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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

My partner is at a fucking bbq/party

348 replies

Namechangex10000 · 17/05/2020 21:26

I am livid. I do not consider myself to be a stickler for rules, I’m not over the top, I “allow” him to go to work even though I know he still socialising whilst at work, but I can’t do much about it.

We have a nearly 2yo ds. Last week ds was diagnosed with an ear and chest infection.

Today, he went out to get some bits for us to continued work on the house, and instead of doing that, he swanned off to a bbq (he is still there, despite arguing about it and me “telling him how it is”) all day. I just can’t beieve it. He just keeps saying “well I asked you if you wanted to come”

Is it me? Am I wrong?

Because I think he’s a fucking moron of the highest order and he simply cannot see it?

OP posts:
ScarletFever · 17/05/2020 21:27

you "allow" him to go to work?? excuse me?

HollysBush · 17/05/2020 21:28

What do you mean you ‘allow’ him to go to work?!

OnNaturesCourse · 17/05/2020 21:30

I'd be locking the door and telling him to come back once he's isolated for 2 weeks. No word of a lie. My DP would be moved out to his mother's if he done that when we had a sick child at home especially since the little one has a chest infection.

FTMF30 · 17/05/2020 21:30

It seems like he went to the BBQ to stick it you for being a CF.

FTMF30 · 17/05/2020 21:31

He's still wrong for going though.

Original poster
Namechangex10000 · 17/05/2020 21:33

Really? I clearly said “allow” in quotations because allow is obviously not the right description but I didn’t know how else to put it???? If he is socialising at work (as in, hanging out and drinking and having a nice old time with his mates while there) then really, I shouldn’t be allowing him in the house, because those aren’t the rules are they? They are supposed to working, whilst adhering to social distancing, and then coming home, but I don’t say anything about this, just let him get on with it.

Honestly cannot believe anybody would misinterpret what I said as anything else?

OP posts:
Original poster
Namechangex10000 · 17/05/2020 21:33

@FTMF30 how the hell am I cheeky fucker?! 🤣

OP posts:
opticaldelusion · 17/05/2020 21:34

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opticaldelusion · 17/05/2020 21:36

None of this makes sense. So he goes to work but instead of working he and his colleagues just drink? And his employer is cool with that? That seems.. unlikely. And absolutely nothing to do with coronavirus.

bloodyhellsbellsx · 17/05/2020 21:36

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Figgygal · 17/05/2020 21:36

Clearly yanbu ignore all the clever fuckers on here

Original poster
Namechangex10000 · 17/05/2020 21:36

So, he can go to work, finish at 4, and then sit about getting pissed with his mates until 8 when he feels like coming home?

And again “telling him how it is” was used loosely (I have been explaining to him, how he is putting our son at risk by going to god damn party, and that frankly, me and son might as well have just gone too, because it is no different to him now coming home and spreading it all about?!?)

Controlling and unhinged 🤣 ok

OP posts:
Bluntness100 · 17/05/2020 21:37

Where does he work that he’s hanging out and drinking on the job?

Original poster
Namechangex10000 · 17/05/2020 21:37

He’s a builder, his work mates, consist of whatever mate of his he is working with at the time (and they are not the most straight laced bunch) so yeah, they crack on as though they’re in the pub.

OP posts:
HollysBush · 17/05/2020 21:37

YADNBU. He shouldn’t have been at a bbq!
But what job does he do where he gets to drink and have a nice time?

Bluntness100 · 17/05/2020 21:38

Spreading what all about? What are you talking about? Has he tested positive for Covid? If not what’s he spreading all about?

AnneLovesGilbert · 17/05/2020 21:38

You’re very angry. He’s not going to change. What are you going to do?

CoachBombay · 17/05/2020 21:38

Why would you even think the sentence was pertinent, never mind "allow", your DP goes to work, that's all that was needed.

Are you always this highly strung? No wonder he has gone to a BBQ if you've chewed his ear off all day about how you already allow him to go to work 😳

I'd be packing my bags never mind a BBQ

Original poster
Namechangex10000 · 17/05/2020 21:38

Bloodyhellsbells - you don’t see my son having an injection as a need for my partner to adhere more strictly to social distancing? Wow, maybe he is right after all!

OP posts:
opticaldelusion · 17/05/2020 21:39

So he's not socialising at work. He's socialising after work. If you explained things properly, people might understand a bit better. Because your opening post just makes you sound like a nightmare.

tartanbow · 17/05/2020 21:40

wow people on here are mental! ignore the ones who have clearly come on here to start on you as they have nothing better to do.

OP I totally get why youd be annoyed about this, so would I. probably wouldn't be bothered if they were socially distancing but if there is alcohol involved I doubt that would be stuck to all the time.

FTMF30 · 17/05/2020 21:40

I meant control freak (damn Mumsnet acronyms!) Doesn't he need to go to work to earn money?

Original poster
Namechangex10000 · 17/05/2020 21:40

Opticaldelusion, he drinks at work, all day, even whilst still working - does that clarify?

OP posts:
Bluntness100 · 17/05/2020 21:41

they crack on as though they’re in the pub

That’s not great, but I’ve got to be honest, I can understand his temptation there,,,

Isawamagpie · 17/05/2020 21:41

Why are people pulling your post apart?
Its quite obvious what you mean.

You are 100% nbu!!!!
He shouldn't be at a bbq, he should be home with you and your daughter. Nowhere has anyone said its acceptable to swan off to a bbq at another house during this time.
I would be raging too, op.