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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think DH is being unreasonable/making this difficult when it doesn’t need to be?

197 replies

Stressedmummy7 · 09/09/2023 22:14

We are going away on holiday (involving a long haul flight and DD wants to take the soft toys for on the plane) on Monday. DD wants to bring 3 soft toys in her backpack. DH is moaning and groaning saying she can only bring one, DH won’t stop going on about it. I personally think it’s fine for DD to take 3 as she knows she can’t have all 3 out at once and also her snacks etc go in my backpack normally so she will have room in hers for them. DH is trying to start an argument with me over and saying I’m “not being strict enough” with DD. Aibu to think DH is being unreasonable/making this more difficult than it needs to be?

OP posts:
SevenOhOne · 09/09/2023 22:15

He’s being a dick. Why can’t she take three?

YourNameGoesHere · 09/09/2023 22:16

Honestly I'd take one and make sure it's not super special. 3 toys is just asking for one to get lost or left behind.

SheerLucks · 09/09/2023 22:16

In a word, yes. She can take the three soft toys!

Original poster
Stressedmummy7 · 09/09/2023 22:17

@SevenOhOne he’s ranting on about their being no space etc for her to take 3 but there is. He’s also moaning that it “might be embarrassing a little” but he won’t give any detail on why he thinks it will be embarrassing.

OP posts:
Original poster
Stressedmummy7 · 09/09/2023 22:21

He’s now just said “I don’t understand why you are being laid back about this, you need to get strict with her”, those exact words.

OP posts:
WaltzingWaters · 09/09/2023 22:21

Why on earth would a hold having three soft toys be at all embarrassing??
Provided you have the space, 3 is fine. Just let her know she won’t have room for much else if she takes three soft toys.

SevenOhOne · 09/09/2023 22:23

He sounds nuts. I’m guessing that this was the sort of thing his parents did with him when he was little.

Original poster
Stressedmummy7 · 09/09/2023 22:23

SevenOhOne · 09/09/2023 22:23

He sounds nuts. I’m guessing that this was the sort of thing his parents did with him when he was little.

No idea as he doesn’t talk much about his childhood.

OP posts:
Densol57 · 09/09/2023 22:24

Tell him the toys are taking his place on the plane and leave the moany fucker behind !

Original poster
Stressedmummy7 · 09/09/2023 22:24

WaltzingWaters · 09/09/2023 22:21

Why on earth would a hold having three soft toys be at all embarrassing??
Provided you have the space, 3 is fine. Just let her know she won’t have room for much else if she takes three soft toys.

DH won’t explain why he thinks it will be embarrassing, he just says he thinks it will be but doesn’t give any reasons whatsoever.

OP posts:
Ffsmakeitstop · 09/09/2023 22:25

Tell him you don't understand why he's being such a miserable prick. Poor kid.

Bunnyhair · 09/09/2023 22:25

This is such a completely weird battle for your DH to pick. Is he by any chance nervous about travelling, and this is where all his anxiety is being redirected to?

Desperatehousewivesreruns · 09/09/2023 22:25

I'm with PP. What could possibly be embarrassing about a child having 3 soft toys?

If it fits in her bag, I'd let her take what she wants. It's great for them to be able to pack their own bags. Just be careful she doesn't lose any.

OhComeOnFFS · 09/09/2023 22:25

It sounds as though he wants to win when there isn't anything worth fighting over.

How big are the toys? Why not put one in your bag just in case her bag gets lost, and then she can have two in her bag?

TheBeesKnee · 09/09/2023 22:29

How old is she? Agree he's being odd but wonder if her age is affecting him.

Devilsmommy · 09/09/2023 22:30

How old is your dd? Though frankly no matter what age I don't see the problem. Tell him his face is embarrassing so plush toys aren't a problem 🤣🤣🤣

Babysharkdoodoodood · 09/09/2023 22:32

Depends. Is she 3 or 13?

WhatWouldTheDoctorDo · 09/09/2023 22:33

If she's got her own backpack I'd be relaxed about what she wants to take in it. Does he think she's a bit old for soft toys?

Hawkins0009 · 09/09/2023 22:34

Very strange of your dh

Original poster
Stressedmummy7 · 09/09/2023 22:37

DD is 7, her birthday was last week.

OP posts:
Quartz2208 · 09/09/2023 22:37

DD is 14 she still takes 4 soft toys with her, one has been on every holiday she has ever been on. She packs abd carries her backpack with her stuff abd has never been embarrassed

GreenMeanMachine · 09/09/2023 22:37

Does your DH pick off battles. My “D”H does. It drives me mad. Number of soft toys children can take on holiday is something he will make a decree on (won’t do anything else to organise the holiday). I just ignore him now and say to the children they can take what they can carry in a backpack.

No point reasoning with someone like this, because they will just double down.

GreenMeanMachine · 09/09/2023 22:38

Odd even

Heartofglass12345 · 09/09/2023 22:38

My son is 10 and loves his soft toys and we would never be embarrassed by him bringing them on a plane. Maybe she needs them for a bit of comfort as she's nervous, or maybe she just loves them!

Original poster
Stressedmummy7 · 09/09/2023 22:38

He’s still trying to cause an argument with me about it now!

OP posts:
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