Just MC and ready to try again? Pregnant after MC and seeking somewhere safe to hide? Jump in the mosh pit for some serious metalling or settle yourself down in our padded cell. All welcome! (Part 19)

[Poppyjen]

Another new thread for some more serious metalling - we really are a chatty lot!

Here's to making it through the WTF cycle(s), metalling* like a teenager from the early '90s in the 2WW, BFP colds and other classic symptom spotting and hiding in the (nice and comfy) padded cell post BFP

If you have miscarried and are ready to TTC again, come and join us!

• For those currently wondering what our mosh pit antics have to do with ttc post MC, a fabulous typo in an earlier thread resulted in "mentalling" becoming known as "Metalling" - a far more fitting expression I am sure you will agree!

Welcome!

I'm on cycle day 28 of what is usually a 26 day cycle iq. It's not totally unknown for it to extend to 27 days, but only about once a year. I did get DH to ahem participate twice on the day of the positive opk, so am hopeful, but that is tempered by the lack of symptoms (aka sore boobs).

And pie I agree with IQ - your colleague needs to learn to mind their own!

Aww ladies thank you for all your lovely birthday wishes and-cake-and-scones-and-millionaires-shortbread i feel rather bloated now DH made me a lovely meal last night (well he burned the salmon but he is usually such a good cook i let him off!) and we had a bottle of Wolf Blass, which went straight to my head and i felt rather woozy and fell asleep

Still no AF i am pondering though, my cycles are usually short which would make me overdue now, however i had the CP exactly four weeks ago today (the monday thing remember). My AF usually comes 2 weeks and 1 day after OV, but i am not sure when i OV'd, it might have been the Sunday (which would make today AF day) or it could have been the following Wednesday (which would make this Thursday AF day) gaaaahhhh

But then if the ICs can give a reading (albeit very faint) up to 5 days before AF due then i am definitely testing tomorrow am. tiago are we doing FMU? I should be on around 9am when-i get into work to update you. Good luck tiago

OK metalling over for-now

bonzo you made my day with the wee jug story! DS will be none the wiser Hope you are feeling better newton

back later (probably blubbing as AF turns up)

tiago i am exactly the same - usually a 26 day cycle with 27 days at a push, i am on CD29

pie i would say to your colleague 'no i am not pregnant - just fat' that will shut them up!!

Wonder how jaffa is today - thinking of you

I will be doing FMU tomorrow - assuming nothing happens. Hoping to see you then!

positive thinking will get us through today tiago quite literally!!

Hello, hoping for good news for Tiago and Martha.

MsCoffee, I am so pleased that you got some answers, and that you are going to get extra monitoring.

Well, the news is this house is pretty grim to be honest. I got another set of blood results back, which put together with the other results and the scan, has meant that 3 different people in the EPU have said that this is not a viable pregnancy. So I will be having medical management next week, unless I miscarry on my own in the meantime. They only do the medical management on certain days, so I was given the fabulous choice of either going in to take the first lot of drugs on Sunday 5th , and then having the miscarriage on Tuesday, (my DD 2nd birthday), going in on Tuesday and then coming back on Thurs, or waiting for another week, and doing it on 12 and 14th. I have chosen the middle option, because I cannot take the mental strain of waiting for weeks and weeks, and hopefully, I won't be in there too long on Tuesday.

I am actually so angry with it all. I am angry and sad and confused. I wake up every day, not knowing whether this will be the day it all starts. Every time I have a cramp or twinge, I think, 'Is this it?' I convinced myself that I was miscarrying on Saturday, as I was standing in the queue at the supermarket. My family don't live near by, so if it gets nasty, I am going to struggle with my DD. I am just trying to hold it together, because I cannot let myself get back into the same mental hole that I was in over the summer. It is different this time, it is sooner, and I had more warning with the conception indicators, but it is still my baby, not growing, not doing anything. I just wish so much that everything was different.

I am also having a lot of sadness about my miscarriage in the summer. I took my daughter to a dancing class today, and there was a huge pregnant woman there. It suddenly struck me so hard that her baby was due after mine, that I would have had my baby by now if it had gone differently. And there is no explanation for either what happened then, or what has happened now.

I am not sure when I will be posting again, probably after I have miscarried. I think I will be lurking for a while. Lots of love to you all.

I'm so sorry jaffa that sounds horrendous. I know what you mean about seeing people and thinking how you should have your baby by then. I hope the medical management goes ok - we'll be thinking of you.

Oh jaffa, I'm so sorry. Look after yourself.

thinking of your jaffa, and totally understanding how you feel about cramps, waiting around, the pregnant lady.

jaffa im so sorry you are having to go through this awful time i dont have much experience with MMC as my Mcs have always happened before i knew there was anything wrong IYSWIM the most warning i get is like a sense of impending doom i hope if things dont happen before, that the medical management goes as well as it can go

hope everyone else is ok

im in work...border as per usual

Oh jaffa hugs. Just (((hugs))) and love. thinking of you xx

oh god jaffa your post has moved me to tears i am so so very sorry for what you are going through.

i bet your emotions are all over the place, you will have sadness, anger, jealousy and bitter bitter regret. i dont want to state the obvious but i understand that you will be mixed up that you 'are' still pregnant but are not IYSWIM. The waiting must be so hard for you. I hope you are off work (apologies as i cant remember your situation) but if you are not off work then get yourself a sicknote and go home.

my thoughts are with you, i am so sorry. xxxxx

jaffa thinking of you lots...I remember the limbo feeling well and the waiting...oh, the waiting was just hideous, from when I had my MMC last year. We'd got to our 12week scan before we found out and were told to wait another week for a scan and then had the option of just waiting to see if my body would let the MC happen naturally, medical management or an ERPC. I opted for the ERPC as just wanted to know when it would all be sorted and couldn't face the medical management - is there an option for you to have an ERPC (if that's something you might consider)? It might be less intrusive/disturbing to life than having to deal with the med management whilst at home with your DD - just a thought. Thinking of you lots and so so sorry you have to go through all of this!!

IQ yeah for 6 days left (well, pretty much 5 by now!!) I just counted up and it's about 60 for me!

marthas and tiago keep us posted tomorrow...thinking thoughts for you!

Jaffa. sorry you're going through such a crap tome, I really feel for you.

I've been doing serious bit of 'metalling' myself today, getting stomach cramps and a little bit of back pain, not constant and no blood, but so worried it's happening for the 3rd time on the trot.

i'm trying to stay positive, not much has happened really but I'm so paranoid. Another thing that is bugging me that if the worst did happen, i don't know if it would count as a 3rd miscarriage as I'm only 4+4 today. if it's not going to happen I at least want it to count so that I can have some tests!

Anyone else have cramping and then continue with a normal pregnancy? i know cramps can be quite common but given the history I'm thinking the worst.

mad I would say that so long as you have got a BFP,it definitely "counts" if something went wrong. Hope that it doesn't, I think cramps can be normal as you stretch and the little bean gets all snug. Just try to rest and have your DP fetch everything for you!

Good luck for tomorrow marthas and tiago aren't you good for waiting until Tuesday?!

I've been swimming tonight so starving,waiting for DP to return with the take away it used to be our Monday night treat after weight watchers...now it's just another excuse to fill my face!!

hmm, well i gave in and POAS (well PO2S is more accurate!)

they were both IC's and got a BFN on both of them, DH reckoned he could see a faint line but i fished them out the bin 10 mins later and the faint pink stuff had gone. i just wish i had done a CB digi (in PJs and cant be arsed to go to sainsbos).

I will do another one with FMU in the morning, but i know that AF is late and i am usually bang on time although i did have a CP last month.

gaaah FFS

thinking of jaffa

marthas good luck with POAS tomorrow morning ignore the BFNs it's too early to get a BFP with an IC at night

I'm still waiting for my tests to turn up over a week now! Ahhh well it's not like il get BFP anyway despite still having HUGE boobs and painful tingly sensations etc it's my body being an arsehole as usual

mad I had cramping with DS. At the time I'd assumed it was AF on her way, then nothing happened and I forgot about it for a few weeks (assumed it was a WTF cycle coming off the pill).

thanks newton and bonzo, it's stopped now, hoping it was very low down wind

Oh Jaffa I can't even put into words how sorry I am that this has happened.....I totally understand that you are feeling very mixed up and unsure. It is a bitter blow to take when you have started to have a little bit of hope. Thinking of you at this time and hoping that you are being well looked after at home!!! Xxxx

martha staying positive for tomorrows testing despite bfn this evening.....we shall be awaiting your update in the morning.

This evening has been a bit mental......was having contractions this afternoon and so dutifully called the MW who said come into hospital to be checked. So I drove home, speedily packed a bag for myself and the baby (being only 33 weeks i thought i had lots of time), thanked god that the car seat had arrived today and then tried to remain calm on the journey to the hospital. So we arrive and I get hooked up to a monitor - were told that baby looks good but that i am contracting so I need to be monitored further. About an hour later a dr comes to check and then wants to do a swab test and internal exam......both of which were horrendous!!!! But luckily no protein in the swab and no dilation so we were sent home and I've been told to rest as they don't want me pushing it too much.

Now all you ladies who have had a baby I need to ask a question - is an internal supposed to be a screaming pain or am I simply a wimp who is going to need all the pain relief available when I go into labour?? I said to DH I felt really embarrassed about screaming but I couldn't help it and now I'm worried that I wont cope when the time comes because i screamed about an internal.......anyone had experience they can share as I'm now a bit panicked!!!

Every internal I've ever had has been horrendous. But have found that smears and TV ultrasounds were fine. In retrospect some of my internals might have involved sweeps that I had not consented to (another thread entirely, don't get me started). I can't imagine yours would have involved a sweep. Ask for gas and air next time if you are on the labour ward. I did. You will cope when the time comes, either because the pain will be different, or because you will have strategies from antenatal classes, or because you have good pain relief, or because you have no choice....or you like me have a wonderful, pain free CS.

FWIW at one point my consultant was considering inducing DS at 32 weeks. Her words at the time were " don't worry, they do really well then".

IQ any internal I have had during pregnancy has been very painful but not so much outside of preg there's a higher blood flow and sensitivity to that area during pregnancy so it will hurt but don't worry as labour is a different type of pain and has an aim to it so I found that easier to cope with (plus a buildup To it not just BAM! and pain IYSWIM)
I hope you are following Drs orders and resting up

Right, well I tested and it's a big fat negative for me :(

I was getting really hopeful too. No idea why AF is on vacation but given its a no, I wish she'd hurry up as she's messing with my holiday plans ( aka carefully timed holiday requests).

Thank you marbles and bonzo it has made me feel a lot better!!!

tiago sorry it's bfn for you.......when you said you had a bad cold I was really hopeful for you this month!!! Not really sure what AF is up to is though. Xxx

Well AF showed up this morning i was all ready with the pee cup and the sticks, but sadly had no need for them.

DH as always is gutted, we were just like tiago and convinced and hopeful that this was our month sorry for you too tiago FX that dratted AF turns up soon to get you back onto next cycle

IQ honest to god i screamed when i had my internal when i was starting labour (i had a CS in the end) I called the obstetrician a bitch (tho i was on drugs at the time!!) i ended up proposing to the male obstetrician who was a delightful calming Nigerian consultant - i have been told i can have him again when i have another bambino!

Lets just say that whilst in labour 'anything goes'