Long distance relationship with a Tunisian man?

[JustCoralGoose]

In a nutshell I have been speaking to someone online from Tunisia for 4 years as great friends and recently he told me he wants to be with me and now he’s speaking about meeting me but he can’t stay for long on a holiday or visitor visa and because of his religious background he wants to marry me right away! If it weren’t for those things I wouldn’t.

Now for the longer version
I have asked him why he didn’t find a girlfriend where he lives and he did say he has dated quite a few women and I remember him mentioning he never met anyone that he really likes but he loves everything about me and my personality.
He is about the same age as me (20’s)
He doesn’t have a job but is supported by his father whilst he is studying and he hopes to get a job to do with something on the computer like coding and development although I don’t understand about things like that. I have seen some of his work and it’s too complicated for me to understand .
I’m in the middle of starting a business and have a lot going on in my life and to be honest this new relationship is taking a lot of my head space.
I’m aware there are cultural differences but I’m lying here thinking I would be off my head to marry someone I’ve only met in person once and we don’t know what it’s like to live with each other - I also don’t know if he understands the legal implications and that it would financially tie us together.
I can’t even say it is so he can obtain permission to come to this country as both him and his family want me to move to Tunisia - another conversation in itself as what about healthcare, I have a life here, and what about all my stuff like furniture because I would probably have to sell it all before I could leave.
If I (hypothetically) did my intention would be to start a business over there but I am aware that I would rely on him financially at first which I don’t want to do unless I had savings to live on.
I know nothing about the country and have never gone but from what I’ve seen it honestly doesn’t look like the kind of place I would want to live.
I have also only recently just head about the Tunisian love rat thing.
We have spoken over video call a lot and he is honestly so nice and such a kind man.
But I have not told anyone in person about the ‘relationship’ yet because I’m half worried they’ll think I need to go to a mental facility.
He has introduced me to his family over video call and they are aware he is in a ‘relationship’ with me and he can translate the languages - they speak some English but he’s hoping to teach us how to speak to each other.

Are you sure he's in Tunisia and not Lagos? Have you given him money?

You do know he's probably AI?

Let me guess ,hes a lot younger than you. Sweetheart. This isn't a relationship. You dont know this man. You might think you do. But you dont. You only know what he has told you. Do not get involved. Do not give him money.

Op don’t do it I had a friends family member do this madly in love blah blah family thought he was the real deal he left her with a load of debt never to be seen again. If you really thought it could go anywhere you do it on your terms slow no marriage if you meet make it public but honestly I would just reply sorry not looking for a relationship if the friendship fades you know he was using you. I would read posts on here the English men are bad enough not all but there’s a lot of cheating, lying, affairs, controlling abuse. You haven’t talked about him as you know everyone will warn you off him. He’s looking for a wife to move here.

no. clear your head out.

extreme cultural differences ahead and it’s not looking positive for you. You’re signing up for a tough life in an almost third world country living in your parents in law house (or very enmeshed with his family) in a patriarchal and unsafe country. Your rights would be minimal. Also, are you muslim?

and yes for sure he’d be interested to marry a (from his perspective) rich girl with a western passport

you’re in your 20s? come one you have the world at your feet.

don’t engage with this guy and do not move to Tunisia!!

What a disgusting comment.
Its not like picking a breed of puppy, she clearly likes his personality regardless of whether things are as they appear or not.

how did you meet him?

there’s so many complications. Just say you went over there, married and have a child but then it didn’t work out. It would be so hard to move back home again.

Don't be daft

This has to be a wind up?

Ignore, delete and block. Massive red flags. You’ve probably not told anyone in real life, as deep down you know it is all a scam.

To be blunt you are foolish to be giving this any thought at all.

if he really wanted to be with you he would get a visa to come to the UK on his own terms. A student visa for example should be possible. And then pursue the relationship. None of that will happen.

It’s a scam. He’s groomed you for years, his family are no doubt all in on it and he will have other women he’s spinning the same line to. Some of them get over here, divorce their English wives and take half her assets.

Let him go or it’ll end in tears.

This.

I'm half Eastern-European. (Dad was a WW2 Displaced Person.)

As soon as I hit marriageable age, I found that being a possessor of a British passport made me a very desirable person. Even now, the folk in EE think that the UK is the land of milk and honey... I believe that other countries hold folk with the same belief.

Be wary, OP. Don't fall for it.

Didn’t say it was. I’m saying if she has a type then there’s people here that fit that demographic. She doesn’t need to look for people she’d need to sponsor.

I'll add to my previous post. There are, unfortunately, some people who have no conscience about taking British people for fools - they think that we're all rolling in money. (Sorry to say that I include a small minority of my relatives in that. I once had a relative take me aside: "Aunty, don't give my parents any more money.")

Be very, very careful. Thee man needs to come here and be with you for a while before you get tied up with him. He has said he can spend some time here so let him. Cultural differences or not, he must realise that is common sense. He should respect that.

I know nothing about Tunisian men but am wary of people who want to marry someone quickly whom they barely know. That smacks of wanting to stay here and doing anything to achieve it. Don't be used.

You are both only in your twenties, there are more fish in the sea.

He may well be lovely, genuine and you live happily ever after but at the moment, be cautious. Very.

Thread of the day. Week. Month.....

I hope not. I don’t want to be on the daily mail

Red. Flag.

I think this situation has been pretty well documented over the years.
If this is true (which i doubt) He doesn't really want you to live with his family in Tunisia, he wants to live in the UK. He doesn't love you & he's testing you to see if you're a bit stupid and will fall for it.

Lets say he's not a scammer (unlikely)... You do realise that no man in their right mind would want to marry a woman they've met once, regardless of how religious they were.
Either way, this man is trouble.

Assuming the OP is real...

www.mumsnet.com/talk/am_i_being_unreasonable/5327245-to-think-that-women-who-fall-for-romance-scammers-are-idiots

True love is beautiful. Yes, marry him. You'll live Happily Ever After.

🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰

Literally just reminisced with my mum over brunch about my friend who married a man from Tunisia at 19. She was divorced before anyone else in our friendship group got married. He got indefinite leave to remain. That’s all he ever wanted.

@JustCoralGoose

Then listen to people on here.......