck you to TTC.
Fuck you to months off slightly delayed periods
Fuck you to every fucker that asks me every time they see me if I have any news
Fuck you to the whole fucking lot of it.

Anyone care to add theirs?

OP posts:
skh197 · 03/02/2020 20:56

Ohh can I please join you all? Reading all your posts has made me feel a little less alone this evening. So...
Fuck you TTC for first time aged 40.
Fuck you to all the hours wasted trawling the internet checking ‘symptoms’.
Fuck you to all the hours spent daydreaming about how I’ll tell my family and friends I’m pregnant and never getting to do it.
Fuck you to not realising how emotionally and physically draining TTC would be.
And worst things to say...
Fuck you to the scan photo the whole family was surprised with by my cousin on Christmas Day when i had dreamed about doing just that myself.
Fuck you to the daily texts from my best friend about how much she is struggling with teething / sleepless nights / another cold when I’d give my right arm to be having sleepless nights with a baby of my own.

Of course I don’t in any way mean fuck you to my wonderful cousin or beautiful best friend, I love them both dearly. So fuck you TTC for making me even think these things about the people I love.

painintheholeSIL · 03/02/2020 21:05

@skh197 I'm sorry you're on this journey with the rest of us. We all know exactly what you mean so let all your fucks out here!

OP posts:
PurpleDaisies · 03/02/2020 21:15

So fuck you TTC for making me even think these things about the people I love.

This is one of the worst things. I absolutely hate myself for feeling like that too.

CorneliusBeefington · 03/02/2020 21:23

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

ChelleF123 · 03/02/2020 21:29

@skh197 Oh I know the feeling. I try my hardest to be a jealous bitch. Yet here I am over here green with envy over my 19 year old cousin “accidentally” falling pregnant.
I’m 37 and all my friends have their babies. It hurts xxx

Jeds55 · 03/02/2020 21:50

Fuck my mum telling me it's a good job my last pregnancy didn't work out as my house not big enough (I was complaining about my partner not wanting to move).
Fuck people telling me I should be happy with the child I have (I am, I can still want another).
Fuck people telling me that my miscarriages mean it's not meant to be.
Fuck people telling me to just get a dog.

Jeds55 · 03/02/2020 21:52

That was cathartic
Fuck you to having to beg my partner to try one more time

skh197 · 03/02/2020 23:33

Thanks everyone, it’s so good to have a place to vent, a place we can say the things we can’t say to anyone in our day to day life.x

painintheholeSIL · 04/02/2020 08:02

@Jeds55 awful thing for your mum to sayThanks
Fuck the people saying you should be happy with the one you've got.
Fuck the whole lot of it.

OP posts:
painintheholeSIL · 04/02/2020 08:07

Fuck that my parents are visiting today and my father will spend the whole time making snide little comments about only children and selfish parents and telling me how many kids everyone else has now

Fuck him
Fuck him
And fuck him again

@skh197 it helps doesn't it

OP posts:
TigerJoy · 04/02/2020 08:12

I'd also.like to say fuck off to the endometriosis and adenomyosis which means that I'm in pain at least 21 days of a 26 day cycle. And the fact I'm ttc means I can't take drugs like gabapentin and I have bloody MORPHINE for when it gets bad. Although god bless the NHS and my GP for giving it to me.

And fuck off to the gynaecologist I saw in December who said the only treatment was a hysterectomy and when I said I had been trying (unsuccessful) to conceive for over a year then told me THREE TIMES to get pregnant as that would help the symptoms even though it made me cry every time.

Jeds55 · 04/02/2020 09:57

We've all come across some right dicks.
Special shout out and extra loud fuck you to family members and medical professional dicks. These are the people that are supposed to get it.
I've just been told by a builder that my next door neighbour has a very newborn baby, didn't even know she was pregnant. Now will probably hear it all the time

LM250 · 04/02/2020 12:04

So relieved to see this page !

Both my best friends are pregnant and I've been trying TTC for over a year and feel like a total cow for being the green eyed monster . One falls pregnant after a month and the other after 6 months .

So fuck you to all the arseholes that come out with I fell pregnant really fast .... Well good for you !!

kwazycupcakes · 04/02/2020 13:33

I really needed to see this thread today.

Fuck you to TTC for 12 months with no sniff of a BFP.
Fuck you to going to my first GP appointment and saying it out loud makes it feel so real 😔
Fuck you to the people on facebook announcing their unplanned pregnancies.
Fuck you to my work colleague showing me photos of his baby every fucking day.
Fuck you to TTC occupying every thought all day everyday.

Sending Flowers to everyone here.

ChelleF123 · 04/02/2020 14:19

I had no idea how TTC would the over my life. Not my OH’s. No. Just mine. Every thought. Every plan. Every daydream. Every fucking minute.

painintheholeSIL · 04/02/2020 20:54

@kwazycupcakes it's hard saying it to the doctor isn't it? Makes it a real thing. A really real thing. I feel your pain.

@ChelleF123 it takes over everything for women. Men are so different.

OP posts:
Nat4392 · 05/02/2020 00:18

Fuck that feeling when you’re lying in bed, thinking AF has arrived but are too scared to get up and check and admit defeat for yet another month.

Nat4392 · 05/02/2020 06:10

Furthermore, fuck my anxiety-filled brain for worrying all night and getting no sleep for no reason when I’m fact, AF didn’t even arrive!

Jeds55 · 05/02/2020 09:34

Fuck you to people who complain about early pregnancy sickness/tiredness when they know how desperately you want to conceive

Jeds55 · 05/02/2020 09:36

Fuck you to people who confidently announce their pregnancy at 5 weeks, so jealous of the optimism that comes with a bfp pre miscarriages

PurpleDaisies · 05/02/2020 09:47

Fuck you to people who confidently announce they’ve decided to have another baby, yet to be conceived. It’s so unfair that it’s so easy.

AggieD86 · 06/02/2020 11:01

hahaha and the thread died ;)

Fuck this ;) hahah

AggieD86 · 06/02/2020 11:07

ooops sorry, the page did not refresh right for me
Fuck this too, I have been refreshing for a couple of days now ;) damn it hahah

AggieD86 · 06/02/2020 11:11

Yeah, I would like to say FUCK YOU to all the doctors I have seen.
I am at the doctors office every 2-3 months and they keep telling me everything is fine and I should be trying (1 year into TTC, I'm 34)
when my TSH is over 2,500 and my prolactin is 2x the norm...
and I miscarried and had a biochemical and no one is paying attention to that...
How many times do I have to miscarry for them to look into it, Fuck this

CorneliusBeefington · 06/02/2020 11:43

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.