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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

AIBU to stop therapy after learning my therapist’s husband is Reform?

812 replies

CanyonRider · 25/05/2026 18:20

I live in a small town. I started having therapy maybe a year ago. I feel it’s been working for me and I like my therapist. However I realised today that she is (very very recently) married to a man who recently stood and won as a reform councillor in our local election. I detest reform. I’m married to an immigrant (EU citizen) and am delighted that my kids are dual nationals and have the option of travelling, working and living in the EU should they desire. I’m also very pro the transition to green energy. I have solar and drive an EV. Finally I cannot stand Farage and the political grift embodied by people like him and Jenrick and am dismayed by the harms caused by Brexit.

My therapist is also an EU national and is here under indefinite leave to remain - as is my wife.
Read a few interviews with her husband today and he spouts the usual anti EU, anti immigration, anti green transition rhetoric you’d expect from Reform. I don’t feel comfortable continuing therapy with someone who’s married to a reform politician, and am very surprised that she is comfortable with his views and by extension those of Farage.

Am I overreacting?

OP posts:
Thread gallery
6
SingleSexSpacesInSchools · 27/05/2026 15:12

5128gap · 26/05/2026 18:14

Of course you didn't say you wanted Labour to win.
You stated the opposite, that you hoped that people would be put off a Burnham vote by your posting of the clip where he (stupidly) said he thought it was a small minority of women who didn't want TIMs in their spaces.
Alongside this he also said that the 'minority' as he saw it, needed to be accommodated and used the term 'biological males', all four years ago. He has since said his position has changed and committed to the SCJ. Which hardly identifies him as the world's greatest trans ally, does it?
Now you've googled Kenyon, if you lived in Makerfield, would you still rather have him as your daughters representative than Burnham in this two horse race?

https://www.spiked-online.com/2026/05/27/whos-the-real-misogynist-in-makerfield/

Probably sums it up better than I could. In fact I think I stand by every word of it.

Who’s the real misogynist in Makerfield?

Robert Kenyon might have told some crude jokes, but Andy Burnham backed an ideology that absolutely throttled women’s rights.

https://www.spiked-online.com/2026/05/27/whos-the-real-misogynist-in-makerfield/

LuckyHazelFox · 27/05/2026 15:22

Freud2 · 26/05/2026 17:14

You're the one that's misguided.

That poster does what the left does best. She's patronising people of colour by saying Reform treat them as tokens. They are so busy trying to be morally superior to everyone else, they show their own bigotry quite often. Then again, if she's the poster who was equally as patronising about an incident on a bus, we shouldn't be surprised.

Allisnotlost1 · 27/05/2026 17:04

SingleSexSpacesInSchools · 27/05/2026 15:12

https://www.spiked-online.com/2026/05/27/whos-the-real-misogynist-in-makerfield/

Probably sums it up better than I could. In fact I think I stand by every word of it.

Would you work with a therapist who didn’t believe in single sex spaces in schools?

TankFlyBossW4lk · 27/05/2026 17:08

I really wouldn't want to be treated by any professional who is that comfortable with racism. I really struggle with the normalisation of Reform and the racist grifters that run it.

Time to find another therapist.

Gofnfnf · 27/05/2026 17:23

Would you not associate with a Tory because Tory party members have said racist things? And they have

SingleSexSpacesInSchools · 27/05/2026 18:21

Allisnotlost1 · 27/05/2026 17:04

Would you work with a therapist who didn’t believe in single sex spaces in schools?

As long as I wasn’t going for therapy about toilets - yes. In fact I think that being exposed to different opinions and being challenged in my views is esential

I don’t want an echo chamber least of all in therapy.

Allisnotlost1 · 27/05/2026 23:14

SingleSexSpacesInSchools · 27/05/2026 18:21

As long as I wasn’t going for therapy about toilets - yes. In fact I think that being exposed to different opinions and being challenged in my views is esential

I don’t want an echo chamber least of all in therapy.

Fair enough, if you’re comfortable with that. It’s surprising, given you’ve described yourself as a single issue voter, that you want to be challenged. But it takes all sorts 🤷‍♀️

SingleSexSpacesInSchools · 28/05/2026 00:22

Allisnotlost1 · 27/05/2026 23:14

Fair enough, if you’re comfortable with that. It’s surprising, given you’ve described yourself as a single issue voter, that you want to be challenged. But it takes all sorts 🤷‍♀️

How is it surprising? I said I was a single issue voter two parties both have shown exactly where they stand on this single issue and labour have come out wanting unless you can show that they aren’t wanting…?

TankFlyBossW4lk · 28/05/2026 19:31

Gofnfnf · 27/05/2026 17:23

Would you not associate with a Tory because Tory party members have said racist things? And they have

Much as I'm not a fan of the bunch of Tory so called leaders we've had in the last decade, they aren't a party that is a Grift for a workshy anti-Semite and racist, with a uni policy idea of anti immigration. As if that would solve anything in this country.

Farage is a con man. His "party" is just his private business. He divides the country because it's so easy to get people to hate other people. Especially when they have nothing. What a toxic individual. I despise the normalisation of this. It has brought untold damage to the country.

SometimesInTheFall2 · 28/05/2026 20:06

So much aggro in the replies here - I am guessing a lot from Reform voters, or people who think that racism is not a deal-breaker in any kind of relationship. I suspect you'd get very different replies if it was about a different political party or about political views which they object to.

Completely with you, OP - you need a minimum of common ground in therapy, and with both you and your therapist being from the EU, this is deeply personal.

LuckyHazelFox · 29/05/2026 09:26

TankFlyBossW4lk · 28/05/2026 19:31

Much as I'm not a fan of the bunch of Tory so called leaders we've had in the last decade, they aren't a party that is a Grift for a workshy anti-Semite and racist, with a uni policy idea of anti immigration. As if that would solve anything in this country.

Farage is a con man. His "party" is just his private business. He divides the country because it's so easy to get people to hate other people. Especially when they have nothing. What a toxic individual. I despise the normalisation of this. It has brought untold damage to the country.

The country is already divided by the left. Farage is just addressing that on behalf of many of the electorate who see the damage the left have done. Henry Novak being a victim of that damage. So wonderful to see thread after thread calling for police brutality to end. No chance, he was white. That's before we even get to the reason why he was handcuffed and his punishment given precedence over the murderer who lied about being called a racist. Well done lefties for making that lie so easy now to shout and be automatically believed. Moral superiority is costing lives.

Allisnotlost1 · 29/05/2026 09:32

LuckyHazelFox · 29/05/2026 09:26

The country is already divided by the left. Farage is just addressing that on behalf of many of the electorate who see the damage the left have done. Henry Novak being a victim of that damage. So wonderful to see thread after thread calling for police brutality to end. No chance, he was white. That's before we even get to the reason why he was handcuffed and his punishment given precedence over the murderer who lied about being called a racist. Well done lefties for making that lie so easy now to shout and be automatically believed. Moral superiority is costing lives.

How disgusting to use the murder of Henry Nowak to score points. So concerned about him you can’t even be bothered to spell his name correctly. The police handcuffing him was wrong, and should be properly investigated. It has nothing to do with racism or the left.

bafta16 · 29/05/2026 09:59

The country is already divided by the left. Farage is just addressing that on behalf of many of the electorate who see the damage the left have done.

The country is divided by Cameron. Further back Thatcher. Then Farage jumps in.

The boats, the Hotels, none of it is by accident.

OneStarAwake · 29/05/2026 10:03

bafta16 · 29/05/2026 09:59

The country is already divided by the left. Farage is just addressing that on behalf of many of the electorate who see the damage the left have done.

The country is divided by Cameron. Further back Thatcher. Then Farage jumps in.

The boats, the Hotels, none of it is by accident.

The boats, the Hotels, none of it is by accident

What do you mean? No government wants to see the small boats crossing the channel, are you suggesting otherwise?

LuckyHazelFox · 29/05/2026 10:09

bafta16 · 29/05/2026 09:59

The country is already divided by the left. Farage is just addressing that on behalf of many of the electorate who see the damage the left have done.

The country is divided by Cameron. Further back Thatcher. Then Farage jumps in.

The boats, the Hotels, none of it is by accident.

What on earth are you talking about? Do you just pluck out any name because they represent Tory or Reform? Thatcher advocated the free market. She wanted people to be independent of state reliance. Giving council tenants the opportunity to own their own home at an affordable price? Yes such divisive action. Currently, this government is dividing itself but they aren't Tory or Reform so no news in MN.

LuckyHazelFox · 29/05/2026 10:12

Allisnotlost1 · 29/05/2026 09:32

How disgusting to use the murder of Henry Nowak to score points. So concerned about him you can’t even be bothered to spell his name correctly. The police handcuffing him was wrong, and should be properly investigated. It has nothing to do with racism or the left.

Rubbish. I'm not using his name to score points, I am highlighting the fact that the left are quiet on these disgusting turn of events and know it would be the complete opposite had Henry not been white. It is the same with anti-semitism. Why did the killer think to cry racism, plus his family in covering the lie?

imhoppingmad · 29/05/2026 10:13

So policing your own borders is racist now? Not wanting men living next to you, who think rape isn't illegal, is racist now? Wow. Some people are so "woke"👏. I bet they also live in places that don't have migrant hotels nearby. How very NIMBY.

I'd strap in before 18th June Op, Andy Burnham won't be winning a seat in Makerfield, it's going to be Reform. ✌

MrsBennetsPoorNervesAreBack · 29/05/2026 10:17

imhoppingmad · 29/05/2026 10:13

So policing your own borders is racist now? Not wanting men living next to you, who think rape isn't illegal, is racist now? Wow. Some people are so "woke"👏. I bet they also live in places that don't have migrant hotels nearby. How very NIMBY.

I'd strap in before 18th June Op, Andy Burnham won't be winning a seat in Makerfield, it's going to be Reform. ✌

I live very near a migrant hotel.

My 20yo dd volunteers with asylum seekers in a different city.

Neither of us have ever been threatened or made to feel uncomfortable.

It's deeply ironic that you pretend to care about women's safety while rooting for the misogynist Robert Kenyon.

OneStarAwake · 29/05/2026 10:19

imhoppingmad · 29/05/2026 10:13

So policing your own borders is racist now? Not wanting men living next to you, who think rape isn't illegal, is racist now? Wow. Some people are so "woke"👏. I bet they also live in places that don't have migrant hotels nearby. How very NIMBY.

I'd strap in before 18th June Op, Andy Burnham won't be winning a seat in Makerfield, it's going to be Reform. ✌

That would be a good result for Starmer as I doubt there will be a leadership challenge if Burnham doesn't win Makerfield.

Nice to see you want Starmer to stay.

LuckyHazelFox · 29/05/2026 10:25

OneStarAwake · 29/05/2026 10:19

That would be a good result for Starmer as I doubt there will be a leadership challenge if Burnham doesn't win Makerfield.

Nice to see you want Starmer to stay.

If Reform win, starmer merely gets a stay of execution. Meanwhile, London will burn - figuratively speaking - and the back benchers will continue to cause havoc. Great way to run a country.

Gofnfnf · 29/05/2026 10:28

MrsBennetsPoorNervesAreBack · 29/05/2026 10:17

I live very near a migrant hotel.

My 20yo dd volunteers with asylum seekers in a different city.

Neither of us have ever been threatened or made to feel uncomfortable.

It's deeply ironic that you pretend to care about women's safety while rooting for the misogynist Robert Kenyon.

Again I see you say this on so many threads.

What about all the women that have been harassed and made to feel uncomfortable. The women who have been raped and murdered.

Your DD is probably not alone and is in a secure environment where there are staff that can protect her. Take that away and she probably wouldn't fare too well.

OneStarAwake · 29/05/2026 10:28

LuckyHazelFox · 29/05/2026 10:25

If Reform win, starmer merely gets a stay of execution. Meanwhile, London will burn - figuratively speaking - and the back benchers will continue to cause havoc. Great way to run a country.

What do you mean by "London will burn, figuratively speaking"?

TankFlyBossW4lk · 29/05/2026 10:32

LuckyHazelFox · 29/05/2026 09:26

The country is already divided by the left. Farage is just addressing that on behalf of many of the electorate who see the damage the left have done. Henry Novak being a victim of that damage. So wonderful to see thread after thread calling for police brutality to end. No chance, he was white. That's before we even get to the reason why he was handcuffed and his punishment given precedence over the murderer who lied about being called a racist. Well done lefties for making that lie so easy now to shout and be automatically believed. Moral superiority is costing lives.

I'm sorry this is just a nonsense word salad

imhoppingmad · 29/05/2026 10:35

MrsBennetsPoorNervesAreBack · 29/05/2026 10:17

I live very near a migrant hotel.

My 20yo dd volunteers with asylum seekers in a different city.

Neither of us have ever been threatened or made to feel uncomfortable.

It's deeply ironic that you pretend to care about women's safety while rooting for the misogynist Robert Kenyon.

Just in the last couple of years :

Brighton Beach (October 2025): Three asylum seekers were found guilty of raping a woman who had become separated from her friends.

Cardiff (October 2025): Fawaz Alsamaou, a 33-year-old asylum seeker from Syria, was sentenced to over three years for sexually assaulting and strangling a woman in the Cathays area.

Warwickshire (2024–2025): Two Afghan teenagers were jailed for the rape of a 15-year-old girl in Leamington Spa, and another Afghan national, Ahmad Mulakhil, pleaded guilty to raping a child in Nuneaton.

Falkirk, Scotland (October 2023): An Afghan national who entered the UK on a small boat was convicted of raping a 15-year-old girl in the town centre.

Belfast (October 2024): Mohammed Ibrahim Hassan, a Somali national with a pending asylum claim, was sentenced to six-and-a-half years for a 2019 rape.

Walsall (October 2024) Rhiannon Skye Whyte, a 27-year-old mother who worked at the Park Inn hotel in Walsall, which was being used to house asylum seekers. In January 2026, Deng Chol Majek, a Sudanese asylum seeker, was sentenced to life in prison with a minimum term of 29 years for her murder.

But hey, you and your daughters haven't been attacked, so none of the above happened. I'm alright JACK.

I can't imagine being so insensitive to the plight of other women, just because it didn't happen to MEEEE.

imhoppingmad · 29/05/2026 10:36

OneStarAwake · 29/05/2026 10:19

That would be a good result for Starmer as I doubt there will be a leadership challenge if Burnham doesn't win Makerfield.

Nice to see you want Starmer to stay.

Ooh, you think you had a Gotcha moment there. Wake up.