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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To not want an August baby?

360 replies

DodgyApostrophe · 19/11/2008 20:49

I'm not ttc this month.

I don't want a baby in August as I feel they are definitely at a disadvantage throughout school.

I do want a baby, desperately. Have been ttc for 2 years and have had 2 mc since ds1.

Is it really that bad to be born in August?

OP posts:
TeenyTinyTorya · 19/11/2008 20:52

It wouldn't bother me, tbh. You could always hold them back a year if you felt he/she needed it.

cyanarasamba · 19/11/2008 20:52

Same here. DS will be 2 in Feb, the time feels right to try again. But not this month.

Bit worried that our ususally very busy maternity unit will be even more busy come September!

nowwearefour · 19/11/2008 20:53

no it is not that bad to be born in august. it must be something you feel v strongly about though to be that keen for a baby and to stop trying this month. i am trying not to be offended as my dd1 is 28 july baby. i do know what you mean though as i think i might feel that strongly about having a christmas baby but i do know people who tried for ages then ended up witha beautiful ds on christmas day who they are SO pleased with. it is your choice. i personally think it is sad as you may have conceived this month. but i do understand why you might feel that way. all the best for a september baby dodgy

mumhadenough · 19/11/2008 20:53

Your baby could be due in September or October but still be born in August!

thisisyesterday · 19/11/2008 20:53

no, I was born on august 28th and it didn't hold me back at all.

all depends on the child.

they actually don't have to start school until they turn 5, so you don't have to start them in that september

AbbaFan · 19/11/2008 20:53

My B-day is the 29th August, and I HATED it growing up. Always the last to turn 8, 9, 10 etc and by the time you get there, your friends start having their next b-day.

I also did always feel at a disadvantage through school - that might be because I was a bit thick anyway though

Mutt · 19/11/2008 20:54

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

cwtchy · 19/11/2008 20:54

I was born in August

I left school with three "A"'s at A level.

So didn't hold me back much.

DD is an August baby too and it doesn't bother her either.

Based on my experience, YABU and overthinking the situation somewhat

merryandmad · 19/11/2008 20:55

My dd1 would love to be born in August (she is actually early September)- as all her friends are now at school and she doesn't start until next year. could you look at it as though they might be bored stiff at home for a year without all their friends if you have a September baby?

Spaceman · 19/11/2008 20:56

You could say they are at an advantage as they are encouraged to keep up with children older than them throughout school and develop at a faster rate.

I dunno, my DD was born right at the end of August and I've heard good and bad predictions about how this will affect her throughout school. She's luckily tall for her age and very bright and articulate, so I don't worry at all.

It's also nice because you don't have to have all her school mates around for her birthday party as her b'day is always in the holidays.

If you are that worried you'll have to leave it longer than a month anyway in case baby arrives early.

Good luck in ttc.

Jun · 19/11/2008 20:56

I'd be thinking 'what if' if it was me. Like others have said they could be the oldest in the year below. Plus summer birthdays mean bbqs etc.

Original poster
DodgyApostrophe · 19/11/2008 20:56

Well I was born in July and I've done ok, but I still think I'm going to hold off.

OP posts:
Portofino · 19/11/2008 20:57

My sister did OK. Qualified Accountant and all. Had lots of friends at school, though didn't like it much to start with.

RedLollyYellowLolly · 19/11/2008 20:58

I was born on 25th Aug. Have a good educational record (As at A-level, good degree...) so I can't say it held me back educationally but I do think (from what I can remember and from what my mum says) that I did suffer a bit emotionally starting school so young.

Mind you who's to say that I wouldn't have struggled starting school at an older age (I was a PFB)? And some schools do a Jan intake which I think might help.

Good luck TTC whenever you do decide to try

nowwearefour · 19/11/2008 20:58

btw i think dcs are a bit disadvantaged in the first few years but do they do catch up eventually!!!

llareggub · 19/11/2008 20:59

I can't say it has bothered me, being an August baby. School was fine too, but is this really about August babies, or do you think you need a break from TTC? It can be emotionally tough.

shopaholicDIVA · 19/11/2008 21:00

wow, seriously planned.
i was so desperate for baby it did not calculate any disadvantages, ds born in late august last year
you can carry on being overcautious about everything in life in case it happens that happens or this could be disadvantage etc...
every child is different.
[i bet your xmas cards are ready to ve delivered]

Dropdeadfred · 19/11/2008 21:00

hmmm..forgive me but after having 7 mcs and an ectopic I'dbe ecstatic to have a baby whatever month they were born

wickedwitch81 · 19/11/2008 21:00

YABU - my little girl was born 08.08.08, the luckiest day of the year.

KatieDD · 19/11/2008 21:00

I have one wouldn't do it again bless her, she's found it tough at times, plus everyone is usually away for her actual Birthday. Feb is the optimum month apparently.

thegreatescape · 19/11/2008 21:00

Madonna was born in August and doesn't seem to have held her back.

DH was early Sept baby, went to oxford (so genius) with nice bum and scored fabulous wife the lucky beggar!

Original poster
DodgyApostrophe · 19/11/2008 21:01

You could be right llareggub. It's quite nice not having to think about it this month.

Although some of you are making me want to give it a bash anyway!

OP posts:
Pesha · 19/11/2008 21:04

My ds1 is an August baby, if I'd held him back he would have still had to go straight in to yr1 so he started when he was just turned 4 and did struggle. He is now in yr1 and has gone into a mixed yrR/yr1 class and is doing brilliantly but we did have a very hard few months with him.

I have read a few studies on August babies and statistically it does put them at a disadvantage so I can understand where you are coming from. But at the same time a September baby is more than likely going to be quite frustrated in play school (dd is Nov baby and she was very bored for at least the last 6 months of playschool) and you will be stuck with them for an extra year!! Ds2 is a spring baby and I think I got it right with him!

But there are always going to be disadvantages and advantages for children in life whenever they are born and whatever you do so I'm not sure its really a big enough reason to hold off on trying.

Libra1975 · 19/11/2008 21:06

I was born late Sept and was very young for my year as back in the old days they didn't have such a rigid cut off point. Managed to get 11 GCSEs,3 A-levels a BSc and a good job. It's about the intelligence of a child not the age they are give or take a couple of months. (I'm not saying I'm very intelligent just that the difference of 3-4 months is not a lot!)

Ashantai · 19/11/2008 21:06

Have to agree that its a bit petty to even care what month your child is born if you are so desperate for a baby. What if the due date is september and the baby is early?, watcha gonna do? cross your legs??!!!

My son was born on the 25th July and just misses out every year on having his special "birthday day" at school, but guess what, he copes just fine