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Original poster

Magic Mike Live - Bride really unhappy

597 replies

Vickersz · 02/06/2025 05:31

I was given the task of organising my best friend’s hen. I, alongside our other friend, decided on Magic Mike Live. It’s very on theme for a hen and from what I have heard just a very silly dance show which gets people dancing and laughing (not at all seedy).

This will be the end of August. So great weather. We thought we’d go in a little tipsy (after bottomless brunch) and have a laugh as a group of girls (and a couple of gay guys). Finish with a dinner and some dancing. And Bob’s your uncle.

It’s all gone to shit.

Apparently the groom is not happy and thinks it’s a weird choice. He has told the bride he doesn’t want her to go. Everyone’s paid for the non-refundable tickets! There was a bbq last week and it was the main topic of conversation apparently. With all these weird theories as to why it was chosen. It’s not that deep!

My friend often attends bottomless brunch, dances on tables etc. And is no prude.

i genuinely feel ill! It’s being referred to as a strip show! The bride’s step mum and mum will be in attendance.

I really want to walk away from the whole thing.

I spoke to the bride and she is not happy at all

OP posts:
Nottodaythankyou123 · 02/06/2025 07:41

TENSsion · 02/06/2025 06:57

This show is not comparable to a strip club. That’s utterly ridiculous. It’s more like a stag do going to the theatre to see Gypsy Rose Lee or even burlesque. In fact, burlesque is much more risqué.

Also, it isn’t the bride that’s unhappy. It’s the groom.

OP, let the dust settle. If it’s still a firm “no” at the end of the month, put the tickets up for a sale with a 20% discount.

Then try and find a cheaper activity to replace it. Maybe you could watch Magic Mike on DVD as you mentioned the bride likes the films. 😉 or you could do an escape room type thing at your accommodation. You can buy the stuff to do it yourself for quite cheap.

I’m sorry this man has ruined your plans. It sounds like his mum and the bride’s mum are quite afraid to upset him so are throwing you under the bus. They happily bought the tickets thinking it was harmless and something the bride would like but aren’t speaking up.

Good luck OP. At least you’re not marrying this controlling and reactionary man 😃

Easier to blame the OP than confront the elephant in the room - they know it’s something she’d enjoy but the only reason she doesn’t want to is because he’s kicked off. Better to scapegoat the OP than admit to themselves that his behaviour (regardless of whether you’d personally enjoy the show) is unacceptable.

Cakencookieobsessed · 02/06/2025 07:41

RightSaidFrederica · 02/06/2025 05:40

Not that seedy! Gosh your bar is low.

It's a West End show in the theatre, not some grotty strip club. It's not my thing personally but you're thinking it's something it's not.

Elizabethbd · 02/06/2025 07:41

Could you pick another day for the hen do? Then everyone who wants to can attend the show, but the bride doesn’t have to.

Sugargliderwombat · 02/06/2025 07:42

It literally comes up on west end booking sites! Madness to be so bloody offended by it 😂.

Sounds like the groom wanted a strip club and is jealous!

CatamaranViper · 02/06/2025 07:42

I've just watched the trailer on YouTube for the live show and it wasn't what I was expecting tbh! I've never seen the films but I do know about them.
At first I was imagining it was like Dream Boys (which I absolutely hated), but it's more like cirque. Men and women, aerial skills, acrobatics, dancing (clothed as well as topless men) etc. I think it looks like a lot of fun (with the right crowd).

Anyways, OP I think it's shit that the groom is trying to have a say here. He isn't going, it's not about him. It's not some seedy, dimly lit 1 on 1 show. It doesn't appear to be disrespectful and I highly doubt any of the dancers have been forced into that line of work (I know not all strippers have either).

HighLadyofTheNightCourt · 02/06/2025 07:43

Peaceandquietandacuppa · 02/06/2025 07:09

Not one person who knows the bride blocked this so it clearly suits her. It IS. weird and controlling. The groom needs to refund everyone if he wants to block this.

Not necessarily. I mean, if it’s coming from her DH then it’s a shame but it is a real possibility that’s it’s just not her thing and she’s just never had that conversation with people.

It’s the sort of thing my friends would book thinking I’d like it as I’m the biggest party animal of us all but I’d actually hate it. It’s not my thing at all.
My friends got me a naked butler for my hen do - they checked with my DH and everything. I was mortified but never said anything!

TesChique · 02/06/2025 07:43

Orderofthephoenixparody · 02/06/2025 07:31

Both scenarios sound controlling and insecure.

Show quote history

I personally agree tbh but it's absolutely wild how double the standards are on here!

TesChique · 02/06/2025 07:44

Sugargliderwombat · 02/06/2025 07:42

It literally comes up on west end booking sites! Madness to be so bloody offended by it 😂.

Sounds like the groom wanted a strip club and is jealous!

Wow.

Lostworlds · 02/06/2025 07:47

I think it’s a difficult one, you’ve booked it thinking she would like it and all the other hens (including her mum ) are up for it but it’s probably something you should have checked with the bride about.

I know my mum wouldn’t enjoy it but would say on the chat that she’s up for going because she wouldn’t want to cause any issues whilst planning.

I think ultimately it’s the groom being unhappy which has made the bride upset. No one knows what they’ve discussed in private so they may have both agreed no strip joints so he hasn’t gone to one and he isn’t keen on her going to Magic Mike.
All you can do is speak tk the bride and ask what she wants from this, explain the tickets are non refundable and then ask the hens what to do next.

CantStopMoving · 02/06/2025 07:47

claretsage · 02/06/2025 06:54

If someone had done this to me on my hen do I would have walked out. The poor bride.

Then surely, as the bride, you should have given a list of things you wanted to do and things you would ‘walk out of’

mind reading is not normally a bridesmaid skill.

being rude to your mates who have taken time to organise something, in their own time, is a pretty awful thing to do. Brides should organise their own if they have something very specific in mind.

OP, I once had to go to an actual strip show for a hen do with the bride’s mother and aunties in attendance.! It was the weirdest, most unsexy thing known to man and cringingly awkward but I’ll chalk it up to experience. I don’t honestly think a Magic Mike stage show could possibly compare to what was etched into my brain from that night (not in a good way!)

Itsnotallaboutyoulikeyouthink · 02/06/2025 07:50

It’s tacky hell.

FrazzledHippy · 02/06/2025 07:50

It's a tricky one. Me and DH have always been of the opinion, we won't do something we know the other wouldn't be comfortable with. So for me, I absolutely wouldn't be happy with DH going to a show to leer at half naked women, no matter how tame. So, I wouldn't do it myself.

RampantIvy · 02/06/2025 07:50

Why do activities like this have to be a surprise to the bride. Wouldn't it be better to run any hen do activities past the bride before booking them?

BlueEyedBogWitch · 02/06/2025 07:51

I find the “double standards!” comments on here so bloody annoying.

First of all, you can’t have double standards when the playing field isn’t level for men and women. And it really, really isn’t.

Secondly, comparing the West End Magic Mike show, which employs professional dancers on a regular wage, with attendant health and safety assurances, insurance and a properly regulated working environment, to a seedy strip club employing women on some shitty zero hours contract with no protection in any sense of the word, is like comparing apples and oranges.

You’d see more nob at the Covent Garden ballet.

MargotTenenbaumscoat · 02/06/2025 07:54

I would have hated this. I don’t think Dh would have cared but he and the bridesmaids would have known it’s not something that I would have wanted to do.

Original poster
Vickersz · 02/06/2025 07:55

Itsnotallaboutyoulikeyouthink · 02/06/2025 07:50

It’s tacky hell.

Half the appeal!

The bride is an overworked GP. I thought she deserved a night of laughing with her mates.

OP posts:
BluebellCrocus · 02/06/2025 07:57

Gemütlich81 · 02/06/2025 06:08

Have you been to this particular show in London before?

No there isn’t an equivalent show for men but for hundreds of years there has been worse! Strip clubs, prostitution and porn shows.

The men in the show do not get fully naked and there are no individual dances with people in the audience.

Show quote history

Yes, the idea that men wouldn't do that sort of thing is hilarious.

crumblingschools · 02/06/2025 07:57

Although not in the same league as a strip club it still has an objectifying vibe to it. I would cringe if anyone had organised this for me, would cringe even more with DM and MIL there. If I was asked to attend a hen do that involved this I would make my excuses.

Maybe as others have said bride and groom had discussed their boundaries, and this falls within the boundary. But then bride should possibly have mentioned it to the hen party organiser

FedupofArsenalgame · 02/06/2025 07:58

Sassybooklover · 02/06/2025 07:07

I wouldn't have an issue with Magic Mike Live at all. However, it's very much personal opinion and wouldn't have booked it, unless I'd had agreement from the Bride. I'd hate a drag show, that isn't my cup of tea at all, and if someone booked that for me, I'd be annoyed (in fact one of my bridesmaids did suggest it to the other, and thankfully she vettoed it!). You're not going to get refunds, so those who want to go and have paid will be going. If the Bride chooses not to go, that is her choice, but you'll have to organise something else for her instead, quite possibly another night.

See it seems that 20 people in total thought the bride would like this. So seems as though it is something she'd go for. ( I haven't been on a hen night for 25 plus years and that was the Chippendale s lol)

Now the groom is moaning and putting pressure on the bride

If everyone else likes it then do anyway. If not whoever doesn't want to go can sell tickets. BUT I wouldn't be organizing anything else for this bride

AngelinaFibres · 02/06/2025 07:59

Fourteenandahalf · 02/06/2025 06:18

Well why did they pay for tickets then, if everyone except for the op thought it was a terrible idea?

Show quote history

Group pressure presumably.The need to remain 'fun' 'cool' 'one of the crowd ' where the crowd seems to want to do this . I'm 60 this year. The organiser of our walking group is single and wanted to organise social events at weekends as well as walking . She suggested a silent disco option. It became a meal, dressing up in 80s disco gear and a silent disco. Lots of people said ' oo yeah, such fun' but then ' tragically' were already booked for something that weekend. I should have said I had another event but I was honest and said politely it wasn't my thing so no thank you. She became really nasty that I didn't approve of her idea, had been honest that it wasn't my thing and wouldn't be going.A little clique of 'fun' people rose to the surface and discussed their outfits and lifts and where they would be eating for weeks and weeks I'm old enough( and married with a life that doesn't depend on being part of any group) to be honest and to not care whether someone likes me or doesn't but the 'oh we musnt talk about it near Angelina it's not her thing' tinkly laugh, tinkly laugh became a right fucking pain.I called her out on it in the end and was told 'ooo relax , I'm just taking the mickey' When I was in my early 20s I would have hated any of the hen do shite that is now a compulsory part of life but I doubt I would have felt able to say " no thank you that's not for me'

FlightCommanderPRJohnson · 02/06/2025 07:59

Regardless of the nature of the entertainment, this situation is the bride's fault for leaving the organisation completely up to someone else.

She should have given you an idea of what she wanted, OP, or at least stipulated that you consult her before booking anything.

saraclara · 02/06/2025 07:59

I'm guessing that the groom doesn't actually know what Magic Mike is.

MalcolmMoo · 02/06/2025 08:00

PumpkinsAndCoconuts · 02/06/2025 07:12

I am 31. How is that relevant?

I am not saying that it‘s generally inappropriate for every hen do. I am however saying that it is clearly not appropriate for this one.
Why? Because the bride doesn’t want to go.

Is it possible that she would want to go if she was getting married to a different man? Yes. But that is completely irrelevant. Seeing as she is getting married to this one.

As for those calling him reactionary or controlling: Is he truly? Or do they (they = this bride and this groom) simply have boundaries and limits in their relationship?
Their boundaries and limits don’t have to be our own to be valid.

Edited
Show quote history

I was simply curious as to whether older people had been to the more modern type of hen do that’s all. I’m allowed to ask 😆 😆 😆

it seemed appropriate for the bride until her controlling fiancé got involved…

all of her friends, mum and mum of the groom thought it sounded great!

TheCurious0range · 02/06/2025 08:01

I'm not offended easily and definitely not a prude but this would be my idea of a nightmare, it's just so tacky. I would've been so upset if this was my hen, having said that, that's why I organised my own!

Liondoesntsleepatnight · 02/06/2025 08:03

Stick with bottomless brunch then Bride can go home? You do MM?

I would quickly ask in the group who wants to do MM, then you do that with the remaining people after MM, if short on numbers get others along, your gays might know extra people who want to come?

as for the bride make the Bottomless brunch her big event and book her a fancy car home? If she pulls a face explain non refundable costs. You could also offer to do something the night before? cocktail making at All Bar One? Theatre etc or night at someone’s house?