Considering a holiday with a group half my age, where most are strangers.

[Whathappend]

I'm 50. I'm good friends with a 25 year old. I occasionally go out drinking and dancing with her and her friends.

Last night we were out. They were talking about their loose plans to go to ibiza next summer. I was enthusiastic and told them i was excited for them. This turned into an invite for me to join them.

I have wanted to go to ibiza my entire life. I love dance music and dancing until the early hours. But none of my friends in my life have ever wanted to join me on an ibiza holiday. And i don't want to go alone.

So I'm seriously considering taking them up on their offer.

However, they're half my age, so i won't be able to keep up. I've only met her friends a couple of times. They're nice enough, but not sure i want to go on holiday with near strangers. They've got less money than me, so I'll need to eat/sleep on their budgets. No nice meals out on holiday. And everything we do will be on their agenda and i won't feel i can interfere with that too much.

But i really want to go to Ibiza!

I'm a friendly person who gets on well with most. I can rough it for 4 days, and tell them I'm staying in if i need to rest. But still...

AIBU considering going with a bunch of 25 year olds where i only know 1 of them?

@Whathappend “Ah. You're not enjoying being called out for being judgemental.”

Wrong. I said myself that I DO judge it! I don’t give a damn about being called judgemental. Everyone is judgemental about certain things.

You’re clearly sore because you want to believe a bunch of 25 year old girls want a woman who’s old enough to be their mother (probably older than some of their mothers), to go on a clubbing holiday with them. You know in your heart it was a spur of the moment thing, and not a genuine invitation.

@Mermaidmusing That is fantasic! I would love to do cookery classes! Googling now for ones near me!

I think because you said yourself you 'hated clubbing' even at 19/20? Is that why you find it 'cringe' possibly?

I still 10000% think @Whathappend should go raving in ibiza whether the invite stands or not and dance like noone is watching (or judging)😊

Cookery classes are fantastic! I love learning how to cook a new cuisine or dish and you’re completely immersed in it for half a day or a full day so it’s a great way to switch off from everything else. If you go as a solo, they’ll usually pair you up with another solo, although most people do it as a pair. So it’s a great thing to do with a friend.

Admittedly, I always hated clubbing, even when I was young. But if over 50s really want to do it, I think they should do it in a group of their own age, not tagging along with youngsters, that’s the bit I find cringe. I don’t judge anyone hitting the dance floor at a wedding, etc, that’s a totally different scenario.

After DH died I made a vow to say yes to every invite, even those I might not love.

Life changing, and this is exactly the kind of trip I went on. I wouldn't be keen on a fortnight's holiday, but a few days will be great. My mantra was what's the worst that can happen? If you're not on a budget, you can always fly home early or book a different hotel if it's that bad. But it won't be.

I'm really surprised how negative people are being. Life is so much better when you say yes.

I once went to a foreign city and ran a marathon because a man I barely knew asked if anyone fancied it, over coffee at parkrun. I ended up having a brilliant weekend with him and two of his friends.

You have kids @Whathappend ? How old?

You say that not one single one of your contemporaries friends want to go with you @Whathappend … have they given a reason?

I read all the posts a few days ago and I thought sounds like fun! I really was hoping when I saw the thread at the top of the list that the OP was coming back to say it was all booked! The whole thing about music is that it brings people together of all ages. I really hope you do get to go and have a fabulous time and come back and tell us about it! Life is so short, we should all do the things that we want to do when the opportunity presents itself.

But if over 50s really want to do it, I think they should do it in a group of their own age, not tagging along with youngsters, that’s the bit I find cringe

Thats my thoughts exactly

Wow. If your friends are all the same age as you, you'll find you are very lonely in old age, once they start dying.

What does it even matter if it's "cringe"? Stop worrying about what other people think and live your own life.

I’ve already said I’m a teacher and have a range of friends from late 20s into their 60s. I do different activities with different groups. I’m mid-50s, I wouldn’t dream of going clubbing with any of them. Clubbing is for young people, everything about clubbing is aimed at an under 35 demographic (and that’s being generous). If over 50s are hellbent on clubbing, they should at least go to nights that are marketed at that age group or travel abroad with a group of roughly their own age.

What difference does it make whether OP has kids?

Mixed groups are great.
Being the only older person in a group of 25yos is odd esp on a 18-30 type holiday

Because if same age which very reasonably could be - maybe ask them?

By the kind of holiday you are describing, I think it sounds like a disaster waiting to happen. I don’t think it’s just necessarily the age difference but also the location and type of trip it is.

I’m curious why not a single one your friends fancy a trip to Ibiza?

I see your reasoning, but I don't see the point in asking them because they're different people than the group OP is considering going away with. They won't necessarily have a view on this that's the same as the group has.

Clubbing really isn't for young people. In fact the young don't go much, it's why all the old clubs are closing. Most nightclubs will be a really mixed age group now.

Wow, it's really clear that many of the people here are waxing lyrically and judgmentally on a subject they know fuck all about!
I went to Ibiza in April with two other Late 40s school mums. And I am going back next April for my 50th.
It was incredible. I didn't feel too old at all and there was a huge variety of ages, nobody gave a stuff. We are all very experienced travellers and have lived overseas. One of my friends is an alternative travel agent and lived in Ibiza for a while. She goes 5 or 6 times a year so knew the best places to go. I don't know about the mega clubs but Pikes and Las Dahlias/Akasha were brilliant. She much prefers the start and end of season and lots of people seemed to be locals or regulars or were competing in the Ibiza half marathon which was the same weekend. I chatted to loads of interesting people.
Not sure I would fancy going with 25 year olds to the super clubs but my 49 year old hairdresser did with the girls from her salon and loved it.
Honestly, I think one of the over 40s groups for single travellers would be great as a starting point, someone mentioned Red. You could go off and dance and socialise by yourself anyway and nobody would bat an eyelid.
I worried a bit about what to wear beforehand and it was wasted brain effort. Anything goes.