Would you be annoyed if a relative bought a house 3 doors down from you without telling you?

[Housequery1]

That’s it really, you bought anew house and a few months later a relative buys a house a few doors down, without saying a word. Would you be annoyed? Or would it even bother you?

None of my relatives would even consider living where I live. Few of them have even visited.

My MIL did do exactly this - moved four doors up😭😭😭

It was kept a bit hush hush (well from me - perhaps my husband knew...) and I find it hugely intrusive and massive overstep, but as a PP said that's because of the history and the people involved.

I definitely think it's best to send a casual message along the lines of what @DancingDucks said. I might also say something along the lines of "it's still a bit up in the air so keep it under your hat for now" to try and keep a lid on it spreading round the whole family.

I used to live close to 1 of my siblings not the same st but a couple of minutes walk. They hardly answer their phone so if someone needed to get hold of them urgently they rang me. I was expected to run around there. I get on ok with them but I don’t miss playing messenger.

Just tell her before any other family, and while telling her, offer immediate assurances that you won’t be nosy neighbours or popping round unannounced. It’s a pity you couldn’t have offered on a house a bit more than 3 doors away but it’s done now…

Yeah this sounds good, thank you.

The fishiest of fish.

Are you sure you want to live that close if you don't like family knowing your business? You can't help but know a lot if you live that close by. Maybe you could tell her soon but but ask her not to pass the news on until your mortgage is approved.

Yeah I would tell her soon “Hi cousin, I didn’t want to say anything until it was going through, but I’m moving to your road! Don’t worry I won’t be popping round all the time haha. Just saw the house pop up and loved it.x”

it was the last house with the number of bedrooms we needed left unfortunately. I had no choice.

Personally that wouldn't bother as long as they don't want to pop over for a cuppa every few day and they are nice people (not neighbours from hell, been involved in family drama etc).

When I say I don’t want people know my business, I mean I don’t want people to know that I’m in the middle of purchasing a house. They’re not really going to get much else from my daily comings and goings to be honest. I lead a very boring life with a 9-5 job. 🤣

Well hopefully she’ll be fine about it and I hope you will be very happy there 💐

ah I hope so, I do love the houses, I’m so excited 🙌

Yes

Yes, I’d be annoyed.

I do think you should mention it to them, just out of common courtesy.

If you don't get the mortgage you can tell them you didn't like the house because the neighbours were all a bit sketchy 😂

No but no reason not to mention it though!

You should never let someone have this much power over you. You are prepared to make such a drastic change to your life because a family member moved on your road?
Very extreme

I would be absolutely horrified if you did this to me. I think you ought to at least mention it to them prior to purchase, rather than waiting until it's a done deal.

Even potentially calling in would have me a bit on edge!

Anyway, what if she keeps turning up at yours with a cheery wave and a coo-eee. Could you cope with that?

I would be very annoyed if a relative bought a house three houses away from me without telling me. I wouldn't like living so close to most of my relatives in the first place, but it would be their lack of courtesy in not letting me know what they were planning ahead of time that would really piss me off. It is just common courtesy to give someone a heads up in a case like this before you actually purchase the house.

Unless we really didn't get on, I wouldn't mind one way or another.

But I would find it very weird that you didn't tell me till the sale had gone through. It would feel very unnatural to me that you hadn't even dropped me a line to say you were thinking of buying a house in my road.

If it was an aunt/cousin it wouldn’t bother me as either we would continue with the relationship we have or we might even get a bit closer. But I’d be miffed if they didn’t tell me.

Won't your children probably start to hang around a bit with their children? That could introduce points of contact (and conflict).

I'd wonder why no one had mentioned it, and as others have said, it would very much depend who and if we were a determining factor.
During my marriage I've lived on the same road as my late parents for many years and my ex SIL has been a current neighbour (three doors away) for almost twenty years. Both without issue.
Ten years ago MIL was looking to downsize and unilaterally decided she wanted daily support. She never discussed it and was bad enough living half an hour away. Fortunately, although she'd always dismissed our area, a much smaller bungalow here costs far more than hers. It didn't cross her mind that we wouldn't welcome the idea of daily meals and visits.