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Bereavement

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Original poster

MrW has died

211 replies

Willowkins · 02/06/2019 23:44

My previous threads were: www.mumsnet.com/Talk/life_limiting.../2887509-Im-not-OK and www.mumsnet.com/.../3266385-The-calm-before-the-storm for any one who wants to follow my story (sorry I can't do clicky links)

There are 3 things I need to mention now that my sweet, funny MrW has died: (1) I am so sad and I miss him terribly; (2) most people have been really kind but some have been downright patronising; and (3) the sheer amount of paperwork is doing my head in.

OP posts:
MrsAitch13 · 16/06/2019 13:48

I hope it goes well tomorrow. My thoughts are with you. I second the tip about waterproof mascara and don't be afraid of taking some time out to gather your thoughts x

MrsGannicus · 16/06/2019 15:00

So sorry for your loss. I hope you have some people that can help with practical things as well as being there for you. Flowers

HoofWankingSpangleCunt · 16/06/2019 17:50

I'm so sorry for your loss, willowkins. Mr W sounds like the very best of men.
I remember all too clearly those nightmarish first few weeks when the dust settles on your new life and the pain is just so intense.
I'm nearly three years on now and we have all adjusted in our own ways. I might be a little lot fatter and my hair is much greyer but that pain that thwocks you under the ribs is a far less frequent visitor.
I'm sending all my love and strength to you and the YWs for tomorrow and the days after. Xxx

MadisonAvenue · 16/06/2019 23:57

I'm so sorry for your loss, he sounds like a top fella. I'll be thinking of you tomorrow Flowers

echt · 17/06/2019 00:29

I'll be thinking of you tomorrow, Willowkins

babbi · 17/06/2019 06:42

Morning Willowkins .
Just wanted to send you a little message of support.
I pray you find strength to get through today .
I am so sorry for your loss .

Take care of yourself xxxx

QOD · 17/06/2019 07:00

Hugs today 💐

Chasingsquirrels · 17/06/2019 08:06

Thinking of you Willowkins

meercat23 · 17/06/2019 08:12

Thinking of you and your DC today Willowkins Thanks

iamspartacusthesecond · 17/06/2019 08:18

Also thinking of you Willowkins. I know this sounds strange but at my DSIL funeral everyone took photographs at the Wake and they are really lovely to look back on now, seeing family and friends smiling or roaring with laughter sharing stories of her. Sending love and light xx

notapizzaeater · 17/06/2019 08:53

Thinking of you today xx

echt · 18/06/2019 14:08

How did it go, Willowkins? I've been thinking of you.

Original poster
Willowkins · 18/06/2019 15:30

It was a beautiful day. The sun was shining. The service was pretty much perfect. Friends stepped up to help with the food, music, readings and tributes. The flowers were lovely.

When we got to the bit where we had to say our final goodbye, I whispered 'don't go' but he had already gone. It breaks my heart.

Farewell my lovely.

OP posts:
VictoriaBun · 18/06/2019 18:38

FlowersFlowers

carlywurly · 18/06/2019 18:49

I'm so sorry. You write beautifully and I have a real picture in my mind.

He sounds wonderful Thanks

notapizzaeater · 18/06/2019 19:56

That sounds like a lovely day. He's not gone, he's just in a different room x

echt · 19/06/2019 12:44

Sounds lovely, Willowkins. Funerals are for the left, not gone, and the way you feel uplifted and supported by the way you, your family and friends sent off your good man your memories will sustain you.

Many many Thanks

Frikonastick · 21/06/2019 06:57

Thinking of you willow

LoubyLou1234 · 21/06/2019 07:03

The way you speak of your DH And your relationship is beautiful. We've only been together 8 years but I hope that we still like and love each other that much throughout our relationship. Sorry for your loss.

Original poster
Willowkins · 21/06/2019 12:51

Okay just wanted to say I have bought a new mop and the bathroom floor now looks really good. Hope you don't mind me sharing mundane stuff but it's funny how routine can be good.

I cleared a window ledge yesterday and have donated a funny looking vase to the church Summer Fayre tomorrow. Hopefully someone will love it.

I'll be there on a stall helping the elderly lady who decorated the church on Monday with MrW's favourite flowers (no one asked her to do this she just did - I am truly blessed with good friends).

I just hope no-one tells me how brave I'm being. Mr W would have been there so that's all the push I need.

Thanks for listening and all your kind wishes.

OP posts:
babbi · 21/06/2019 15:08

More than delighted to hear your updates of any sort Willowkins ..

Take care xx

Chasingsquirrels · 21/06/2019 15:40

Hope the fete goes well Willowkins.

The number of times I've wanted to shout at people "I'm not being brave or strong, I'm just having to carry on" or "of course you could cope if it happened to you, because what's your alternative?". Of course I haven't done that, I've just smiled and nodded.

Original poster
Willowkins · 21/06/2019 19:53

That's very sweet of you babbi

Exactly squirrel I'll try that tomorrow. And the second question is: How are the children?

OP posts:
Original poster
Willowkins · 22/06/2019 09:12

Just realised the church fayre is in the same church as the funeral and it'll be my first time back there. I'll do it anyway because I said I would but what was I thinking? Maybe I am brave.

OP posts:
babbi · 22/06/2019 09:17

You are very brave and an inspiration.
Mr W would be so proud of you ...
go and do your very best to join in and talk to people ..
if you have a few wobbles so what ?
You are human with a big heart and soul ... people will respect you so much today x

Good luck and if you feel up to it later let’s us know how it goes xx

Eat well and be kind to yourself x