To think life is more of a pain in the arse than it's worth

[CurdinHenry]

Another day another random assortment of hassle and pain

And this is pretty much the best it's ever been (ok the 00s were better)

Aibu to wonder why this is a secret truth?

So sorry to hear about your chronic illness too. It's hard sometimes to be honest, trying to put on a happy, cheerful face and demeanour when inside you are screaming.

I do find too that if you have a fairly obscure, rare condition (like my movement disorder), there aren't always many people who truly empathise or understand. I find this to make me feel more sad sometimes 😞

But in spite of things like this, I try to find a way to make the most of it all and be grateful.

Why does it make you so uncomfortable. No one is going up to ppl in the street telling them life's shit. If it's so distressing for you to sit with difficult questions/emotions then don't read the thread!

Not a great advert for life. Meanwhile in the 21st century people are waiting in A&E for days, dying in corridors, they died alone during Covid.

It's what is called a philosophical DISCUSSION.
Honestly, I can't believe you are posting "in good faith" if you can't see that?

Why are people being so weird on this thread? It's like we are all in the Truman Show and someone is trying to whisper "it's not real"!
The OP isn't suicidal or depressed, she's just questioning the point of existence.

Have you seriously never done that?

No, I haven't! At least not since I was about 14. OP sounds like an over earnest year 9.

Exactly. But let people continue in their oblivious little bubble where they think they have control over everything and how they respond.

Let some of these people get up at their child's funeral and tell everyone they aren't going to waste time being miserable because life is what you make of it.

Sometimes things outside your control shape things, even if only temporarily, sometimes forever. That's not to say you can't still have a great life in spite of reality.

I know what you mean, I'm not unhappy but I was thinking today, as I do sometimes, my day to day life is so dull and repetitive! Yes sometimes there is respite like holidays, days out etc but most days it's routine and the same old problem of not knowing what to cook for dinner.

Yes, let's make depressed people feel they have to wear a mask and pretend they aren't depressed to make you more comfortable. While we're at it, how about we go back to putting people with disabilities back to being hidden away in homes so they can't make people uncomfortable? Anyone who has medical challenges should just stay home so they don't burden anyone else. Pretend that life is what it isn't.

I hope you never need support.

I'm not depressed. I have come to realise that life is neither good nor bad. It just is. There is no real meaning, other than what we create for ourselves. I don't find that at all depressing. I find it very liberating. It means I have true freedom to live my own truth and set my own terms for engagement with life and this planet. I love that.

There is always someone who has to generalise things.

I spent months trying to help a friend with depression. They had SO many paths and choices but chose not to take them and chose to ignore the help on offer.

You can take a horse to the water but...

Having depression stops people seeing the choices around them. They have choices though... just because they can't see them doesn't mean they are not there.

Now you're just being melodramatic and attention seeking, like all of the other edgy 'life is crap and anyone who says otherwise is a vapid sheep' people.

I'm sliding through perimenopause on a diet of whimsy and delusion. I am trying to romanticise life and focus on the little sparkles of joy that are dotted around. I'm working on an AlterEgo that takes over when things get tough, like Superman.

It can be really fucking hard to do when you are stuck under a mountain of work, chores and family needs but it has helped my mood considerably.

If you can't see them, you can't take them. Or until they are ready and able to take those steps, they can't be forced. That might even make things worse. It's not a real choice if you can't access it for whatever reason, even if that is just in your own mind. Sometimes people can be stuck for a while. It's frustrating to those around them but it's just as real as cancer or any other disability. Real clinical depression that is.

If you ever experience real depression, and there's no guarantee you won't ever, then you will understand that and have more empathy for it.

It's no good reasoning with people like @SunIsGreat. Not content with their own victimhood, they have to inflict their poisonous worldview on everyone else.

I have a fabulous world view and am having a great time with life. I've definitely been through more than most people but that has helped shape my world view for the better. It got me out of the daily grind and limiting worldview of what life should be. I actually live an enviable life now. You'd be envious if you knew what my life consisted of.

The way you are responding to people in this thread suggests that you are not all that content or happy with your life at all.

@BettyJoanPerske there is ONE dedicated thread for this which no one forced you to join. You're starting to sound controlling acting like we're not allowed to discuss this and trying to shut it down. It's truly baffling when you could just leave all the "negativity"! And yet funnily enough you're only adding to it in your own special way.

They're the only really negative voice on this thread. It's just a philosophical discussion. I think there is something going on for them that results in this thread being uncomfortable for them. They can exit it if they want.

I don’t give a shut about people who don’t exist anymore and their struggles. Likewise I don’t expect anyone to care after I’ve gone. None of us matter.

We matter to those close to us. That's good enough for me. :-)

Absolutely this. I've had a poster reply really rudely to one of my replies on another thread about "welfarisation" as that thread title was phrased. I wasn't trying to derail that thread at all with my account of my health/life experience in relation to resilience, but the poster decided my account was irrelevant 🫤

I think it is true to say that some people don't like to hear that others aren't well, or mentally struggling, as perfect lives and mental health are much better than that (!).😳 I felt really bad about replying on that thread, (and I know i shouldn't have taken it so seriously!) but some people don't really have much empathy.

You're absolutely right about the way that shows how some people don't think it is a good thing to see the depressed/chronically ill etc out and about. I've felt awful enough about my health at times, so this makes me sad to think about how some might find it a burden 😔

Well, guess what, there's a strong possibility that all this is utterly pointless, all the silly things you get wound up by - like threads on Mumsnet - it's all a big old waste of time & life has no meaning or point to it at all.

Maybe have a ponder on that. It's interesting to consider different points of view and philosophies.

You say the OP sounds like she's "an over earnest year 9" but you sound like an uptight pearl-clutcher 🤷‍♀️

I love this idea about an alter ego who gets you through perimenopause! I've got to try it! 😅👍

Buy two goats

I've not even opened that thread. I can guess what it's like. I haven't seen the post you reference.

I understand what you mean about experience in relation to resilience. I'm guessing the one person wrote your post off as irrelevant because it didn't line up with their beliefs or experience. That doesn't make your account and experience invalid at all, just different. Sometimes I think that those people might understand one day. Or they might get lucky.

Those who think your health concerns are a burden aren't worth your time or consideration. Those who can understand and be supportive, even if they don't have the lived experience, are the ones who matter.

And this, i must say, has cheered me up considerably 😅😎❤️

(I love your username BTW!)

That reminds me of when i was much younger, going past the window to Oxfam one day and seeing a goat cut out on display, that I loved! I really wanted to ask if I could have it, but I chickened out! 😅🤣