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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Oh fuck, I’ve no excuse not to be part of the PTA

201 replies

MoonBaby1 · 25/02/2020 23:04

I’ve used the new baby excuse for as long as possible. He’s almost two so that’s wearing thin. I only work three days a week and it’s flexible around school times.

It’s only a tiny rural school that relies on parent volunteers so I’m just going to have to dive in right?

OP posts:
haveuheard · 25/02/2020 23:05

If you want to, yes. If you don't, don't. You aren't at school and it isn't some sort of evil cult.

PurpleDaisies · 25/02/2020 23:07

Just say no.

ExtraOnions · 25/02/2020 23:07

If you don’t want to do it, don’t do it. As a PSA chair, I’m not sure I wouldn’t want anyone who felt forced to be on it. I want enthusiastic volunteers who want to be there, not someone there under duress.

AnneLovesGilbert · 25/02/2020 23:07

Why do you need an excuse? No thanks will do fine.

Tinty · 25/02/2020 23:07

YABU, get pregnant again 😁, anything to avoid the hell that is PTA Grin

GiveHerHellFromUs · 25/02/2020 23:08

You don't need an excuse. Just saying you're not interested.

If you feel like you have to join just do everything really badly and make a complete nuisance of yourself until they ask you to stop.

AuditAngel · 25/02/2020 23:14

I have diligently refused to join the PTA (oldest is in year 11, youngest in year 4) but I do help out when I can.

This way I am not under pressure, but I can be guilt free

raspberryk · 25/02/2020 23:20

Also a diligent avoider here, never an excuse, just I don't want to. Plus I very much dislike anyone I've met who has ever been on any pta board.

Rosspoldarkssaddle · 25/02/2020 23:56

Assuming the pta are there to provide funding for enhancement to your children's education, yabu
If everyone took that approach, the kids would have nothing extra outside their meagre budgets.
It's only 1 school year meaning four possible events ish. You don't need to be best friends with everyone, just work for a common cause.

Designerenvy · 26/02/2020 00:01

Only join if you're interested, not because you feel under pressure to do it.
I only joined our PA this year and my eldest is 15, my youngest is 10.
I just didn't have the time before now. I'm doing it now, because it suits me and I want to give something back. I'm finding I'm enjoying it but that's because the timing was right.
You can always wait a couple of years if you feel it's not for you now.

Justajot · 26/02/2020 00:04

Do you do anything voluntary in your local community? I take the view that I do one voluntary activity and that absolves me from doing any others. So I don't do pta stuff. If you don't then maybe you could pick something else you'd rather do and use that as an explanation if necessary.

Emmelina · 26/02/2020 02:25

I help my PTA by buying cake. Lots and lots of cake

99problemsandthecatis1 · 26/02/2020 02:29

Why wouldn't you want to? The amount our PTA do for our school, I think it's wonderful! But if you don't want to then don't!

MustShowDH · 26/02/2020 02:29

Find someway that you can help that suits you.
Maybe admin/facebook posts you can do at home, wrapping lucky dip prizes at home, making cakes at home...
You see the 'at home' theme? You can help without having to be too 'involved' then.

Dandelion1993 · 26/02/2020 02:55

Grow up, be an adult and just say no!

Topseyt · 26/02/2020 03:03

Just say no. You don't need any excuse. I was never interested in things like that.

GinDaddy · 26/02/2020 03:22

Not sure if I was on the PTA that I would want someone who doesn't really want to be there but feels they've run out of excuses not to be there.

Just decide what you want, then do it. No amount of responses on here is going to help you do that.

JayAlfredPrufrock · 26/02/2020 03:27

Are they begging you to join because you have so much to offer?

BoomBoomsCousin · 26/02/2020 03:51

You don’t have to, no. There will be plenty of other parents who could do more but don’t. But if you do get involved you’ll likely; have a positive impact on lots of kids, including your own. You may even enjoy some of it, failing that you could regale us with tales of ridiculous shinanegans!

ByeByeMissAmericanPie · 26/02/2020 04:32

My mantra has always been ‘I don’t do committees’ but ask me to run the cake stall/ be a regular helper etc and I’ll be there.

So it shows a commitment... but without spending hours at someone’s kitchen table with a load of people you don’t like.

user1483387154 · 26/02/2020 04:40

just say no thanks.

Standrewsschool · 26/02/2020 05:07

It’s not a cult and you may enjoy it. You don’t have to commit week-in , week-out. Maybe say you can help at certain events, rather than joining the committee.

Monty27 · 26/02/2020 05:11

Just say it's not your bag. I got roped on once. It was hell on earth. And that was a Catholic primary school 😳🙄

PenelopeFlintstone · 26/02/2020 05:13

You can just give them a donation instead. Then they leave you alone.

squeekums · 26/02/2020 05:15

Small rural school here too
I'm not on, nor ever will be the PTA. No excuse

I don't get bailed up bout it cos dd catches the bus and I'm rarely on school grounds. It's amazing how many call for help notes dd bag eats....