Does anyone else dislike splitting the bill?

[Savedbythebell36]

Unless you've had something very similar and the price difference is pennies.
I went out with a group of friends the other week, I don't drink alcohol and most of them do. I had a starter as a main course, and two diet cokes.
It came to £33 each when splitting, even though my starter was i think £8.99 and two cokes around £8 in total.

That included a tip, but that would've meant me leaving a £16 tip which sounds extreme. I wish I'd spoken up really, next time I will but you're labelled as 'tight' if you do that. I asked them to confirm again, and nobody said 'you've only had a starter/soft drinks whereas we had more.'

It does put me off going sometimes but I suppose if your friends call you tight/cheapskate then they aren't real friends? I'm on more of a budget too.

I didn't just not eat much because of cost, it was also as I'm watching my weight/get very bloated if I eat big meals.

Just speak up. I'm sure nobody would mind if you pay your portion and the rest split

I really don't mind when it's obvious that someone has spent much less than everyone else if they say - 'but I only drank water' here's mine with a tip. Just do it early on in the bill splitting. Or say do you mind if we all pay what we owe...

If someone is calling you tight - that's not fair....

It’s your job to speak up for yourself, not your friends to notice what your stuff costs and point this out to you. Just speak up next time

Agree. Somehow it is always the big spenders who want to split.

You need to be more assertive. Either say upfront, or when the bill comes say 'mine was only £17 so I'll put in £20, and the rest of you divide up as you like'.

Why on earth did you let them bully you into paying nearly twice as much as the value of what you consumed?

Is this a regular occurrence, if so why…

Or, when orders are taken, ask for separate bills.

It's not up to others to notice what you're eating. You need to spit it out if you're not having the same as everyone else.

You should say something! When I’m out with friends and it comes to splitting the bill, I would notice if one of them wasn’t drinking and would say myself that the drinks should be split separately, as it’s not fair to pay for other’s wine etc!

Because you get labelled as cheapskate, tight etc (I've been called it before)

We go out with a group of friends. One girl I am very close to in the group and she would tell me on the side that they are struggling with money. Rest of the group would have no clue. She would order a starter and maybe a beer. Another lady was on the steak and cocktails, no way was I letting the bill be split in a way that my friend is paying for what she hasn’t eaten and drank. I worked out when I got home that if that had happened the lady that had ordered steak and a load of cocktails wouldn’t even have paid enough for what she consumed. But my friend would never have stood up for herself.

I don't drink, my friends always remove the alcohol, and then split the food bill, then add the drink cost onto the their bill. Anyone who thinks it's ok to split the bill evenly with a non drinker knows full well what they are doing. With other groups of people I go out with, we just work out what our portion comes to , decide on what to add for a tip and then all pay separately. My daughter is 28 and she said they never split the bill, and thinks it's a strange thing to do, everyone pays for what they had. I don't begrudge a round of drinks with my friends, but I'm sure as hell not subsiding everyones meals and drinks. Any one who thinks that's tight is just a freeloader.

So? You just say no I’m not, I just don’t want to pay double. Not sure what else anyone can say here really

Why didn’t you say something? I never split the bill unless we all had something similar.

im sorry, I agree it is absolutely on you to speak up. However we split the bill I won’t be keeping track of who is having what, why would I do that for anyone other than myself?

The point to speak up is when you order.

Say up front you will be ordering separately Make sure your order is on a separate check. Tthen you don’t need to get involved in any bill splitting. Simples.

I’m all for splitting the bill if everyone had more or less then same, but I would notice if you had less and point it out and adjust your share accordingly.

I dislike it because it often means the poorest person(s) in the group subsidising the most well off.

I probably wouldn't bother going out to eat with friends if I was only having a starter and they were having the full shebang.

But if I did decide to, obviously I'd just pay for what I'd ordered.

These threads are becoming increasingly common and I'm always surprised at the amount of 'starters only and soft drinks' OPs, who never speak up.

It doesn't have to be a big deal.

This issue is as old as time!

From my waitress days which was many years ago its a real pain for the restaurants. I notice some wont do anymore. If you really are a no/light drinker and eat little then you really need to speak up before.

I have a relative who when he knows someone else is paying or thinks its going to be divided equally stuffs himself silly. He honestly doesnt think anyone has noticed even though huge hints have been made..

Just say you're just paying for what you had. That's perfectly reasonable.

It's not tight to feel awkward subsidizing someone else's more expensive meal. I am happy to do it both ways as I'm a small eater but always get an alcoholic drink. So it tends to work out same anyway. But I would not assume it, I'd ask. And if I had way more expensive I'd automatically just pay for my own.

Perfect!

You need new better friends!!

This thread along with the secret Santa ones, always go the same way, where all the reasonable ,typical people will agree with you, some will tell you to speak up/ put your foot down and finally it will attract the intensely annoying outliers who will call us all joyless , tightfisted windbags and what's the problem, it's only money and a bit of fun /lifes too short 🙄.

I think I've covered everything.

Speak up, if I was called a cheap I’d owe it and say yep that’s me, maybe you need to change friends, non of mine would have an issue with it.

I'd just remind people you didn't drink when you're paying, and pay your section. Nobody will mind. Nobody else has kept such a close eye on what you've consumed, in most circumstances, and it'd be weird if they did!

Just say, "Oh I didn't have any wine, I'll pay mine upfront" and they'll recalculate the split without your share. It's not a big deal but you can't passively expect someone else to remember your order and advocate for you.

If that's the case I would stop going out with them - a good friend would just listen and play fair if that's what you're asking.