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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Tried three places for lunch today and none cater for women

489 replies

Mrsmunchofmunchington · 22/09/2025 20:10

I went out for lunch today with a friend.
Well, at least we tried to have lunch.
All three places, two pubs and one cafe, were not suitable for women because you needed a penis to get into them or to use the toilet.
We ended up coming back to my home instead.

AIBU to think that everywhere should offer equal service to women?
Or is it my fault for not checking in advance that I could eat there without a penis?
Should I have researched on tripadvisor?
Am I too entitled expecting businesses to ensure non penis having people can pay to eat lunch at their establishment?

Day in the life of a disabled person.

OP posts:
Bobiverse · 22/09/2025 20:11

You’re going to have to actually explain where you tried to eat and why they were men only. Were they private clubs?

Springadorable · 22/09/2025 20:11

What are you on about?

MyAcornWood · 22/09/2025 20:11

You what? I feel like I’m missing something 😅

RunningNananananananananana · 22/09/2025 20:12

Eh?

HollyGolightly4 · 22/09/2025 20:12

I'm confused

warmapplepies · 22/09/2025 20:13

Is this one of those odd threads about shared toilets?

momtoboys · 22/09/2025 20:13

What is happening here? Did I miss a paragraph?

TheNightingalesStarling · 22/09/2025 20:13

I think I've got it... everywhere was wheelchair inaccessible and you were using sex as an analogy?

If so... yanbu.

TheProfoundlyPeculiarPointOfPete · 22/09/2025 20:13

Don't you keep a penis in your handbag for these occasions?

SoftPillow · 22/09/2025 20:14

I’m sorry for your day, but I’m a bit confused. You went for lunch and were denied entry as all 3 places you tried were male only? Are there many male only places left these days? Even the Garrick is mixed now

Bobiverse · 22/09/2025 20:14

Is this about places being inaccessible to women? Or inaccessible to disabled people?

Your title says women. Your post says women and not having a penis. Then you end saying it’s because you’re disabled. Being a woman isn’t a disability, so what is this actually about?

Dreamhigh · 22/09/2025 20:14

warmapplepies · 22/09/2025 20:13

Is this one of those odd threads about shared toilets?

Must be

Lollytea655 · 22/09/2025 20:14

Did you go for lunch in the 1800’s?

Original poster
Mrsmunchofmunchington · 22/09/2025 20:14

I honestly thought it was clear enough but replace not catering for women with not catering for disabled people.
I substituted women to try and give some insight into the injustice to a wider audience.

OP posts:
VickyEadieofThigh · 22/09/2025 20:15

I'm 67. This has NEVER happened to me.

WhiteRosesAndThistles · 22/09/2025 20:15

I'm confused.

MyAcornWood · 22/09/2025 20:16

Unfortunately it was about as clear as mud! I’m sorry you’ve been disappointed today.

Springadorable · 22/09/2025 20:16

Mrsmunchofmunchington · 22/09/2025 20:14

I honestly thought it was clear enough but replace not catering for women with not catering for disabled people.
I substituted women to try and give some insight into the injustice to a wider audience.

Edited

So why are you on about women and penises?!

SoftPillow · 22/09/2025 20:16

That’s clear now, thanks OP.

I’m sorry that happened, that’s awful. Were all 3 locations not accessible for you? That absolutely shouldn’t happen, where were you?

whatasillygoose · 22/09/2025 20:16

Mrsmunchofmunchington · 22/09/2025 20:14

I honestly thought it was clear enough but replace not catering for women with not catering for disabled people.
I substituted women to try and give some insight into the injustice to a wider audience.

Edited

No, it was a silly and confusing point.

I’m sorry you weren’t able to access venues but god, just post what you mean!

warmapplepies · 22/09/2025 20:16

Mrsmunchofmunchington · 22/09/2025 20:14

I honestly thought it was clear enough but replace not catering for women with not catering for disabled people.
I substituted women to try and give some insight into the injustice to a wider audience.

Edited

So why not say that? Hmm

Arlanymor · 22/09/2025 20:17

I don't know why you couldn't just write a thread stating that you couldn't go to three places for lunch today because they were not accessible for you given your disability. No need to confuse things by adding in biological sex. And yes, of course that is not acceptable. The only places near me that cannot cater for people with disabilities are incredibly old places that have rickety staircases and could never put in a lift because they are listed buildings - speaking here about mobility disabilities specifically of course.

reversegear · 22/09/2025 20:17

It wasn’t clear at all but I’m sorry if you haven’t been able to access places for food. Is there not an app or website that can clearly label which places have access? Isn’t that a legal requirement?

Coconutter24 · 22/09/2025 20:18

Mrsmunchofmunchington · 22/09/2025 20:14

I honestly thought it was clear enough but replace not catering for women with not catering for disabled people.
I substituted women to try and give some insight into the injustice to a wider audience.

Edited

It wasn’t clear but what does that have to do with having a penis?

Lollytea655 · 22/09/2025 20:18

In what way were these places unable to cater? The only places I can think of in our town that can’t cater are the really old ones, usually listed, and it’s physically not possible to make any further changes.