Ex wants me to lie to DS

[Magpiesinthegarden]

DS has broken his phone screen and it’s £200 to fix it. Ex and I have agreed that we will go 50/50 to pay for it to be fixed. Ex will take the phone in and I’ll send him the money.

Ex has said not to tell DS he’s paying me half towards it as DS wouldn’t like that his Dad is giving me money. So ex wants to lie to DS and say I paid the whole amount.

AIBU to be uncomfortable about lying to DS and should I either pay the whole amount or tell DS it is from us both?

His parents are fixing it. Doesn’t matter you’re divorced or what % each are paying. That’s not a child’s issue to
worry about.

why does it cost £200 to fix though? Cheaper to get a new, refurbished phone?

You both have raised a weird woman hating kid. You’re pandering to his unhinged attitude. I’d not be paying a dime for a phone for some kid who thought I deserved not to be pissed on if on fire?

There are many more problems that need urgently addressing than a phone screen. I’ve honestly never read so much messed up nonsense 😬😵‍💫

When your son is old enough and mature enough to pay for repairs to items he has damaged then he can have an opinion. For goodness sake has society forgotten to ADULT. He broke the phone he should be grateful it’s getting repaired at all. It’s none of his business who pays for it. Honestly!

Have a zero tolerance policy on lying in our family. Lying doesn’t make an unpalatable truth any easier to swallow when it eventually comes out. Better to sit with the discomfort of the truth than the discomfort of the lie, in my book.

I’d make sure DS knows, but just be casual. ‘Dad and I went 50/50 on the repairs because we have joint financial responsibility for your needs.’ DS doesn’t need to like it in this instance, so he’ll have to accept you’ve made a decision and respect it.

Tell your son the truth

about how much more his dad earns than you, about how he is OBLIGATED to support him and how both you and your ex will continue to do so.

WHETHER OR NOT HE LIKES IT.

and if he doesn’t… he can save up and fix his own goddamn phone.

you are raising a misogynistic monster here! Stop this BS now!

He broke it… the responsibility is for HIM to fix it.

fuck me! The entitlement!

your DS is not the boss of you!

A few years ago.Samsung quoted me £100 for a screen replacement. I think I did eventually manage to get it cheaper elsewhere. You could buy a whole new (cheap) phone for £200!

The OP says the screen was broken by his brother. Most parents would pay for a replacement in those circumstances.

What age is your DS.

He needs to realise that life and adult relationships aren't black and white. Don't lie to your DS, it's just too bad if it doesn't suit him.

Your ex is taking the piss it won’t cost 200 and I would suggest he get a proper screen cover the chances are if you give him 100 it’s more than enough just ring around a few places the chances are they will tell you 50/60 quid then you can tell ex where it’s much cheaper.

Be honest with your son and do not lie to him.

Ah, missed that! Thanks ☺️

You're tiptoeing around what will make a child "very angry"???

I think maybe you need to stop perpetuating this weird dynamic you've got going with your ex (men control women with their anger, women are expected to manage the feelings of men and lie for them, etc). Do you really want to pass it to the next generation?

Tell the kid the truth, and if he doesn't like it he can do without a new phone screen. Bonkers.

And 14 is old enough for him to hear "your father earns 4x what I do and any claims to be impoverished are untrue". Stop pandering to your ex's crap.

thats how young boys get sucked in to the ‘manosphere’…