Feel a bit weird about what my cleaner did.

[DeadlyDead]

My cleaner has been with me for a few years. She’s a very nice woman, but can be a bit sensitive (if I give any feedback/ask for her to change something she does etc. she doesn’t take it well). I trust her- she has her own set of keys for my house, knows the alarm code etc. Good relationship overall- if I’m home when she’s here I’ll make us both coffee and we’ll chat.

She came on Monday for her usual cleaning appointment. I put my Christmas decorations up last weekend and she was very complimentary of them, asking where I got various bits etc. To be fair, I do go a bit OTT and love Christmas and this year’s decorations turned out especially well- I make a lot of stuff myself, and also have been collecting bits for years. We had coffee and then I needed to go out so we said our goodbyes, and I left her to it.

She lives about eight miles away from me, but we’re in the same area.

Today, I went onto Facebook and a post from a local group I’m in came up. It was a photo of someone showing off their Christmas decorations- I had to do a double take because it was my house! Pictures of my living room, hallway, landing, and sitting room, all decked out for Christmas. They were posted by my cleaner (under her own name- we’re not FB friends but both members of this group). The caption is along the lines of “not bad for a tired mum of three” and there are a few thousand likes and a several hundred comments (it’s a very big group). Lots asking where she got various items from and she’s replying, based on her asking me the same thing on Monday! In one comment she didn’t know where something was from and replied “I’ve had that for years, it was originally my Nan’s” 😮 (about a candle holder I got in Next c. 2019!!)

When I first saw it, I was a bit perplexed but didn’t dwell. Now that it’s sunk in, I’m a bit pissed off. My home isn’t instantly recognisable to strangers based on those photos, it does feel like a breach of privacy.

As I said, she can be quite sensitive so even saying this to her gently will likely result in her getting upset, and likely not coming to clean for me again. I can get another cleaner, but I don’t really want things to end this way as I’ve been happy with her until now.

In my shoes, would you be annoyed?

AIBU to be annoyed?

It's a breach of trust. You need to have a word.

She’s not a good cleaner!! She’s taking pictures of her clients home and then uploading it to the Internet and passing it off as her own home. She’s a fraud.

A good cleaner would say to OP ‘Your house and decorations are looking fabulous at the moment, would you mind if I took some pictures and uploaded them to my own Facebook page and said something like ‘Just one of the fabulous, festive homes I have cleaned this December and sprinkled my Christmas magic! For cleaning enquiries call me!

Now she’s shot herself in the foot because she just looks deranged. She’s a liar.

Even if she cleans well, I wouldn’t trust her again. How thick must she be to think OP or one of her friends or family wouldn’t see the photos??

@DeadlyDead this is super creepy!!

If the post was saying that these were the beautiful decorations for a house she cleans at then I wouldn't mind so much but passing the house off as her own is totally creepy, and the comments on where she got the decorations is even creepier.

I wouldn't trust someone who did this and it would make me wonder what else they have been doing.

I would screen shot everything then comment on the post saying "wow <cleaner name> your house and decorations look exactly like mine. The candle stick was sold by Next in 2019".

I can see why you’re annoyed. I think I would be more amused than annoyed but I don’t know as it’s not me in the situation. Very strange and sad really

Who cares if she's "sensitive"? Tough shit, she's totally crossed the line and I'd be letting her know, I wouldn't give a fuck if it upset her, she started this....

I wouldn't be gentle, I'd be demanding she took down all the pictures & firing her for that.

It's an outrageous breach of your privacy and you should be angry.

Its extremely creepy and I'm not sure you would be able to get past it. This person is in your home when your not there. She has complete access to all your personal belongings. If I were you I would be making my excuses and letting her go. I wouldn't bother confronting her.

It would bother me too. But also very flattering! But just incredibly awkward!! 😬

I'd sack her for that!

Annoyed?
I'd be furious. I would be around there to retrieve my keys tonight.
Alarm code changed and she'd be sacked.
I'm really shocked that people think it's funny, or are concerned about her self-esteem.
She doesn't get to visit her issues on OP.
Absolute piss take.

Yep, that's creepy as fuck.

A friend of mine once posted my baby scan on Facebook and pretended it was hers' for days before coming clean and passing off as a joke. In your situation I'd also be pissed off and ask her to delete it.

Sack her now. You absolutely do not want this woman having the keys to your home and your alarm code. As a poster mentioned upthread, watch the film single white female.

I'm currently working as a private housekeeper and this is a massive breach of both your privacy and your trust. It's also incredibly weird of her to do it.

I wouldn't be bothered about the breach of privacy given that you can't be linked to the photos but the single white female-ness of it all would make me sack her... you happen to have seen these photos, what else has she been up to???

I'd feel that's a breach of trust and privacy. I'd tell her to take the posts down and then get her to post your keys back whilst still arranging for the locks to be changed. She sounds a bit strange and if she tries getting into your house using her set of keys after asking for them to be posted back there would be no doubt in anyone's mind that she is doing so against your wishes.

I wouldn't be surprised if she's posted before about "her" beautiful home/lifestyle.

I’d report to Facebook on grounds that these are photos of your home and a breach of privacy and ask the to remove them.

The first thing I thought of is this woman has keys to your house and knows your alarm… how do you know that no one else she knows might have this information and has been in your home taking photos?

I think you’re absolutely mad to not question this the moment you saw the post. Anyone that can let this go is beyond weird imo

'Wow!!! LOVE the decs !!! They're a carbon copy of mine... oh wait!! They actually ARE mine!!'

Then message her with the screenshots making sure that the FB Group in showing, ask her to drop your keys off, pay what you owe her and tell her she's sacked.

Message, don't phone her
Proof and all that jazz

I see how you’re feeling bad for her because honestly who does this… but it’s really quite bad and she needs to know. It’s just so intrusive.

separately I really want to see all this cool decor now please post the pics

This is extremely sinister behaviour. I would one hundred percent get rid.

I would also change the locks and alarm code asap.

If this is what she posts on social media, imagine what she gets up to in secret. Pictures of your house could be being pinged to anyone. Keys could be being cut, alarm code shared. I’d be fucking livid.

My friends cleaner stole her identity and had several credit cards and loans in her name.
I would tell her not to come again. That’s not normal behaviour.

I'm afraid that I'd be cancelling her next visit & never book her again.

Its dishonest abd crossed a line. I would be concerned about blurred boundaries if she thinks its ok.

I would drop her a message asking her to remove the post and not photograph your house again. Then just see how she reacts.

If it ends badly itd because of her actions not yours.

I’d get a friend to comment “oh wow that looks exactly like my friend deadlydead’s house!”

Make her squirm!