To kick her chair during the inflight meal

[CanStopWillStop]

in short, red eye flight from America. The woman in front reclines her chair as soon as humanly possibly. No issue with that.

the inflight meal comes about 45mins in. She is the ONLY person in the cabin who keeps her seat reclined, bearing in mind she is sat bolt upright to eat.

I don’t believe it’s within my rights to ask her to (do the decent thing and) put her chair up so I can eat in comfort without her chair pressing against my forehead. Instead I did the petty thing and kicked her chair throughout I’m the inflight meal, so she had a taste of the discomfort that I have.

AIBU? 😂

[Sj07]

I'm confused.. you came here asking AIBU? Then got defensive and passive aggressive when people answered honestly? I understand you are uncomfortable talking to strangers, but surely you must know that kicking someone's seat because they perhaps forgot to adjust it before they ate is unreasonable? There must have been some doubt for you to come here asking? You're coming across quite an unpleasant person, you can behave rudely but expect better from others?

[Sassyfox]

Maybe she would have turned round and punched you in the face. 🤷‍♀️

That would be funny!

I’m sure they’ll be crying and playing the victim though.

Some people are sly bullies and would never actually confront anyone or stand up for themselves but do things slyly to try and intimidate others, just to make their miserable lives a bit better.
Its very pathetic.

[Grrrrdarling]

@CanStopWillStop

in short, red eye flight from America. The woman in front reclines her chair as soon as humanly possibly. No issue with that.

the inflight meal comes about 45mins in. She is the ONLY person in the cabin who keeps her seat reclined, bearing in mind she is sat bolt upright to eat.

I don’t believe it’s within my rights to ask her to (do the decent thing and) put her chair up so I can eat in comfort without her chair pressing against my forehead. Instead I did the petty thing and kicked her chair throughout I’m the inflight meal, so she had a taste of the discomfort that I have.

AIBU? 😂

Just ask her to pop her seat up so you can eat & stop being a baby.

[anunlikelyseahorse]

@furryfrontbottom

Plenty of people with stutters manage to communicate effectively. And if you cannot cope with having a brief interaction with a stranger, how on earth do you manage to get through airport security?

Wow so ignorant. Disfluency can be really debilitating. And people can be right nobs towards a disfluent speaker, making it even harder for the speaker. It can be incredibly isolating, and have a massive impact on mental health.

As an aside, I don't think it's okay to kick a chair, and I'm surprised the FA didn't ask her to put her chair up for the meal, I've been woken before now and requested to put my seat up for meals (if I'm awake I tend to keep my seat upright anyway).

[Grrrrdarling]

@CanStopWillStop

in short, red eye flight from America. The woman in front reclines her chair as soon as humanly possibly. No issue with that.

the inflight meal comes about 45mins in. She is the ONLY person in the cabin who keeps her seat reclined, bearing in mind she is sat bolt upright to eat.

I don’t believe it’s within my rights to ask her to (do the decent thing and) put her chair up so I can eat in comfort without her chair pressing against my forehead. Instead I did the petty thing and kicked her chair throughout I’m the inflight meal, so she had a taste of the discomfort that I have.

AIBU? 😂

If you can’t ask them to put their seat up ask the flight attendant to ask for you.
It isn’t rocket science.
Seats up at meal times for the comfort of all!

[Grrrrdarling]

@CanStopWillStop

🤣🤣🤣 uh oh, did I get this wrong? I’m inconsiderate, she is not – got it!

Two wrongs don’t make a right.
What you didn’t do was communicate the issue, like an adult, to the person with their seat still laid back.
Maybe this was their 1st time flying & they didn’t realise how little space you had with the seat back but either way you made what was a simple to fix issue into a whole other level drama.

In-future if you can’t ask the person to ‘please put their seat up so you can eat your meal’ ask the flight attendant to ask for you. Don’t just assume someone will know what your issue is from you just kicking their chair like a petulant child!
I’d just ignore you too because as a parent I’m well versed at ignoring annoying little things.

[TheBerry]

Your response does seem quite petty and childish. Most people seem to think YABU, and you did come on here seeking people’s opinions, but now don’t seem able to accept those people’s opinions.

Possibly the woman was just having an off day and didn’t connect that her seat was down unnecessarily and getting in your way. She’s inconsiderate, sure, but either way kicking her seat is unhelpful and immature.

Fair enough if you have a stutter and don’t want to speak to her, but kicking her chair doesn’t help and actually greatly increases the chance that she’ll say something to you and you’ll have to verbally respond.

[BadNomad]

I find it more interesting that the OP genuinely seems to think that most people have a petty side. I really dont think most people have pettiness as part of their personality. I cant imagine anyone I know behaving like this. But maybe I'm just lucky.

[Merlo]

She was wrong, then you were wrong, then things got really weird……

[ZeldaWillTellYourFortune]

Again, what airline & aircraft? I've been on just about every one, going back 45 years, and seats simply don't reclne enough to put someone else's head in your face, to impede eating, etc.

Petty people fabricate these situations for attention, IME.

[AliceOlive]

@ZeldaWillTellYourFortune

Again, what airline & aircraft? I've been on just about every one, going back 45 years, and seats simply don't reclne enough to put someone else's head in your face, to impede eating, etc.

Petty people fabricate these situations for attention, IME.

That’s just not true. I’ve been on aircraft where a person in front of me fully reclined is hugely uncomfortable and makes it difficult to use the tray. Count yourself lucky if you fly that much and haven’t experienced this.

[Mouldyfoodhelp]

To be clear, recliner lady was rude, but I don't see how kicking her seat constantly was a better solution for either of you instead of asking her to put her seat up for a while

[Grrrrdarling]

@CanStopWillStop

I’m not disabled. I guess if i were deranged I would be classed as mentally ill, unless your intention was to use mental illness as a slur against me?

You live with a condition that limits your everyday activities in some way so you are disabled. Disadvantaged ability = dis’ability.
Own your uniqueness but try not to let it turn you into a bitter, twisted antagonist; even when tired & jet lagged.

I guess it is hard to see yourself as disabled when you live with something all your life 🤷‍♀️
Your speech impediment means you sometimes need more time to get your point across, more understanding while trying to get your point across & support when trying to get your point across.

In this case you clearly needed help to get the message across appropriately!

I’ve only been living with my physical disabilities for 11years but my mental abilities issues have been with me for 27years.
I never considered myself as disabled with my mental issues because I sort of grew up with them, found ways of coping with them & got on with things as if it was normal & how everyone felt. Now I am older I know different & know I was let down by the system that should have been there to support me to live well with my disability.
Now I have physical impairments too & I definitely I feel disabled.
My brain still keeps telling me I am the person I was before I became physically disabled & I mourn for that person every day.

[Dinoswearunderpants]

How pathetic. Frequent flyer here, if someone purposely kicked my chair, I'd purposely be pushing back in it at any opportunity.

Are you a little on the large side so was more uncomfortable because the recline?

[Grrrrdarling]

@Merlo

She was wrong, then you were wrong, then things got really weird……

Exactly.
I honestly don’t know what OP was expecting from this post but they certainly got the attention they wanted 😂
I’m guessing the reaction they have got isn’t what they were expecting though 😂😂😂😂

[AliceOlive]

A man I know spent an entire flight putting the window shade up each time the guy next to him leaned over him and out it down.

Another friend told me about fighting over the armrest with the passenger in the aisle seat, elbowing back and forth for most of the flight.

Some of us do get petty while traveling. I think it comes from just being travel weary and tired people’s basic inconsideration.

I find it quite funny and appreciate the OP sharing. Most people will not tell you the petty things they occasionally do.

[5128gap]

Its a very unintelligent thing to do, as there is no chance of it resulting in your desired outcome. Asking her to adjust the seat was very likely to have enabled you to eat in comfort, as few people would have refused, given they weren't even reclining at that time.
You appear to have chosen to kick a chair instead of making a request. If you dislike speaking to strangers you need to balance that against getting what you want.

[whumpthereitis]

@BadNomad

I find it more interesting that the OP genuinely seems to think that most people have a petty side. I really dont think most people have pettiness as part of their personality. I cant imagine anyone I know behaving like this. But maybe I'm just lucky.

I admittedly can be petty as shit, but honestly this is just kinda sad and cowardly. At most. She didn’t have to directly speak to her, but she could have communicated she wanted her to adjust the seat. Instead she just sat, seethed about it, and gave one impotent kick. She’s now given it far more headspace than the woman did, if she was even aware of it. I’m not seeing what’s gloat-worthy.

[StrawberryJam4Ever]

I find that many people who recline at the beginning tend to stay reclined until the very end. On my last flight I asked someone to pull the seat forward whilst I was eating. They did, & never reclined again. Or just tap the back of their seat & make eye contact with the staff, & they’ll tell them. But some will recline again as soon as they finish eating. I wait for them to drop off & grab the headrest every time I stand & sit, or put my head forward & laugh loudly as close to their ear as possible, & give the chair a kick every so often. These cunts know what they’re doing. Like you say OP, most of the time they’re sitting forward.

[whatsinaname2]

@Merlo

She was wrong, then you were wrong, then things got really weird……

Exactly this. I don't think someone forgetting to put their seat upright during an inflight meal and then someone else getting angry and kicking a seat is a particularly interesting story. But OP's humour is really cringey, like....read the room hun 🫶

[Sassyfox]

Some of us do get petty while traveling. I think it comes from just being travel weary and tired people’s basic inconsideration.

I find it quite funny and appreciate the OP sharing. Most people will not tell you the petty things they occasionally do.

I would not be petty like this.
I would expect this sort of behaviour from a young child, not a grown woman.

I am an adult and I would just ask the person to put their chair up.

Why be petty and potentially start an aggressive confrontation when you can just ask.

[AliceOlive]

@Sassyfox

Some of us do get petty while traveling. I think it comes from just being travel weary and tired people’s basic inconsideration.

I find it quite funny and appreciate the OP sharing. Most people will not tell you the petty things they occasionally do.

I would not be petty like this.
I would expect this sort of behaviour from a young child, not a grown woman.

I am an adult and I would just ask the person to put their chair up.

Why be petty and potentially start an aggressive confrontation when you can just ask.

We are not all at our best 100% of the time. What’s interesting to me is to hear that other adults sometimes do foolish or petty things. Clearly the OP knows it’s ridiculous or wouldn’t be telling us.

It would never cross my mind that someone was reluctant to ask me to move in public because of a speech impediment. Reading this will make me more empathetic to others.

[BadNomad]

@whumpthereitis

I admittedly can be petty as shit, but honestly this is just kinda sad and cowardly. At most. She didn’t have to directly speak to her, but she could have communicated she wanted her to adjust the seat. Instead she just sat, seethed about it, and gave one impotent kick. She’s now given it far more headspace than the woman did, if she was even aware of it. I’m not seeing what’s gloat-worthy.

It's bizarre isn't it. She thinks she was teaching the other lady a lesson. But that only works if the other lady knew that's what was going on. The other lady probably just thought the OP...had some issues and thought it best to ignore it.

[AliceOlive]

No, she was just taking out her annoyance in a petty way.

No one should be reclining as soon as a flight takes off. It’s typically not allowed until you reach altitude. Some flights announce to put your seat upright during meals.

Nothing big happened here. Just a minor non-interaction between two of the billions of humans on the planet. OP did as she chose, the other lady may not have even noticed.

[Doesthepopeshitinthewoods]

@WiIson

Maybe she would have turned round and punched you in the face. 🤷‍♀️

Maybe. But she’d have been the one arrested when we landed.