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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to want to study some more?

234 replies

Swedes2Turnips1 · 02/01/2008 23:39

I am a Bachelor of Laws and have a postgraduate journalism qualificaton. I also have 4 (very lovely) children: 5 months, 2 years, one just joined senior school and one about to sit GCSEs. I really fancy studying philosophy. Would it be terribly selfish?

OP posts:
TellusMater · 02/01/2008 23:41

No! Have biochemistry degree, PhD and PGCE, and am now doing a psychology degree and seriously considering some postgrad study in that too.

Love studying

pinetreedog · 02/01/2008 23:42

crikey, how do you afford it, mater?

wessexgirl · 02/01/2008 23:43

Why would it be selfish? Your children need to know about metaphysics fgs.

TellusMater · 02/01/2008 23:44

OU. Not too pricey compared to "brick" university.

wessexgirl · 02/01/2008 23:45

(Not being flippant there btw. I am an OU junkie.)

kama · 02/01/2008 23:45

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

Niecie · 02/01/2008 23:47

No - go for it. I can't imagine ever giving up studying for long. Another OU devotee here.

Makes you a good role model and the older ones can't argue you don't know what homework is like these days.

Keeps me sane whilst a SAHM too.

MeMySonAndI · 02/01/2008 23:53

Keep going, if you have the time. I did my second master when DS was a baby. If I could turn back time I would have waited until he was older (I think I missed a lot of DS and the studies by trying to juggle both together but if you can find enough support to prevent you to stop sleeping in order to get the assignments done, go ahead!!!)

BTW I had a bit of philosophy while doing my master... Gosh! reading a full book in history was far easier and faster than a single article on philosophy! But very rewarding (when I finally got the point!)

pinkyminky · 03/01/2008 00:06

Sounds like a fab idea. I did BA at normal 19-21 years old and after some more vocational training and working I went back much later to do my MFA and really enjoyed it. I'd love to do a degree in another subject at some point.
A well educated mum can be a great thing for children.

Quattrocento · 03/01/2008 00:07

Beats working for a living and its a relatively harmless hobby.

TellusMater · 03/01/2008 00:09

LOL.

The downside is that when you're busting a gut revising for an exam you get hte "hobby" comments which do make you want to spit...

hatwoman · 03/01/2008 00:10

do it. but find something do-able iykwim. I have a BA (in philosophy infact) and an MPhil. and a couple of years ago I went back to full-time study and did an LLM. It was brilliant - totally loved it - but it was bloody hard work - mainly because it did put big stresses on the whole family. In my mid-30s I cared enormously about doing well - I really didn;t want to compromise at all - but, obviously with kids, I had to, to an extent - that was hard to swallow. I was fortunate in that I could afford some childcare - but in some ways that was a source of relationship stress - dh working his arse off in a job he just about tolerates, paying the mortgage, me costing us a fortune to indulge my interests and not-very-profitable career. It all took a certain amount of adjusting. dh is a hero though and put up with me - including taking the kids away when I had exams. and I got the distinction I desperately wanted . I have never felt better about achieving something - I am so much prouder of that than my wastrel degrees taken in my 20s!

Find the right thing for you and family - right level of commitment - or maybe if you;re like me, stretch yourself a bit. it's a wonderful thing to do.

If you want to dip your toes in you could do an a-level by distance study - but you might find it a bit bobbins - dh did history and found it all a bit teenage!

Quattrocento · 03/01/2008 00:13

But I wasn't joking - I mean studying and busting a gut with a longer term objective in mind seems fine.

But all this hobby learning funded by someone else seems a bit self-indulgent. Kind of being like a gym-bunny. Why can't you just read around the areas you're interested in if you are interested in the subjects for themselves?

pinkyminky · 03/01/2008 00:19

I found my MFA very useful in my professional life as an artist. There are some of us around.

TellusMater · 03/01/2008 00:20

I have a long term objective, but have no objection to people studying for its own sake. It is easier to get motivated if there is a structured programme than just "reading around the subject". And there is the interaction with other students, and with teachers. Much more satisfying really IME.

But then I don't have a problem with gym bunnies either TBH...

MeMySonAndI · 03/01/2008 00:24

Quatrocentto, because the best part about the studies is to be in touch with people who have the same interest and commitment to the topic and the discussions around it?

TellusMater · 03/01/2008 00:25

Actually, I do feel rather self-indulgent.
I'm enjoying myself hugely.
But I don't see it as a bad thing.

ShinyHappyPeopleHoldingHands · 03/01/2008 00:28

Oh God you guys.. how do you do it?? I am limping painfully throught my first (and I'm sure.. ONLY) OU degree.. just passed another exam.. three years done, three to go.. graduation still seems eons away and IS!

I like it, my grades are ok-good but not fab.. my exam passes no higher than level 2.. can't help but wonder how well I could have done if I had done it the "easy" way.. at a brick university, no kids, and no obligations but a hectic social life! Gawd, those kids don't know they're born do they.. .. and some of them have the gall to sneer at us doing it the OU way I've noticed!

But you lot.. you have PHDs coming out of your ears and other orifices (sp?!) FGS!! How do you juggle everything? My last pass is a mystery to me.. I did minimum study all year and substituted one TMA..

And next month I'm doing a Level 3! Will it be much more pressure? [faints at thought]

[recovers and adds] .. it's the work/study I find hard.. it's juggling it around my high maintenance family/obligations.. it always comes last!

And do we REALLY not get to wear a mortar board at our (OU!) graduation ceremonies??! WHY NOT?! I want to wear one! I will have earned it!!!!

ShinyHappyPeopleHoldingHands · 03/01/2008 00:29

*meant to say "it's NOT the work/study I find hard..."

TellusMater · 03/01/2008 00:30

I didn't wear a cap at my (brick university) graduation shiny.

pinkyminky · 03/01/2008 00:30

Absolutely.It's the interaction with other students and teachers that is really stimulating.
One of my SIL spent years studying 'paid for by her husband', I suppose you could say, but bringing up three children is a job. She now earns more than him.

Niecie · 03/01/2008 00:32

You have to be careful doing OU Masters as a lot of them don't have tutorials because they don't have enough students. I am missing the interaction with others. It is not the same posting on the OU boards and not getting a reply for days. It can be a bit lonely.

I would have thought a lot of what makes philosophy's interesting is the discussion.

pinkyminky · 03/01/2008 00:34

Didn't go to either of my ceremonies

MeMySonAndI · 03/01/2008 00:34

Mortarboards are over rated, they are quite uncomfortable! DexH had the doubtful honour of wearing half a coconut covered in felt with some tasels around it when he finished his PhD. All the photos of said graduation have been burned!

twentypence · 03/01/2008 00:36

I'm sure my dad had a mortar board at his OU. I didn't have one for my MA - but they still pop one on for the photos! I have tremendous respect for the OU and people who do their degrees. My dad worked full time and over time and brought up and played with 2 kids and put up with my mother being negative all the time and got up at 3am to watch some beardie guy in a wide tie because we didn't have a video. My student days were easy peasy by comparison.

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