To make DH choose between us and old family?

[WashwithCare]

DH previously had a 10 yr living together relationship with a woman who already had 2 kids from 2 different dads. Children were 1 and 3 when she moved in with DH. They do not see their own fathers and call DH dad.

DH left his ex when we met (bit of a whirl wind romance) and 6 mths later, we married. I'm expected our first baby this month.

DH tried to be reasonable, and let his ex-gf stay in his house. He is a super high earner, and also paid child support at well above CSA rates, and more besides. HIs ex is always demanding more money, despite the fact that he is not he kid's father, and they weren't married.

Last 2 years have been a nightmare re his old family. His ex turns up screaming on teh door step, kids scream abuse at me - and oldest has now started stealing stuff from our house. Contact is patchy, and mum either changes arrangemetn at last minute, so expensive hols, show tickets etc are lost or literally dumps the kids on our doorstep.

She hasn't worked in years, and has made no attempt to train or find work.

I have had enough. I am seriously considering telling DH (and I do love him so much) that it't either them or me.. Unless he evicts them from his house, has no further contact and stops any more payments, I will walk!

Am I being unreasonable?

Eh? Why has this thread gone live again after 22 months?

Is this thread called Lazarus?

Zombie thread.

Good old WWC

Yanbu to feel this way, their mum sounds like a total drop kick who is taking advantage of your generous dh. It is not acceptable that her and the kids steak from you and are shouting abuse. You are expecting so all this puts stress on you and your baby. I am shocked at the hostility you have on here. Yes your dh should do something, the kids mum is not helping the situation

I don't think the OP was being unreasonable. I think her issues were very reasonable, but her original suggestions for dealing with them were a bit extreme.

having gone to the trouble of reading (nearly) the whole thing, I would be very pleased if the OP came back with an update. It would be nice to see a happy ending where the ex had moved on (and maybe got a job to support herself, even if OP's DH still supported the DCs), the DCs were all nice and happy, and OP and Dh were happy together.

Like one of those Jeremy Kyles where he goes back to their houses a year or two later to see if they have done as they were told!

Spooky! WashwithCare makes a lazarus like reappearance just before Halloween!!!!

Oh the OP did many updates...

at Hallowe'en

fourkids - you expecty the OP to come back after nearly 2 years to give an update?

Can someone tell me why people resurrect old threads as its happening a lot. A few days ago there were loads old threads about boys in female changing rooms.

WinterIsComing, do I need to go and read every post she ever wrote? Would it be worth it? Were they interesting/enlightening/educational??

The OP was a troll who was banned. I doubt she will nip back as WWC to update us on her made up story.

duckdodgers,

Not really. I didn't say I expected her to. I said I'd be very pleased if she did.

I'd also be really pleased if I won a couple of mill on the lottery...sadly I don't expect that will happen either. (much more sadly)

I am intrigued about how the thread got resurrected though!

Oh bugger I've just wasted fecking hours five minutes wading through this thread so I can join in

Oh, shame. good imagination.

fourkids me to! I only look at threads on the first page, I know others may do searches but what would you be searching for in the title of this one!

goodness only knows!!

Maybe........she's back

of course he cannot walk away from those 2 children!!!!!
They call him DAD, they see him as their dad, would you feel differently if your DH and his ex would have been married?

You seem to imply that because the children are not biologically his and because they were never a married couple you DH is entitled to simply disappear. THink about the children please.

AgnesP resurrected this thread on previous page. Has also resurrected a four year old, but non-controversial book thread.

If I was a troll and I got banned, I'd come back a year or two later as someone else and resurrect my old threads to save me making up new ones...

sassysusan?

timetoask, i think you had better read this last page.

It crossed my mind that trolls may resurrect their old threads to.

Eh I dont understand how people can tell she is a troll? It all sounds rather far fetched.
Agnes P why did you pull this up again?

I dunno. it all sounds possible...the only thing I think is a bit too odd is describing your DH as a 'super high earner'...I would never tell you lot that my DH is actually an earl with a trust fund that pays him hundreds of thousands every year, which more than helps maintain the royal pile we call our modest home, let alone the rest of the super high expenditure :)