I don't like my engagement ring 😞 (pic)

[Marooney]

Last night my partner proposed, which was lovely. I often like simple and classic in general but this ring just feels so small and generic, I'm sad. Also I have quite big hands and I think the ring is kind of swamped. He went to choose it after work apparently and went to the shop he knows in town. He said if I didn't like it I could change it, but I've had a look at the shop's website and honestly they don't have anything I like better. I like more vintage styles (lots on Etsy that I like), bigger stone (could be moissanite, I don't mind if it's not valuable) and this shop just has modern looking things, this is the best of the lot. Unfortunately they only do exchanges, not refunds. Not sure what to do :( I guess the AIBU is AIBU for feeling disappointed with this ring, and AIBU for seeing if he minds me using the shop credit for some future birthday and Christmas presents (it was about £360) and looking for a ring elsewhere. Any other suggestions welcome 🙏🏼

Oh no that’s a really tricky one - could you keep the engagement ring & when you get your wedding ring get one that makes the set more to your taste ?

Yanbu because we can’t help what we like but I love the ring and from the pic it looks like it suits you!

I think it is lovely he proposed and chose a ring and congratulations on getting married.

But I take your points on the ring. I don’t wear gold so that would be my issue with it.

Could you use the diamond he bought and maybe get more added or reset or recut? It’s annoying the shop will only do exchanges if you don’t like their style.

Have you told him you don’t like the ring?

Would the money cover a pair of wedding rings, then go elsewhere for an engagement ring?

This is a good plan 😀

I think it's lovely! Would your 'big hands' feel more balanced out if there was a wedding ring on there too? Maybe time to decide a date for the wedding....

Your partner does a lovely thing, and you find it ok to come online and complain about him? Lovely.

@DoublePeonies makes a good suggestion.

Doesn't sound as if he out much thought into it to be honest, did he literally just decide yesterday and went to the jewellers after work?

That's a good idea.

Another vote for this solution

I really like it! But my opinion doesn't matter. Can you wear it for a bit and see if it grows on you? You could alway swap it on an anniversary, for example, for something more you?

I love it, it really suits your hand

I think this is a bit harsh. It is difficult as it is something OP will be wearing for many years and if she doesn’t like it that’s not great.

Congratulations on your engagement! I voted UANBU because your feelings are always valid. I feel that ring is quite generic and if your partner knows you and your tastes, they should take these into account. When I proposed, i did it with a custom ring that was designed and made specially as I knew my partner had a unique design in mind. Budget isnt an excuse for not getting it right - proposing is a special event and you need to at least try to get the finer details on point!

Can you go into a jewelers and try on a wedding ring with it?
You might prefer the final combination.

Big stones are not as easy to wear with a wedding ring.

Edited to congratulate you on your engagement 💞

I think it looks incredibly classic and pretty!

I would be irritated to be given a ring and have to put up and shut up from the gratitude, too.

I'm also a fan of antique rings. So much nicer on the hand.

If you are really not happy with it, I think you should ask to change it - after all he's asked you to marry him so presumably he knows you pretty well and will understand! But you must do it asap.

You could always get a vintage different style wedding band? Don't have to have the standard plain band!

Or the idea of exchanging for a wedding band and then an engagement ring from somewhere else is a good idea!

I think it looks lovely but I think it’s entirely reasonable to use thr credit for wedding rings and get one you prefer. Congratulations 😊

It looks really good.

This ring will be with you for life, explain gently that although you like the ring it is too small for your hand. Take it back and use the credit note for the wedding rings.

I wouldn't like that ring either, it looks plain and generic.

Congratulations!

I think the ring suits you, and it's classic.

But if you don't like it, then talk to your fiancé!

Shame that the jeweller won't do refunds. Is that even legal??

Could you exchange your ring for wedding bands?

What did you give your partner OP?