Are parents missing out? MN without children

[Sequinppigeon]

Inspired by another thread, but really not meant with malice... Do you think parents are missing out by having children?

Do they remove themselves from
opportunities or experiences for example?

Although they experienced child free life before having them, one you have them you don't get childfree life again. Especially not initially, and you're always a parent.

Can they really know what it would be like to have children and therefore what they are committing themselves to?

Just wondering how child free people feel as a counter to this well worn idea that we are some how missing out or lacking.

I’ve coped and pasted it directly from the opening post.

It can’t be taken in different ways.

I didn’t ask you to apologise.

I’m not triggered.

Are parents missing out? MN without children - Title of thread in large bold

At the end of the opening post

Just wondering how child free people feel as a counter to this well worn idea that we are some how missing out or lacking

So it was worded like that.

Inspired by another thread, but really not meant with malice... Do you think parents are missing out by having children?

Do they remove themselves from
opportunities or experiences for example?

Although they experienced child free life before having them, one you have them you don't get childfree life again. Especially not initially, and you're always a parent.

Can they really know what it would be like to have children and therefore what they are committing themselves to?

Just wondering how child free people feel as a counter to this well worn idea that we are some how missing out or lacking.

See above original post....

I responded to the first paragraph and the second. So for the love God.....go away!

WE don’t need to chill out..our posts are not the ones that are being deleted.

As an exhausted parent who for a very long time was childless (and had a gloriously unconstrained life!) and then changed her mind and squeaked them in just in time...yes, god yes, parents are missing out!

But that's life, right? All those paths not taken, and we don't know until the end whether we chose the right one or not.

Inspired by another thread, but really not meant with malice... Do you think parents are missing out by having children?

Do they remove themselves from
opportunities or experiences for example?

Although they experienced child free life before having them, one you have them you don't get childfree life again. Especially not initially, and you're always a parent.

Can they really know what it would be like to have children and therefore what they are committing themselves to?

Just wondering how child free people feel as a counter to this well worn idea that we are some how missing out or lacking.

I responded to the 1st and 3rd paragraph, so yes, my comment was relevant.

Yes you are CLEARLY triggered, but that's not my problem.

And we don't need to go away, either, as this is literally OUR BOARD.

I’m not triggered, you were struggling with comprehension and I pointed out to you what the op was asking as you missed the question, which I copy and pasted for you.

I think that poster is confusing 'triggered' with 'irritated at some people's inability to read.'

I think life opportunities are driven more by money, privilege, background etc than whether you have kids or not.

You can comment again if you like but I won't be

**

@HalloumiGeller let me get this straight, you, a parent, are posting on the board for posters without children, and you are telling a poster without children to go away?

I didn't.

It was a discussion about terminology, and how people's own interpretation of that terminology is what is leading them to believe they do/do not fall into the child free category.

Which in turn results in those people posting when they feel the term personally applies to them.

I guess if you are the kind of person who likes to be mean to people you consider "other" (childfree, disabled, older, poc etc etc) and being mean to those people is no longer as tolerated in day to day life then it must be a relief to have such an easy anonymous outlet for it?

What’s the point of having a discussion about what childfree means on the MNers without children board? Have it elsewhere if you like, but here it has only one meaning.

I agree with you, @KimberleyClark - this totally unnecessary semantic gymnastics tournament seems to simply be a series of parents trying to find a way to justify inserting themselves into a discussion among people without children. I wonder why they all feel that to be so necessary. It’s perfectly fine for some things not to be for them. Just as I don’t post where I’m not the intended group.

And do you also view yourself as an MNer without children?

Even if you’re arguing about the letter, surely you must understand the spirit. This is a board for MNers who are not parents.

Because some people, particularly those who had children later in life, consider that they know both a long time of child free lifestyle, and then became a parent.

Some people don't agree with those views. Neither opinion is superior over the other. It's a disagreement of view points.

Neither can dictate to the other that they are wrong and tell other to get of "their" board.

Why, when it's been repeated over and over, that no one cares, essentially "you do you, I'll do me, as long as we're both happy in our choices" do you keep insisting people are "mean" to you? They are utterly indifferent. Why do you find that mean?

This is a board for MNers without children. Just what is compelling you, a parent,to come on here to argue the toss about what childfree actually means? It’s really strange that you would want to do that? Why can’t you accept that here on this board it means you are not a parent, at all?

Personally I find people going out of the way to tell childfree people that their interests are meaningless unfulfilling and useless mean, but hey you choose your own terminology.

You aren't indifferent though. Not with the volume of posts on this thread you have added

Where did someone tell you that your interests are meaningless?

Please don't excuse repeatedly asking someone why they keep pretending they are being told they are "wrong" when the contrary is being written, and their refusal to answer that (despite many more posts announcing how "wrong" they are) as not being indifferent. I'd like to know the logic process behind that.

As per my previous post?

You don't believe someone who doesn't have a child, hadn't planned to have a child, but ended up with a child, can possibly understand what a child free life is.

Many feel differently. And would say they were child free despite being parents now. Hence they post about their child free experience.

They then get shouted down as to how they can't possibly have a clue. That seems to be fine. It's not. Just because it's not that to you, doesn't mean you can police other's lived experience and decide if they are qualified in your eyes to have an opinion.

This is why there are always the same arguments on these posts. MN has stated all are welcome. And a lot of posters consider themselves to have been child free (even if not now) and can add an informed opinion on the topic/thread. You don't agree with that, and that's fine. They aren't shouting at you to get off their space, yet you are doing this to them.

They aren't shouting at you to get off their space, yet you are doing this to them.

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

But it's MUMsnet