Considering a holiday with a group half my age, where most are strangers.

[Whathappend]

I'm 50. I'm good friends with a 25 year old. I occasionally go out drinking and dancing with her and her friends.

Last night we were out. They were talking about their loose plans to go to ibiza next summer. I was enthusiastic and told them i was excited for them. This turned into an invite for me to join them.

I have wanted to go to ibiza my entire life. I love dance music and dancing until the early hours. But none of my friends in my life have ever wanted to join me on an ibiza holiday. And i don't want to go alone.

So I'm seriously considering taking them up on their offer.

However, they're half my age, so i won't be able to keep up. I've only met her friends a couple of times. They're nice enough, but not sure i want to go on holiday with near strangers. They've got less money than me, so I'll need to eat/sleep on their budgets. No nice meals out on holiday. And everything we do will be on their agenda and i won't feel i can interfere with that too much.

But i really want to go to Ibiza!

I'm a friendly person who gets on well with most. I can rough it for 4 days, and tell them I'm staying in if i need to rest. But still...

AIBU considering going with a bunch of 25 year olds where i only know 1 of them?

Bah. Some people are determined to be close minded and unhappy. Enjoy yourself, OP, with or without the company of young people. Have fun trying new things. A number of my friends are 15 years or more older than me. Others are 15 years or more younger. We have a great time. Don’t let anyone discourage you.

It is a self perpetuating thing. The more you say yes, the more people ask 🤣

Is the trip to Ibiza town rather than San Antonio? Ibiza town is more upmarket and older. I might go for 4 nights, stay somewhere different than the youngs and only go clubbing twice.

It’s a gorgeous island

I'm not part of their friendship group!

So why would you want to join them on holiday, even if you were the same age as them @Whathappend ?

It’s the fact you say you aren’t friends with any of the group aside from one of them that would
put me off going.

Have you heard anything since @Whathappend ? Presumably they were planning for it to be imminently?

Not a dicky bird @Roosthename

And that's fine with me. I've said from the off I'm not going to chase.

I've been looking into the options suggested on this thread. There's potential

Good on you.

enjoy

Wise move
I sincerely hope you are able to find some like minded older individuals who are up for a party holiday.
Good luck 😊

Any exciting developments @Whathappend ?

Nope. I'm seeing my friend at the weekend, but won't mention it unless she brings it up.

I've decided i don't want to go and meet Facebook strangers that expect you to meet up with them. If they're annoying, they'll be hard to ditch and will ruin a night/holiday.

I still don't like clubbing alone.

So back to square one 😔

If you went with FB strangers then, go for a short break, and have some excuses if they really aren't your cup of tea.

But you already know that you'd have something in common before you went, ie you like clubs and want to dance.

Now I'm thinking about it, I wonder if any of the cities near you have FB pages for older clubbers. Then its only one night you are committing too if you don't like them.

You never know you could get some good friends doing that.

Did you friend mention it over the weekend?

What about getting In contact with a friend from the past who you used to go clubbing with @Whathappend

I was poorly, so had to cancel.

I'm loving the lateral thinking from you and @Newname26 Thank you both for your ideas.

I'm a big believer that friendships are for a season @Poppyrocksok and if they've naturally ended then don't revisit them. So i shan't be contacting friends where contact ended naturally.

And my nearest city is 2 hours away by train @Newname26 . It's London though, so your idea has potential. I'll have a look.

@Whathappend I really really hope you get to ibiza! Or anywhere in the world that you want to!!!

Hope your feeling better after being poorly. A holiday will certainly make you feel better😀

some friendships don’t so much end as just pause whilst life events dominate ie friends from uni.
but if you had a close bond with them, loved clubbing with them, and no big drama to the end, I bet they’d love to hear from you suggesting a clubbing reunion!

They were just being polite. They don’t actually want you to take them up on the offer.

You don't have to keep up. They're in a group so you can dip in and out of the activities to suit your pace without letting anyone down.
I'd have a quiet sober word with the one who was my friend and check it was a serious invitation, allowing her space to back out, maybe "It was a lovely invitation, but I'd not inflict myself on you.." and see if she is persuasive.
If so, I'd go, but would see it as doing my own thing and joining them when it worked rather than trying to do everything.

All these assumptions. 🙄 No one on this thread can possibly know that.

Thank you @Thebibleofdave ! Me too!

Such a dickhead post - you don't know that so why are you staying it as fact?

For those who were invested...

...I am one of 5 on a group chat that began last night.

I've told them I'll be joining them in Ibiza, but I'll choose my own accommodation once they've booked their Airbnb for 4.

All of them said they wanted me to stay with them, which was lovely.

I told them if they wanted me in Ibiza, then I needed my space.

One of the ladies I know less well said that she wants me there whatever the sleeping arrangement, which was rather affirming.

Looks like I'm on my way. I'm really very excited!

That’s great!

Have just RTFT out of curiosity being an old crone myself at 57 🙄

Chuffed that the trip is apparently now confirmed for Whathappend 😃

Utterly baffled by the responses from some posters who seem unaware of the Gen X phenomenon that the OP and I fall into - we continued writing the book on clubbing that was started by our parents in the swinging sixties. Are we all supposed to embrace jam and Jerusalem and break into the White Cliffs of Dover waving our knitting and deferring to Grandma status as soon as we hit 50? (Especially difficult if you don't have grandchildren).

Also, because I'm feeling cranky, there's a real double standard here. I am 4 years widowed and have a wide range of friends of various ages. However, some of them have backed off considerably since my life and soul if the party DP died, and yet I'm supposed to be building a new life and embracing my unwanted freedom, just not with them - partly because some of them are couples and I'm a "single woman", plus, they get all weird about my perceived "fragility". So if I made friends with a groul of younger women who invitex me on a jolly of some descriprion, according to some posters here I should remain in this Godawful no mans land ( no pun intended) because making new friends is rigidly restricted to my peer group, who don't want me either?

Life is too damn short my pedigree chums.

Hope the OP has the time of her life and we get to hear about it - bon voyage and may your adventure be splendid 😘 xxxx

That's lovely hope you have a great time x

That's absolutely brilliant, I'm so delighted for you. So happy you're going and they sound like lovely women. There are some out there 😉have an absolute ball 🍹🍸🧉☀️🪩